TAKE THAT SHIT TO THE-BRITS.COM

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  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts
    2005 MLS All Stars 4???1 England Fulham Columbus Crew Stadium Columbus, Ohio 23,309^
    2006 MLS All Stars 1???0 England Chelsea Toyota Park Bridgeview, Illinois 21,210^
    2007 MLS All Stars 2???0 Scotland Celtic Dick's Sporting Goods Park Commerce City, Colorado 18,661^[6]
    2008 MLS All Stars 3???2 England West Ham United BMO Field Toronto, Ontario 20,844^
    2009 MLS All Stars 1???1* England Everton Rio Tinto Stadium Sandy, Utah 20,124^
    2010 MLS All Stars 2???5 England Manchester United Reliant Stadium Houston, Texas 70,728^

    You can beat the 'All Stars' but you couldn't beat 'The Wizards'. (Who I was v disappointed to find out don't play in capes. Or robes, or tinkling bell. No wands and no weaving of spells, Fluffliato Greeno. What kind of fucking Wizards are they?)


  • JuniorJunior 4,853 Posts
    We'd beat All Stars anyday of the week but a manager as wise and experienced as Fergie knows better than to fuck with Wizards in a pre-season friendly. Dark magic son, dark magic.



    B/W


  • magpaulmagpaul 1,314 Posts
    This ain't no Wizard of Oz shit neither.

  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts
    W I Z A R D

  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts
    bloodninja: Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?

    DFletcher: Aight.

    bloodninja: Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.

    DFletcher: I slip out of my pants, just for you, bloodninja.

    bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.

    DFletcher: Oh, I like to play dress up.

    bloodninja: Me too baby.

    DFletcher: I kiss you softly on your chest.

    bloodninja: I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.

    DFletcher: Hey...

    bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 Cock of the Infinite.

    DFletcher: Funny I still don't see it.

    bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty F*ck of the Beyondness.

    DFletcher: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.

    bloodninja: Don't f*ck with me bitch, I'm the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.

    bloodninja: I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl. 2 Druid.

    DFletcher: Don't ever message me again you piece of ****.

    bloodninja: Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.

    bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik's evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.

    bloodninja: You still there baby? I think it's getting hard now.

    bloodninja: Baby?

  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts


    vs


  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts


    vs


  • JuniorJunior 4,853 Posts
    Very little fucks with The Savage Wizard. Power Glove for teh win every time.

    I remember renting the full length version of this out with my childhood friends with the expectations of great family fun. Did not really deliver on that front though would no doubt a more rewarding experience 25 years later.



    Obligatory vs


  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts
    Can't let the page pass without a wizards sleeve joke.

  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts

  • JuniorJunior 4,853 Posts
    :beerbang:

    I don't know though, those guys look a bit Warlocky for my liking.

  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts

  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts
    Paul said:
    This ain't no Wizard of Oz shit neither.


  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts

  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts


    Very Paul Scoles like. (complete with the dodgy tackling)

  • magpaulmagpaul 1,314 Posts
    We need more threads like this

  • JuniorJunior 4,853 Posts
    Ha ha epic drama. Add another point to the campaign to bring back Locs so I can stick this in there:

    so the cats come and start meowing he says dont worry youl be fed once i finish with this guy

  • magpaulmagpaul 1,314 Posts
    After reading that, I'll make sure to not go for a post-pub blaze round the house of anyone who has been crucified in Iraq.

  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts
    I think if you enter the world of the committed alcoholic you'll soon enough end up with a story like this. A friend of mine, who spent most of 2001 in what I like to refer to as 'Tramp Training', had a few similarly wild stories.
    One time a fellow drinker invited him back to his place with the lure of whiskey, before regaling him with the story of how he and a friend had, only last week, had a three way with a girl with only one leg. Then, with immense pride, he produces a video recording of said event and they proceed to watch it. (the mind boggles at the horrors contained in that video)

  • JuniorJunior 4,853 Posts
    Yeah I must confess that the story did dreg up some none to pleasant memories from my pre mobile teenage days of jumping in cabs with friends after pubs and ending up in some god forsaken hell hole with no idea where I was or how to get home. The next few hours would be spent trying to avoid being left alone with any of the smelly weirdos who appeared to squat there while not sitting on anything that squelched or make eye contact with the guy with the thousand mile stare sitting in the corner surveying the room silently.

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,894 Posts
    Okem said:
    ...he and a friend had, only last week, had a three way with a girl with only one leg.

    Come on, we've all done it.

  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts
    J i m s t e r said:
    Okem said:
    ...he and a friend had, only last week, had a three way with a girl with only one leg.

    Come on, we've all done it.


  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,894 Posts
    J i m s t e r said:
    Okem said:
    ...he and a friend had, only last week, had a three way with a girl with only one leg.

    Come on, we've all done it.

    DP or Spitroast?

  • pcmrpcmr 5,591 Posts
    anderson crunken accident
    good job lad!

  • magpaulmagpaul 1,314 Posts
    His cruciate ligament injury means it'll be ages till he actually plays again. I'm gonna maintain the Ando-watch as I still misguidedly believe he can come good. After all, O'Shea tipped him for greatness based on how he does in training.. and there have been the occasional glimpses of quality in matches too.

    As an unnamed source at the club reckoned 'hopefully it'll knock some sense into him'.


  • DocMcCoyDocMcCoy "Go and laugh in your own country!" 5,913 Posts
    I don't imagine Duder is going to like this too much.


  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts
    I don't really get it.. was that even funny?


  • DocMcCoyDocMcCoy "Go and laugh in your own country!" 5,913 Posts


    Everybody Huang Chung Tonight, You'll Never Wok Alone, Red China, etc., etc.

  • DORDOR Two Ron Toe 9,899 Posts
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