TAKE THAT SHIT TO THE-BRITS.COM

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  • what's with all the pub rock discussion...? ;)

    as for rock bassists/vocalists, the likes of kim gordon and kim deal are more my era.

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    You kiddies get back to your armchair soccer ball viewing, or your netweb space invader games, or whatever.

    Actually, I am newly in receipt of my tickets to the last game of the season against the mighty 'Pool.

    Blackpool, that is.

  • bennyboybennyboy 538 Posts
    Lynott used to catch the bus outside my Mum's house in the Coombe in the 60's.

    That is all.

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,889 Posts
    "Blimey! How did that get in there?"

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-northern-ireland-17582542

    An investigation is under way after indecent images were "inadvertently" shown by a Catholic priest during a presentation at a primary school in County Tyrone.

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    Oh, Jimster.
    Oh, Jimster, Jimster, Jimster.

    What went wrong?

    I'll tell you what went wrong. Some big swinging dicks came in and ethnically cleansed a decent, proper roots working class football club, turning it into a fucking "project", populating it with suave, snake-oil euromang playboys and dilettante prima donnas (continued p94)

    ::fumingbutsmug::

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    WTF is Ballotelli on?
    Jesus fucking Christ.

    Love him to bits!

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,889 Posts
    Mid-table over/underachievers was more fun. No arguing Uni*ed are the best team, they are better managed.

    Mancini abandoned the 442 midway and it's been shit since. To be fair, City have been creating chances in the games they blew - they did everything except score, and conceded soft goals. Un*ted very rarely do this.

    Ballo gotta go. Lad's a liability, innee? Shame as I like his style but he can't do us any good if he's off the pitch.

  • el_sparkoel_sparko 884 Posts
    City's downturn seems to have coincided with Silva's. He's been shit for a lot of 2012 and I think that's been the biggest reason for them flopping, people seem to be keen to make Balotelli the scapegoat though which is a bit unfair.

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    Citeh have Da Silva but Man Poo got da gold.

    Quite proud of that one, feel free to use it.

  • DuderonomyDuderonomy Haut de la Garenne 7,784 Posts
    Just got back from a couple of weeks in teh States with my brother. Made an unscheduled overnight stay in Boston, went to North End (Italian quarter) to eat and the Irish district to drink, and slept in the airport. Bostonians are not particularly friendly. It's not that they're out-and-out rude, but more like they aren't too bothered with being nice. Got on a bus, asked if it was going to destination X, and received a curt 'Yup' without so much as a look in my direction. As soon as bus got moving, realised the driver was in fact full of shit, and the bus was going somewhere else. Jumped off the bus at next stop and caught the correct bus. Once again the driver couldn't be bothered to make eye contact, and answered my questions with a single 'Yeah'. Next day I said 'Hello' to a lady working customs in the airport and she looked up in surprise and said 'Whut?!?!'. I repeated a meak 'Hi?', and she then said 'Oh', looked at my passport and then barked 'Next!' at the que. Some lady in the airport overheard me and my brother cracking up in laughter at the sunny disposition of Bostonians, and she said that she (not a native but a resident) had also witnessed people given incorrect info from bus drivers, and opined that it wasn't out of spite but more a life so full and busy that speaking to others was sometimes an unnecessary extravagance.

    Beautiful city though, cheap oysters, and the beer is good. We went to an Italian restaurant, and after our meal me and my brother asked for a Fernet Branca (traditional Italian digestif). The lady looked at us sourly for a few seconds, so we repeated the request. She nodded and shuffled away, and we just started laughing, wondering if the customary Bostonian good nature would result in a drink or the cheque. She came back with two glasses of Fernet Branca that were nearly half-pints! Was difficult to drink that much, but they got the evening off to a cracking start.
    Irish quarter was full of bars, picked one at random and there was a huge birthday celebration going on - was a happy coincidence as it was my birthday. Got very drunk, but had a weird experience of two girls approach us and get talking but on some strange passive-aggressive don't make a pass at me but you're cute where are you from tip that didn't make sense. Flying on a hangover so bad I wanted the plane to crash to put me out of my misery. Stayed with my dad, saw some kin, went on a road-trip to Kentucky, bourbon distillery tours (Buffalo Trace was great, Frankfort town was lovely), got drank, mint julep, steaks, back to Memphis, sunburn in March, discovered Skyrim (my dad loves his XBox + 60 inch tv combo), went to more bars, got more drank, flew home.

    And Man Poo have got it all sewn up. Crappola.


  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    Yay, L*o's back!

    Forget Boston mate, me and A*i are out on the turps tomorrow night, you game?

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    Anyways, the airport exp is ubiquitous and bus drivers are miserable curmudgeons the world over.

    Who wouldn't be, hauling several tonnes of unmanoeuvrable box through traffic and bumpy skreets, and herding the great unwashed around the metropole?

    So did you pole these septic bar skanks?

  • magpaulmagpaul 1,314 Posts
    Of course he did.

    I poasted your inspired joke on my facebook btw, got plenty of abuse.

    Also Skel, random question but plz tell me what you think of the Smashing Pumpkins, not relating to them butchering a Thin Lizzy song one time but more just your general take on their place within 90s rock. Thanks in advance.

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    No idea, don't think I ever consciously heard anything by them. Next!

    So Paul, up for a beer with the druncles?

    And where do you stand on the issue of testy bus drivers?
    We know you and Leo have form in the hoodest transport field.

  • magpaulmagpaul 1,314 Posts
    LOL. Well that solves that riddle.

    I'll get myself up to London one of these days soon, honest.

    I haven't traveled on a bus in several years. However, I can tell you that the conductors on South Eastern rail are usually too pissed to remember if they checked your ticket 5 seconds earlier.

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,889 Posts
    Duderonomy said:
    Just got back from a couple of weeks in teh States

    Cosine all of it, esp. Citeh, going out like Jewely-Us Ceasar. Silva crocked/a shell of his former self, best striker away wi' the fairies.

    I found the States to be friendlier than the UK when you turn up the english accent a notch. Like, in NYC, some bithnith woman practically walked us to the next destination upon being asked the best way to get to it. On the B-side, 'nuff moody stares and mumbles from brotherz keeping it real for me (the wife is some shade of non-white).

    Also, they seem unable to repeat what you didn't understand in anything other than the exact original way you didn't understand it. No slowing down, no explanation. Broken rekkid stance.

    Bus drivers... I cannot concur they are all the same. Scouse ones wanted you to give them a quid (which went straight into their pocket) and walk off up the bus, no ticket, no restrictions on the ride. WIN-WIN. Manc ones the same (I think the preamble was "I haven't got enough, how far can I go for (deposit change and step)). They would tip each other off as to where the inspectors were.

    Bus drivers. INDOMITABLE.

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    I remember some bar in Chicago, suburban south side. I asked for soda water.
    This woman pulls the bulldog/wasp face:
    "sour dough PIZZA??"
    No, so-da war-tah
    "sour da WHEAT???"

    Moved to the next bar.

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,889 Posts
    You can also get that in Scotland, in the more rustic regions (PITLOCHRY I MEAN YOU). They play the game of not wanting to serve Englandman in the "Sorry, I don't understand what you are asking for" stance. I suppose they have to have a break from molesting their kids.

    Other less-dour Scots tell me they have the proper League of Gentleman outlook with everyone.

  • DuderonomyDuderonomy Haut de la Garenne 7,784 Posts
    Have to take pass on London tomorrow. Jet-lagged and get that weird feeling that I'm still on a plane in turbulence every now and then, but would be up for a trip soon enough. Pulling girls in bars: never been good at it. Usually too busy drinking or dancing and rarely take interest very seriously, usually only made aware of missed opportunities by friends telling me that I'm a blind dumb-ass, but I occasionally wind-up with particularly stubborn/drunk ones. And who said opposites attract?
    In my own defence, me & brother had drunk most of a bottle of Maker's Mark between us by this stage of the night.
    The accent did seem to work with American girls though. Not sure why they took so much interest in it, but I can only liken it to my own unexplainable attraction to the French accent. Zut alors!



    What's happened to Spurs? Before the England job spotlight fell on 'Arry, Tottenham were flying. Now down in 4th or is it 5th? How did Citeh drop so many points? Pleasantly surprised about Arsenal, but Van Percy's contract hasn't been signed.

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,889 Posts
    Duderonomy said:
    Van Percy's contract hasn't been signed.

    No, but his taxi to the Etihad is waiting. Soon come.

  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts
    I briefly lived in the same bedsit as a bus driver, dude was like an English version of Otto from the Simpsons. He had two practically indistinguishable Asian girlfriends on the go at the same time and seemed like a happy chappy. Let us ride the bus for free when ever we wanted. Perks of being so highly connected.

  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts
    dubl

  • JuniorJunior 4,853 Posts
    I'd be gutted to see the back of Mario. The man and his antics both on and off the field have been a breath of fresh air this season. I still don't think he's unmanageable either. I Want To Believe.

    It's been such an odd season that I still don't feel comfortable on assuming the title is a done deal though.

    A distant relative of my other half used to be a local bus driver which meant that every time we caught a bus they were driving there was that uncomfortable half chat situation which got worse with every subsequent journey. Was never sure how many times you had to do the fake greeting before it could be done and dusted and you could just pay your fare and settle down next to the man talking to himself in the front seats. Ended up changing bus schedules to avoid it.

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    Driver: "hello A*i mate, how's it going? 'Ere, hope you're looking after my favourite niece, naaaah hahahaha! You'll both have to pop round for Sunday lu-"

    A*i: "Look fella will you just Stfu and drive? I've got a fuckin' migraine and I don't need some noisy c*** who i hardly know in my earole all the way to the shops. Got it? I don't WANT to be your fuckin' mate, ok?"

    Something like that?

  • JuniorJunior 4,853 Posts
    Ha ha! Read like an open book though never any conversation on my part, merely some polite grunts and a look of pain mixed with 'why are you doing this to me? Why can't I be left to listen to my angry urban rhymes of alienation in peace?''.

    So Duder, has your trip stateside had any effect on you considering branching overseas, surly bus drivers n all? It would be the next step in the Strut Brit's global takeover after Skel's dalliances in India, Doc's relocation to Germany and, um, er, Neil's presence in Wales.

  • Junior said:
    and, um, er, Neil's presence in Wales.

    I was, until this morning, gracing Spain with my presence. The friend who dragged me there with promises of good food and good wine in a slow, rural, hillside town is now dead to me. And I never want to hear the word B*nidorm again.

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    Don't forget boy Chizzle's predeliction for all things Irish.

    I think Duder is well suited to an extended American adventure. Maybe aim north as well, Canada.
    He certainly has the wardrobe for it.

    ::brrrreaface::

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    Neil, what's wrong with Benidorm out of high season ?

  • JuniorJunior 4,853 Posts
    neil_something said:
    Junior said:
    and, um, er, Neil's presence in Wales.

    I was, until this morning, gracing Spain with my presence. The friend who dragged me there with promises of good food and good wine in a slow, rural, hillside town is now dead to me. And I never want to hear the word B*nidorm again.

    We need details. Details! Last time I went to Spain was on a last minute pack and dash promised stay "on the outskirts of Gerona". Turned out to be a half built resort on the outskirts of the Costa Brava strip. Was not impressed. Released frustration through slaughter of Gately.

  • magpaulmagpaul 1,314 Posts
    skel said:
    Don't forget boy Chizzle's predeliction for all things Irish.

    what about that dude who made beats for Spiral from Big Brother?!

    I'll be reppin' the Ireland shirt come the Euros don't worry. Darron Gibson on the back.
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