TAKE THAT SHIT TO THE-BRITS.COM

1163164166168169345

  Comments


  • JuniorJunior 4,853 Posts
    skel said:
    Que?
    Must happen. As discussed with Junior, THIS LIFE IS NOT A REHEARSAL, SONS.

    Shit just got mad real bruh. Truth in every word. What's the worst that can happen? 2 days may be the limit though before we start finding out the answer to that question.

    J i m s t e r said:
    Junior said:
    inappropriate touching

    I'd have to be the one doing the touching.


    The key word here is of course "inappropriate". Something defined on a purely subjective level.

    Speaking of which, the various new power stancers who have joined my company recently all seem obsessed with the lingering touch. Both male and female, they seem to believe that an affirmative clasp of the arm or a parental hand left on the shoulder will be the key move that makes me trust, believe, and work overtime for them. I was hoping the whole body physical recoil would have tipped them off that this was not a winning move but sadly no. Am considering next steps to be either a "This is my dance space, this is your dance space" Swayze word in their ear or an aggressive strategy of running up and bear hugging, friendly bottom patting strategy on a daily basis.

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    Haha nice one. Tell 'em about that foppish Mancini/Richard Gere hybrid dude who accosted you outside the pub.
    You were having to fend him off with a shitty stick.

    Ayo.

  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts
    Junior said:
    The key word here is of course "inappropriate". Something defined on a purely subjective level.

    Speaking of which, the various new power stancers who have joined my company recently all seem obsessed with the lingering touch. Both male and female, they seem to believe that an affirmative clasp of the arm or a parental hand left on the shoulder will be the key move that makes me trust, believe, and work overtime for them. I was hoping the whole body physical recoil would have tipped them off that this was not a winning move but sadly no. Am considering next steps to be either a "This is my dance space, this is your dance space" Swayze word in their ear or an aggressive strategy of running up and bear hugging, friendly bottom patting strategy on a daily basis.
    Obviously escalation is the only answer. Maybe reciprocal clasping, either in a kind of overly keen 'where is this heading' way. Or go for the attempt and fail, super awkward hover hand. Then just stare at it with a look of longing and desolation.



    I may not be the best person to be giving advice on human interaction in a business environment.

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,947 Posts
    Stand up, give it a very loud whoop and hold aloft your palm, in eager anticipation of reciprocation of highest of high-fives. When they look at you gone-out, follow with "COME ON! DON'T LEAVE ME HANGING, DOG!"

    b/w

    get a face tattoo.

  • DocMcCoyDocMcCoy "Go and laugh in your own country!" 5,917 Posts
    Okem said:
    Junior said:
    The key word here is of course "inappropriate". Something defined on a purely subjective level.

    Speaking of which, the various new power stancers who have joined my company recently all seem obsessed with the lingering touch. Both male and female, they seem to believe that an affirmative clasp of the arm or a parental hand left on the shoulder will be the key move that makes me trust, believe, and work overtime for them. I was hoping the whole body physical recoil would have tipped them off that this was not a winning move but sadly no. Am considering next steps to be either a "This is my dance space, this is your dance space" Swayze word in their ear or an aggressive strategy of running up and bear hugging, friendly bottom patting strategy on a daily basis.
    Obviously escalation is the only answer. Maybe reciprocal clasping, either in a kind of overly keen 'where is this heading' way. Or go for the attempt and fail, super awkward hover hand. Then just stare at it with a look of longing and desolation.



    I may not be the best person to be giving advice on human interaction in a business environment.

    See, now, I envy those guys. I don't care what that says about me either.

  • FlomotionFlomotion 2,390 Posts


    I'm loving the way the killing machine on the left has steathily put his arm around her for the photo without quite having the courage to actually touch her. Warrior stage right knows his limits.

  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts
    Flomotion said:
    I'm loving the way the killing machine on the left has steathily put his arm around her for the photo without quite having the courage to actually touch her. Warrior stage right knows his limits.
    The beauty of the hover hand.

  • DuderonomyDuderonomy Haut de la Garenne 7,789 Posts
    Maybe it's her. Maybe she's got an invisible field around her*, and that's as close as man can get.



    * Superman nerds will know that it was an invisible force field and not steel skin that made him impervious, so anything is possible. Who is she though?

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    The armpit of his t is definitely touching though, so he'll always have that.

    "one word before the photo guys, DON'T touch the talent"
    Huge mofo in black suit hovering near the scene.
    You knows it.

  • JuniorJunior 4,853 Posts
    skel said:
    Haha nice one. Tell 'em about that foppish Mancini/Richard Gere hybrid dude who accosted you outside the pub.
    You were having to fend him off with a shitty stick.

    Ayo.

    LOL "As seen on TV" S***e, the ladies love him and his sub Grant apologetic posh boy stutter. The silver fox is a low unto himself though thankfully he leans more towards the foppish and forgetful end of things than the wide stance hungry hands approach.

    I think aggressive is the way forward, I'm going all out on fist bumps on Monday.

    Ha ha I love those pics - does anyone have the compilation gif which highlight the highly professional rigor mortis grin the woman maintains through all the photos?

  • JuniorJunior 4,853 Posts
    Thanks for nothing guys. Here you go.


  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts
    Duderonomy said:
    Maybe it's her. Maybe she's got an invisible field around her*, and that's as close as man can get.



    * Superman nerds will know that it was an invisible force field and not steel skin that made him impervious, so anything is possible. Who is she though?
    She be Summer Glau. Deduct 100 points from your sci-fi nerd point card.

    But hover hand is not down to her personal force field. It generally occurs when the opposing forces of hot female meet awkward nerd.

  • el_sparkoel_sparko 884 Posts
    skel said:
    Decided: we need shears bsck, I need a cd of his beats assp

    PM me with your address and i'll get one in the post during the week, you might hate about half of the beats on it (and they will all be oldddddd).

    On a Strut meet-up tip I found out afterwards that I was in the same room as the one Beatnick on Wednesday. I still can't get used to London beer prices, ??5 cans of San Miguel make me cry inside.

  • BrianBrian 7,618 Posts
    thought of you bros when i watched this


  • DORDOR Two Ron Toe 9,902 Posts
    Okem said:
    Duderonomy said:
    Maybe it's her. Maybe she's got an invisible field around her*, and that's as close as man can get.



    * Superman nerds will know that it was an invisible force field and not steel skin that made him impervious, so anything is possible. Who is she though?
    She be Summer Glau. Deduct 100 points from your sci-fi nerd point card.


    To be fair. She did play Supergirl in Superman/Batman: Apocalypse.


    But yeah. River crush for days...


    Side note:
    FA Cup. Who's going on?

  • DuderonomyDuderonomy Haut de la Garenne 7,789 Posts
    DOR said:
    Okem said:
    Duderonomy said:
    Maybe it's her. Maybe she's got an invisible field around her*, and that's as close as man can get.



    * Superman nerds will know that it was an invisible force field and not steel skin that made him impervious, so anything is possible. Who is she though?
    She be Summer Glau. Deduct 100 points from your sci-fi nerd point card.


    To be fair. She did play Supergirl in Superman/Batman: Apocalypse.


    But yeah. River crush for days...

    Not feeling the malnourished look.

    b/w



  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    Just watched P.Crazy's vid.
    Quite good actually, she is so nervous it's almost painful,
    Having done three presentations in the last week I sympathise.
    She talks about "passion", bit of a bugbear, a word sorely debased by its overuse as a currency in the public arena on the likes of BGT, X-Factor and the Apprentice.

    "Lord Sugar, I am really passionate about delivering quality face creams..."

    GTFOOHWTBS

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,947 Posts
    She had me until she started riding Steve Jobs' dick. Yawn. Time to pop a cold one. Is that the time?

    Now I am going to pick up the bass and jam out Cameo's "She's Strange" until I have had my satisfaction.

  • BrianBrian 7,618 Posts
    Yeah, the Steve Jobs thing threw me off too. Would have expected more John Peel talk. Passion is what she's kind of all about though so...

  • JuniorJunior 4,853 Posts
    Just googled this TEDx group and yeah I would imagine that she got given the Passion theme for fifteen minutes before they all then went and had a brainstorming session on it with some awesome pivot charts. Having been to a few of these on a slightly chavvier scale I am amazed that companies still pay big money for these pointless celebrity chats which have absolutely no relation to business.

    Having said that, I like MAH and thought the first bit about starting up was interesting in itself as well as her personal reasons for leaving Radio 1. Lost me with the Jobs and the final bit sounded like she's just been making Crib notes from Lil B's NYU talk.

    God damn she was nervous though, was mentally willing her to sit down and take a deep breath.

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    Junior said:
    a brainstorming session .

    We have the term banned at work now, apparently too close for comfort for epileptics in describing their seizure experience.
    We now have to call it a "mind shower".

    I kid you not.

  • JuniorJunior 4,853 Posts
    LOL, dear lord. Surely a mind shower is equally offensive to people who have suffered from water on the brain?

    I'm curious how offended people suffering from epilepsy were on a daily basis.

    Our current management is obsessed with "pieces" and "spaces" and I heard someone actually use the "raise a flag and see who salutes it" the other day. I need to start making crib notes from the Apprentice to compete.

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,947 Posts
    Junior said:
    raise a flag and see who salutes it

    Been rocking that since time. Actually mine is "Let's run it up the flagpole and see who salutes". You can action that one, mate.

    My other fave for dismissing the input of others, is to interrupt with "Moving forward [pause], I think we should ..."

    Goal being to delegate off all daytime activity to freeup Strut time.

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    Here's some for you

    Reach out to...
    Defend the domain
    We haven't got the bandwidth
    White space
    Across the whole piece
    Delivery is our currency
    Federate it across the area
    Persist the data throughout...
    Dollar saved? Dollar earned
    Future state
    Product agnostic
    Life cycle management
    What's your global stripe?
    We need a B-Hag. A big, hairy audacious goal.

    ::B-face::

  • JuniorJunior 4,853 Posts
    J i m s t e r said:
    Junior said:
    raise a flag and see who salutes it

    Been rocking that since time. Actually mine is "Let's run it up the flagpole and see who salutes". You can action that one, mate.


    Ah yes, I stand corrected Jimster. You see, so bad at this I can't even get it right second hand.


    skel said:

    We need a B-Hag. A big, hairy audacious goal.

    :face_melt: I'm going to ran that up the flagpole in meetings today.

    Also, low-hanging fruit and, my personal bugbear, "Washes its own face".

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,947 Posts
    Apropos of nothing, I noticed that "She's Strange" features the word "Facetious".

    Anyone else know of another song with this in it? Surely Mozzer / Lloyd Cole headz will rep?



    Fwd to 3:40 for the goodness. Bassplayer, Horns and Keboard/Hair dude are keystones in Outkast's live setup. You got to love that MusicMan Stingray bass sound. Sew hill.

  • J i m s t e r said:
    Apropos of nothing, I noticed that "She's Strange" features the word "Facetious".

    Anyone else know of another song with this in it? Surely Mozzer / Lloyd Cole headz will rep?



    gets bonus points for rhyming it with "jesus".

  • skel said:
    Here's some for you

    Reach out to...
    Defend the domain
    We haven't got the bandwidth
    White space
    Across the whole piece
    Delivery is our currency
    Federate it across the area
    Persist the data throughout...
    Dollar saved? Dollar earned
    Future state
    Product agnostic
    Life cycle management
    What's your global stripe?
    We need a B-Hag. A big, hairy audacious goal.

    ::B-face::

    Low-hanging fruit
    These are good problems to have
    Cradle to grave
    Womb to tomb
    Feather in your cap
    Pick your battles
    Know your audience

  • FlomotionFlomotion 2,390 Posts
    "Thanks for reaching out."

    This one. Maybe most irritating and dismissive phrase ever conceived. Lost it last week during a face to face with a bod at a well known social network who merrily chirped this at the end of a meeting regarding their utter f***wittedness.

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    In a world where reaching out gets you up the 'value chain', the chimpanzee is king.

    Always my riposte, but only to juniors.

    Talking of which, I see Junior the horse fell at the second.
Sign In or Register to comment.