Rihanna working with Chris Brown

bassiebassie 11,710 Posts
edited March 2012 in Strut Central
We went through it on the Board when it all first blew up, so what are SStrut???s thoughts on this?
Putting aside the music, but taking into consideration the mainstream stardom aspect and that millions of young men and women are watching how these two move???

Is she sending a terrible message by ???going back??? to her abuser?
Is she sending a positive message about overcoming and forgiveness?
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  Comments


  • I can't help but think this is an awful example. That said it mirrors mundane reality in that the most abused women return to their abuser...

  • JRootJRoot 861 Posts
    From a role model perspective, this is probably not a good look absent some strong evidence that Chris Brown has abandoned violence as a tool to resolve interpersonal disputes.

    From a music perspective, it could be good. America will forgive even the most grievous errors in judgment as long as the artist subsequently releases some bangers (see R. Kelly). I will reserve further judgment until I hear the results.

    Peace,
    JRoot

  • DJ_EnkiDJ_Enki 6,473 Posts
    JRoot said:
    From a role model perspective, this is probably not a good look absent some strong evidence that Chris Brown has abandoned violence as a tool to resolve interpersonal disputes.

    From a music perspective, it could be good. America will forgive even the most grievous errors in judgment as long as the artist subsequently releases some bangers (see R. Kelly). I will reserve further judgment until I hear the results.

    Peace,
    JRoot

    From a PR perspective, it's pure gold.

  • jamesjames chicago 1,863 Posts
    JRoot said:
    America will forgive even the most grievous errors in judgment as long as the artist subsequently releases some bangers (see R. Kelly).
    I'll be interested to see whether America's perspective is different when both abuser and abused are commercially viable artists operating in the same sphere. I can't really think of a precedent for that.

    Ultimately, though, shit will probably not be that different. I predict lots of, "Hey, if she's not bothered by it, why should I be?", followed by chart success, diminishing at a rate no better or worse than typical. Anybody who gets too agitated by it will accused of "shaming," discourse will eventually smooth the whole thing out into this year's "No, see, you've got it all wrong: stripping empowers women," and I will have to choke back a little more bile than usual whenever I hear her joyless-as-always voice on the radio. Other than that, meh.

    I was talking with my friend Jackie about this, and while she believes this will be a strong warm-weather black-folks-barbecue topic, she doesn't see it being a perennial, a la Kells or Michael. She thinks the parties involved are too poppy and too young to retain traction among "my people."

  • dj_cityboydj_cityboy 1,477 Posts
    keep your friends close and your enemies closer-r?

  • batmonbatmon 27,574 Posts
    I hatt them both.

  • knewjakknewjak 1,231 Posts
    fucking sad

  • bassiebassie 11,710 Posts
    I can see them getting back together.

  • pcmrpcmr 5,591 Posts
    what bothers me is the severity of the assault and the unrepentant attitude of the abuser.
    he's avoided financial/PR consequences and now basically is off the hook completely
    working with many HS students i heard a lot of ''she deserved it, she was drunk and looking for it''
    i guess these impressionable young female brown fans are vindicated
    i hatt them both

  • p_gunnp_gunn 2,284 Posts
    pcmr said:
    what bothers me is the severity of the assault and the unrepentant attitude of the abuser.
    he's avoided financial/PR consequences and now basically is off the hook completely
    working with many HS students i heard a lot of ''she deserved it, she was drunk and looking for it''
    i guess these impressionable young female brown fans are vindicated
    i hatt them both

    yup...

    remember when he freaked out and trashed the Today Show last year... dude still has anger issues...

  • DeegreezDeegreez 804 Posts
    Her working with him again took the strength of any message that could have been taught to her young fans from this public experience and relegated the collective memory and context of the whole event into just some drama that went down. It belittles it. Hatt them both.

  • bassiebassie 11,710 Posts
    I know folks think it???s an easy call to know what to do in an abusive relationship. It???s complicated and conflicted to say the least???yes, even for the rich and famous.

    This is a working relationship, right? I can only take it at its face-value right now and say it is a business decision.
    It would be a different ballgame in a whole other field were they to get back together.

    I think there has to be room for people to f up and fix it. Having anger issues is definitely not something one can learn to control overnight. And I don???t know how unrepentant he has or hasn???t been ??? does he owe the world an apology and updates on his progress? Yea, I get they are public figures, but this is something a person needs to work on in private.
    I in no way think he should get a pass, but I am also glad he hasn???t been castrated like Tiger Woods. (Had Rihanna been white - this would be such a different conversation)

    It makes me uneasy to hear women say she is ???betraying??? abused women everywhere.
    It also makes me uneasy to hear young women fawn over him and demonize her.
    But these two aren???t solely responsible for the messed up messages we send out regarding male-female relationships???they???re probably a product of it to some extent.

  • pcmrpcmr 5,591 Posts
    i hear you
    but there are different ways to make up and forgive
    riri the rolemodel and the person could have made the same logical decision to not embrace him again
    it seems that financial reasoning trumped it

  • bassiebassie 11,710 Posts
    mistake

  • Controller_7Controller_7 4,052 Posts
    Wait, what's the big deal? It's not like he punched her in the face and bit her or anything...

    Oh wait.

    Even if wounds heal and she's moved on, she probably should have taken a stance and just cut ties. That said, who knows what's going on in her head. I read some interview in rolling stone and she talks about watching that movie Due Date over and over, like she watches it daily. That's not normal.

  • batmonbatmon 27,574 Posts
    Can one forgive someone for getting punched in the face?

  • bassiebassie 11,710 Posts
    In a case like this, I don't think I could, but people's capacity for forgiveness - and for much greater injustices than this - never ceases to amaze me.

    I guess it's that philosophy that once you forgive, you are free of it. Sounds waaaaaay easier said than done.
    I'm still pissed at someone taking credit for work I did last year!

    edit - If forgiveness is for one's own self-preservation, then I would also wonder how you can trust that person again?

  • ReynaldoReynaldo 6,054 Posts
    They're a perfect match. Let 'em live. They'd only be trouble for a well-adjusted partner. She doesn't need to be saved from herself.

  • jjfad027jjfad027 1,594 Posts





  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,954 Posts
    batmon said:
    Can one forgive someone for getting punched in the face?

    In Barbados, could be foreplay...

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,954 Posts
    Not to be flippant, but IIRC her fam is all f*cked up so it may not be the trauma to her that it would be to a gal whose life-path has been smoother than a nun's soap.

  • dj_cityboydj_cityboy 1,477 Posts
    as far as i am concerned he can mess up all he likes and try to get as much help as he can, but that will never take away the scrutiny he will be up against for the rest of his life for laying his hands on her...and even if Rihanna still has goo-goo eyes for chris brown the public will continue to hate on him even if shes gotten past the whole ordeal...

  • DocMcCoyDocMcCoy "Go and laugh in your own country!" 5,917 Posts
    bassie said:
    We went through it on the Board when it all first blew up, so what are SStrut???s thoughts on this?
    Putting aside the music, but taking into consideration the mainstream stardom aspect and that millions of young men and women are watching how these two move???

    Is she sending a terrible message by ???going back??? to her abuser?
    Is she sending a positive message about overcoming and forgiveness?

    The former. Rihanna's an idiot. Apart from the fact they've supposedly stayed involved on the DL anyway, it just validates all that "I'd let Chris Brown smack the shit outta me" crap that was all over Twitter when he was on the Grammys. And don't get me started on that shitstack Grammys spokesperson who claimed the show had been a victim of the whole furore because they weren't able to put him on the show without catching flak until this year. Seriously. That was an official Grammy statement. I'm aware that domestic violence can be a complex issue, and that simply turning your back on your abuser and walking away isn't always easy. But it's a lot easier for someone in Rihanna's position than it is for most women who are being brutalised by their partners. I really did think she was brighter than this. The entire affair has been a magnet for the worst sort of stupidity and dim-bulb commentary. Chris Brown's a fucking toerag, and if there was any justice in the world he'd live in fear of a good shoeing every time he stepped out of his house. Fuck him.

  • bassiebassie 11,710 Posts
    DocMcCoy said:
    bassie said:
    We went through it on the Board when it all first blew up, so what are SStrut???s thoughts on this?
    Putting aside the music, but taking into consideration the mainstream stardom aspect and that millions of young men and women are watching how these two move???

    Is she sending a terrible message by ???going back??? to her abuser?
    Is she sending a positive message about overcoming and forgiveness?

    The former. Rihanna's an idiot. Apart from the fact they've supposedly stayed involved on the DL anyway, it just validates all that "I'd let Chris Brown smack the shit outta me" crap that was all over Twitter when he was on the Grammys. And don't get me started on that shitstack Grammys spokesperson who claimed the show had been a victim of the whole furore because they weren't able to put him on the show without catching flak until this year. Seriously. That was an official Grammy statement. I'm aware that domestic violence can be a complex issue, and that simply turning your back on your abuser and walking away isn't always easy. But it's a lot easier for someone in Rihanna's position than it is for most women who are being brutalised by their partners. I really did think she was brighter than this. The entire affair has been a magnet for the worst sort of stupidity and dim-bulb commentary. Chris Brown's a fucking toerag, and if there was any justice in the world he'd live in fear of a good shoeing every time he stepped out of his house. Fuck him.

    Assuming Rihanna is of a certain mindset and with a specific lifeplan.
    I don't even disagree with anything you have said, but I am trying to keep some perspective. My gut reaction is to have a gut reaction.
    She is 24 years old. It is not an age of absolutes and life answers.
    That said, she knows wtf she's doing, and I think she knows to some extent, it's a fucking cop-out.

  • AlmondAlmond 1,427 Posts
    I can't help but assume that this is little "relationship" is at least partially something concocted by Rihanna and Chris' publicity teams. I remember Rihanna gave some big ABC interview about how vile the incident was, saying "fuck love," and she even filmed a music video in which she shot and killed a man for sexually assaulting her (Man Down).

    On the one hand, she wants us to know that she's a survivor, a strong woman of color. On the other hand is this perplexing return to what many thought were bygones. Maybe she's trying to reinforce this bad girl image she's been trying so hard to keep up. I can accept dancing on the edge via substance abuse or gambling or something, but domestic abuse? It's so not glamourous. With every single of hers getting constant airplay on the radio, she's not in a position to lose much popularity any time soon. But Brown has way more to gain by trying to paint himself as the nice guy again.

    But hey, it's got us talking about two singers very few on this board even enjoy listening to.

  • staxwaxstaxwax 1,474 Posts

  • DocMcCoyDocMcCoy "Go and laugh in your own country!" 5,917 Posts

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,954 Posts
    DocMcCoy said:

    Sayin'.

    As a whole, one of the worst looks ever.

    Imagine the shoes.

  • bassiebassie 11,710 Posts
    Holy shit.

    On a regular non-assault-history day, this would just be a horrible decision gone terribly wrong.

    But I am kinda floored at how negligent his team/crew/handlers/mans dem are to let this pass.

  • dayday 9,611 Posts
    DocMcCoy said:

    It's like someone threw him in a dryer filled with spirit gum and pubes.
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