Worst thing a person ever said to you in bed

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  • RerogRerog 569 Posts
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    b, 21this thread has so many laughs. it should be a go-to for a sad day.
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    b, 21True...I'm gonna go watch this episode of Trailer Park Boys and check back in in a half hour.
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    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21The last half hour of this thread has sucked...b, 21b, 21So on to the next episode.

  • Has it broken? inside of me?......get it out!

  • Big_StacksBig_Stacks "I don't worry about hittin' power, cause I don't give 'em nuttin' to hit." 4,670 Posts
    Hey,b, 21b, 21Here's one:b, 21b, 21-While providing me with oral pleasure, this babe said "I want it (the johnson) in me right now" (sans condom).b, 21b, 21I replied that I couldn't do that, which more or less, spoiled the mood. But, she came over next week for her "Friday night session" so it was all good.b, 21b, 21Some other ditties include:b, 21b, 21-"No, you can't put it in my ass." (My ex-fiancee wasn't down with the 3rd input).b, 21-"I'm not ready for this yet." (The femme fronted on givin' up the drawls on the 1-yard line; No means no, but I did eventually bone her on another occasion).b, 21-"Don't cum in my mouth." (Everyone loves a catcher, come on).b, 21-"That might be my ex-boyfriend." (Chick's response to my question of "Who's that" after hearing some loud banging on her apartment door at 6AM).b, 21-"Yes, honey!!!" (A woman's response to her 3-year old son's call of "Mommy" at her bedroom door. This totally ruined the blow job and made me feel like a creep).b, 21-"I'm sorry, I thought I was done" (My ex-fiancee mis-counted the days, if you know what I mean; Yuck-related and this definitely ended the session).b, 21b, 21Peace,b, 21b, 21Big Stacks from Kakalak

  • luckluck 4,077 Posts
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    b, 21Whoa...20? Really? That right there is the real plot line to this thread people.
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    b, 21Ha, well without making any presumptions about any of my fellow AZN brethren around here, statistically speaking, Asian Americans rank last among all ethnic groups in terms of age of first sexual encounter.
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    b, 21So basically, I'm blaming racism
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    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21You are not alone (cue MJ).b, 21b, 21For me, it was an even longer wait. But religion was to blame.

  • bassiebassie 11,710 Posts
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    b, 213. "I thought it was off... I didn't know! I am really sorry. I would have never let you do that if I knew it was still on"
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    b, 21I'm trying to figure this one out and decided better not to try.
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    b, 21Aunt Flo. Coming to town. You know.
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    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21I thought she was talking about a video camera!

  • dirtydirty 93 Posts
    had a weekender once with this girl I met at a show back in my "playing in funk band days". anywho on day 2 after we did the do, we're talking in bed and she says b, 21b, 21"I have something to tell you.......I used to be a prostitute" b, 21b, 21For a second I was buggin but then I was like "I'm glad your not anymore cuz I'm broke as fusk"

  • "This is weird. I feel like I'm in high school and I'm this nerdy girl and you're the cool guy. I'm sorry... I have to go."

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    b, 213. "I thought it was off... I didn't know! I am really sorry. I would have never let you do that if I knew it was still on"
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    b, 21I'm trying to figure this one out and decided better not to try.
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    b, 21Aunt Flo. Coming to town. You know.
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    b, 21I thought she was talking about a video camera!
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    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21Baby intercom!

  • I have learned a thing or 2 when women have spoken up to me in bed:b, 21b, 21"don't pet the dog and then put your fingers in my p***y without washing your hands first, what the f*ck is wrong with you?"b, 21b, 21True.b, 21b, 21And in terms of that time of the month, hell yeah most women tend to get much more in the mood right before and sometimes during- put a towel down like o-dub said, it ain't no thang and the ride is soooo smooth.

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    b, 21And in terms of that time of the month, hell yeah most women tend to get much more in the mood right before and sometimes during- put a towel down like o-dub said, it ain't no thang and the ride is soooo smooth.
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    font class="post"1b, 21So very true with every lady I've encountered so far.b, 21b/wb, 21img src="http://i42.tinypic.com/2wejwj9.jpg" width=50%1

  • DB_CooperDB_Cooper Manhatin' 7,823 Posts
    Can't say I've ever been particularly thrown by anything a lady has said to me in bed. I did, however, call an ex the wrong name whilst doing the do. Her name was Wendy, and I called her Emily. b, 21b, 21Twice. On two different occasions.b, 21b, 21b, 21I don't even know anyone named Emily. img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/oof.gif" alt="" 21

  • luckluck 4,077 Posts
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    b, 213. "I thought it was off... I didn't know! I am really sorry. I would have never let you do that if I knew it was still on"
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    b, 21I'm trying to figure this one out and decided better not to try.
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    b, 21Aunt Flo. Coming to town. You know.
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    b, 21I thought she was talking about a video camera!
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    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21You know what? I'm not so sure anymore. I initially read the line as "I thought [u]I/u1/b1 was off." Now we all need a clarification.

  • luckluck 4,077 Posts
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    b, 21the last girl I was with got
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    b, 21This has been pretty common in my experience.
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    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21Agreed.

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    b, 21"This is weird. I feel like I'm in high school and I'm this nerdy girl and you're the cool guy. I'm sorry... I have to go."
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    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/funnypost.gif" alt="" 21b, 21b, 21this one could really use some more context...

  • I actually just finished reading in cosmo (no judgement) about this and there have been studies and they say at least 20% of laydee's experience heightened sex drives, and ONLY 1 in 5 chicks didn't want sex at that time!!b, 21b, 21So guess it is rather common and although they didn't recommend using teeth, they did give the thumbs up for oral sex if you didn't feel like sexsex!b, 21So there you have it.....

  • batmonbatmon 27,574 Posts
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    b, 21I actually just finished reading in cosmo (no judgement)
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    b, 21I actually just finished reading in cosmo (no judgement)
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    b, 21rent increased
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    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANTS!! b, 21b, 21Hey, it's 26degrees out......perfect trashy mag reading weather b4 work..... img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/liljohn.gif" alt="" 21

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    b, 21I actually just finished reading in cosmo (no judgement)
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    b, 21rent increased
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    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21on 2nd thoughts....that would have been a totally awesome worst thing ever said in bed!!!!b, 21b, 21b, 21b, 21b, 21 b1RENT INCREASED/b1 b, 21b, 21b, 21 img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/oof.gif" alt="" 21 haha...

  • hemolhemol 2,578 Posts
    It takes more than a little bit of old uteran lining to keep me out of the lake, if you catch my drift. I'm in it face first too.

  • Big_StacksBig_Stacks "I don't worry about hittin' power, cause I don't give 'em nuttin' to hit." 4,670 Posts
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    b, 21 It takes more than a little bit of old uteran lining to keep me out of the lake, if you catch my drift. I'm in it face first too.
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    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21Yo,b, 21b, 21You're a nas-tay muthafucka!!! Ewwwwwwwww!!!! I can't get down with Aunt Flo, I prefer to wait until she leaves.b, 21b, 21Peace,b, 21b, 21Big Stacks from Kakalak

  • mannybolonemannybolone Los Angeles, CA 15,025 Posts
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    b, 21 It takes more than a little bit of old uteran lining to keep me out of the lake, if you catch my drift. I'm in it face first too.
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    b, 21Yo,
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    b, 21You're a nas-tay muthafucka!!! Ewwwwwwwww!!!! I can't get down with Aunt Flo, I prefer to wait until she leaves.
    b, 21
    b, 21Peace,
    b, 21
    b, 21Big Stacks from Kakalak
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    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21I don't have a problem with "Aunt Flo" but "old uteran lining" isn't exactly putting the wind in my sails.

  • Big_StacksBig_Stacks "I don't worry about hittin' power, cause I don't give 'em nuttin' to hit." 4,670 Posts
    Hey,b, 21b, 21I forgot about this one:b, 21b, 21-"You gotta go before my daughter wakes up in the morning." (This sistah didn't want her little girl to see a man comin' outta mommy's room. I understand, but I was trying to get a little "morning delight" before I bounced).b, 21b, 21Peace,b, 21b, 21Big Stacks from Kakalak

  • Man I'm glad this thread was resurrected. b, 21b, 21For one, it really reminded me how hot those punkish S&M stripper types Bambouche dated were.

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    b, 21hell, while I'm drunk, I'll tell you dudes I've even "done that" while "she was". Pulled tampons out with my teeth and shit.
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    b, 21Am I alone here?
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    b, 21Nope.
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    b, 21And I don't even drink.
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    b, 21My man Herm! I knew we had a bond!
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    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21Are you guys being serious? Serious serious? Wow?!?!?!b, 21b, 21b, 21I won't F*ck a girl on her period...I can't imagine doing that..no offense.

  • hemolhemol 2,578 Posts
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    b, 21 It takes more than a little bit of old uteran lining to keep me out of the lake, if you catch my drift. I'm in it face first too.
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    b, 21Yo,
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    b, 21You're a nas-tay muthafucka!!! Ewwwwwwwww!!!! I can't get down with Aunt Flo, I prefer to wait until she leaves.
    b, 21
    b, 21Peace,
    b, 21
    b, 21Big Stacks from Kakalak
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    b, 21I don't have a problem with "Aunt Flo" but "old uteran lining" isn't exactly putting the wind in my sails.
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    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21It's just body parts.

  • SoulOnIceSoulOnIce 13,027 Posts
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    b, 21It's just body parts.
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    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21Are you responding to Crink, or is this just the worst b, 21thing you ever said to somebody in bed?
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