Also @ UC Berkeley, circa 1995, at the Wheeler Hall bathrooms.
So I leave Poli Sci. 1 with Professor Jowitt to take a piss but the urinals were all broken/occupied. Naturally, I go to a stall. As I stand there, relieving myself, I sensed something was amiss. You know, like you can feel someone watching you. Anyway, I glance to my right and saw that there is an quarter-sized hole exactly at my crotch level in the stall wall. And yup, you guessed it, the hole was filled up with someone's eyeball. I was horrified: THEY WERE WATCHING ME PEE!! But I had a moment of brilliance: instead of stopping peeing, I just changed the direction and trajectory of my pee stream to hit the hole. BULLSEYE! There was a yelp from the neighboring stall. I then started yelling and kicking the wall. I exitted the stall and kicked the perv's stall door and shouted "Fucking Perv" at the top of my lungs. I got out of there quickly and didn't look back. I didn't want to know who it was, I just wanted to leave.
I was so disgusted and violated that I am pretty sure I didn't stop to wash.
I also think I left class and went and had a drink. It was a 9:30 am class.
the most disturbinglyest thing for me one time at Nickies in SF the guy's bathroom was like 1/4" deep in piss and overflow, I'm talking extra foul, public health prob foul. by the end of the night it was running on to the main floor outside, and the ladies' was unisex for the rest of the night (ladies were not pleased). you heard just way too many sneakers squeaking on the dancefloor, it was ill.
BUT THE DJ KILLED IT WITH CLASSICS!
Oh, man...one of the worst things about DJing at Nickie's was that the booth shared a wall with the men's room--a very thin wall that was apparently quite porous. Every night, somebody would get comfy in the men's room, effectively bombing the booth.
I didn't see the following (thank you, God--it really is the little things), but the following was recently relayed to me:
There's a gay bar here in SF--I know, what are the odds?--that does a big beer bust on Sundays. Dude's are at the trough, havin' a wazz, and a guy strolls in, stoops down, and drink's dudes' piss-stream straight from the source.
*shiver*
on tap all night. yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeow.
hey speak of the devil man - got slump2 in the mail 30 minutes ago, it's in now, track 4 mac dre and buildin'...FIRST BEER OF THE WEEKEND AND FRESH MIX CD = BULLETPROOF
Also @ UC Berkeley, circa 1995, at the Wheeler Hall bathrooms.
So I leave Poli Sci. 1 with Professor Jowitt to take a piss but the urinals were all broken/occupied. Naturally, I go to a stall. As I stand there, relieving myself, I sensed something was amiss. You know, like you can feel someone watching you. Anyway, I glance to my right and saw that there is an quarter-sized hole exactly at my crotch level in the stall wall. And yup, you guessed it, the hole was filled up with someone's eyeball. I was horrified: THEY WERE WATCHING ME PEE!! But I had a moment of brilliance: instead of stopping peeing, I just changed the direction and trajectory of my pee stream to hit the hole. BULLSEYE! There was a yelp from the neighboring stall. I then started yelling and kicking the wall. I exitted the stall and kicked the perv's stall door and shouted "Fucking Perv" at the top of my lungs. I got out of there quickly and didn't look back. I didn't want to know who it was, I just wanted to leave.
I was so disgusted and violated that I am pretty sure I didn't stop to wash.
I also think I left class and went and had a drink. It was a 9:30 am class.
When I was in middle school we had a program to integrate mentally challenged kids into the main school classes, which was actually really cool because it's had a lasting impact on people's impressions of those with serious mental deficiencies, but here's the story...
I walked in to one of the bathrooms that was a little off the beaten path and one of the kids, a big, pale gumpy looking fellow (with MY NAME) is lying on the tile floor, pants undone moaning and jerking off right in front of me! As soon as he realized that someone saw him, he shuffled up off of the floor mumbling "I'm sorry..." and locked himself in a stall. Whew.
when i went to gw, there was, no joke, an undercover sting operation on dudes soliciting other dudes in the bathrooms. this was in the campus paper. a couple days after it came out, i was in one of the restrooms and heard two guys going at it.
on a separate occasion, i was taking a wizz, looked up at the writing on the wall, and it read, "if you're looking for a joke, it's in your hand." i felt shame
Oh - has anyone else walked into a stall only to see poo smeared on the toilet seat?
Why would actually either catch the terd mid-fall and use it like a Crayon OR hover above and askew of the seat so that the terd lands on it???
THE QUESTIONS.
i hear story after story of how gross men's bathrooms are. what's the hell?
Ladies room's don't exactly smell like roses, or do they?
Moms has tried to get through stories of hearing massive farts in the stalls without laughing hard enough for me to just have to call her back later, but damn, real dudez wanna know the dealz.
My best friend and I slept in his car one night in Compton (long story). The next morning I had to pee really bad, I got up and walked into a gas station bathroom. There I stand. Man in hand. At the stall. Some rather large (I'm 6'5", this dude was bigger than me) gentleman comes in and occupies the urinal next to me.
All of a sudden he leans his head over the divider between his urinal and mine, looks down at my dick, and says, "You got a rod stuck through there, man?" I kinda look at him like, well, yea. He hollers to his homie, "Yo, come check this out, guy's got an earring in his dick!"
Some other dude walks in and takes a gander at my mander.
After years of listening to gangsta rap I was sure I was about to be killed, or shot, or stabbed, or robbed. I mean, here I was, a white dude in a Compton bathroom with my pants open and two Brothers looking at my dick...
Finally the first dude says, "That's some crazy shit" and gives me a pound (hands unwashed). I walk back to my friend's car feeling like I just solved the race issue in America...
Anyone else waiting for those two dudes from Compton to pop in here and post their version of Bam's story as the most distubring thing they've seen in a public bathroom?
My best friend and I slept in his car one night in Compton (long story). The next morning I had to pee really bad, I got up and walked into a gas station bathroom. There I stand. Man in hand. At the stall. Some rather large (I'm 6'5", this dude was bigger than me) gentleman comes in and occupies the urinal next to me.
All of a sudden he leans his head over the divider between his urinal and mine, looks down at my dick, and says, "You got a rod stuck through there, man?" I kinda look at him like, well, yea. He hollers to his homie, "Yo, come check this out, guy's got an earring in his dick!"
Some other dude walks in and takes a gander at my mander.
After years of listening to gangsta rap I was sure I was about to be killed, or shot, or stabbed, or robbed. I mean, here I was, a white dude in a Compton bathroom with my pants open and two Brothers looking at my dick...
Finally the first dude says, "That's some crazy shit" and gives me a pound (hands unwashed). I walk back to my friend's car feeling like I just solved the race issue in America...
Anyone else waiting for those two dudes from Compton to pop in here and post their version of Bam's story as the most distubring thing they've seen in a public bathroom?
Anyone else waiting for those two dudes from Compton to pop in here and post their version of Bam's story as the most distubring thing they've seen in a public bathroom?
yes. with baited breath. as an aside, Bam, you could have started an "Obscure ways of contracting STDs" thread with this story. Unwashed pound? That totally violates the rules of pounding propriety.
I knew another dude who told me had his sh*t pierced. Dude said he had a thick ring in the urethra that curls up and either right into or just past the head.
I knew another dude who told me had his sh*t pierced. Dude said he had a thick ring in the urethra that curls up and either right into or just past the head.
Man, you guys have some bugged out stories! I don't know how mine compares, and I'll probably regret posting this but it's Friday, wtf...
Back in like '96 or so, my cousin and I were driving back home to the Bay Area from a trip to Vegas, I think. We were still a few hours from home and essentially in the middle of nowehere. I had to piss sooo bad, it wasn't even funny. I had been holding it for nearly an hour and meant to tell my cousin to pull over somewhere but dosed off. I woke up from my power nap startled as hell and paranoid -- it felt like someone had a knife to my bladder. So I tell my cousin "yo, I gotta go to the bathroom, man!" and immediately we see a sign for a rest stop that's coming up. Man, we pull up to this motherf*cker and I should have known something was gonna go down. First off, there's mad truckers parked in the lot and an absurd amount of random folks just loitering (resting) about. Plus, keep in mind, it was something like 1:00 in the morning...
So I bounce out of the car and jet to the restroom. I think the urinals were full so I had to go into one of the stalls. I'm in there going to the bathroom and there's some pretty suspect noises coming from the stall next to me. I listen for a few seconds more while I finish going to the bathroom, and it becomes apparent that this guy is whacking off right there in the stall! I couldn't believe this shit. I was like "fuck this, I'm out!" So I go out of the stall and head to the sink to wash up. I proceed to do so and I hear this loud noise from that dude in the stall -- which happens to be the closest one to me on the right -- I look over in that direction and this dirty-ass fool is literally on his knees with his dick coming out from under the stall. I didn't expect to see no shit like that and I ran my ass off getting back to the car. I felt so dirty just by being there, I don't even think I told my cousin what happened. It was fucked up.
Stay away from rest stop bathrooms. "They're the bathhouse of the '90s."
i was at a club with a pretty gross bathroom a couple years ago, just minding my business at the urinal... i heard the main door open and close, then the stall door close and lock... immediately, i hear a girl saying "FUCK ME IN THE ASS" and all kinds of shit like that, real loud... the dude was absolutely laying into it, too... it was terrible... i was trying to like push my piss out faster so i could get the fuck out of there... so i go back out and told my friends what was going on, and one of them went in there, turned the sink on, cupped his hands, and started throwing water over the wall on them... we were all in the doorway laughing our ass off... then the stall door opens, and the dude comes out, pants around his ankles with a boner, and yells "FUCKING CHILL OUT, GROW UP MOTHERFUCKERS!"... they came out a little while later, and the girl was huge!... she looked like mimi on the drew carrey show... we were rolling laughing... they spent the rest of the night grinding on each other on the dance floor... it was the epitome of not a good look
I mean, here I was, a white dude in a Compton bathroom with my pants open and two Brothers looking at my dick...
would it be wrong of me to use this as a location?
Shit. I only posted that story 'cause I read Raj's thread and thought the board was about to crash. I was duped. I want my privacy back!
I knew another dude who told me had his sh*t pierced. Dude said he had a thick ring in the urethra that curls up and either right into or just past the head.
I was straight like
D,
That particular piercing is called a "Prince Albert" and is the least painful of them. The urethra runs along the bottom of the penis, so the piercing only penetrates a thin layer of skin.
The one I was referring to is called an "Ampallang," which goes sideways right through the head. Like, over an inch of nerve endings and skin. Google that shit. (The funniest thing is, when you get the piercing they have to pick a rod that is the appropriate length. So they mark where the needle will penetrate, then give you a pair of calipers and ask you to go in the bathroom and get yourself erect, then measure the distance between the two points. It's funny to be sitting in the waiting room and see dudes come out of the bathroom holding this pair of calipers all self-conscious like....)
Coincidentally, as a Christmas present to that same friend whose car I slept in, I paid for his Prince Albert.
And yes, I took pictures.
If you dare, and want to check out my best friend's dick (with a little blood) fresh after he had a needle rammed through it, click here.
Some years later he had it taken out. (You have to pee sitting down, or hold your dick upside down, otherwise you get piss all over your shoes.) He told me his ex-girlfriend asked if she could have the ring! I guess she had good memories. If you can imagine trying to get that huge ring into a condom. But, it makes the head of your dick feeeeeel twice as big.
1978 - The Mens Room at the Omni during an Outlaws/Foghat concert. Huge lines to piss during the intermission so this guy in the (packed) line says "fuck this" pulls out his dick and just starts pissing in the line. I believe the sinks were overflowing with piss at that point as well (this happened at most arena rock shows in the 70s unfortunately).
1982 - Hard Rock Cafe in Amsterdam. Walked in on two guys shooting up.
stopped at a gas station near tyson's corner once to see if i could use the restroom because i really had to go. so i ask the attendent if they have a public restroom and he says "you can try to use it." puzzled by what he meant i went out to the bathroom to find a toilet which had maybe three feet of poo piled up out of the bowl just chilling. i can understand a toilet who's bowl is filled with poo but three feet or so past that point is just a little "wtf"
Some friends and I were leaving a club a few months ago and were on our way to the car. So we're walking through the parking lot cracking jokes, and I look to my right and my friend who's talking to me has his shit out and is pissing while he's walking.
We all start clowning when a car hits their lights on right as he's walking in front of them. Dude doesn't even bat an eye and just keeps going (where's the "gully" graemlin?). We were rolling!
stopped at a gas station near tyson's corner once to see if i could use the restroom because i really had to go. so i ask the attendent if they have a public restroom and he says "you can try to use it." puzzled by what he meant i went out to the bathroom to find a toilet which had maybe three feet of poo piled up out of the bowl just chilling. i can understand a toilet who's bowl is filled with poo but three feet or so past that point is just a little "wtf"
haha, ive experienced this shit in port-a-potties..
first day of high school I walk into to take a piss and one the mentally challenged kids has his pants around his ankles and is just pissing all over the wall. I walked straight out with a new found respect for high school.
I use to work in a gastation during high school also. We had this dude who liked to steal our toilet paper after he threw his own shit all over the walls in the bathroom. We'd kick him out but evertime some newjack started working he'd get in there and fuck it up so the rule was who ever let him shit had to clean it.
In college we had only one shower stall that stayed hot the entire time you took a shower. The other stalls went cold after 2 minutes. One weekend while the cleaning staff was away, some mysterious shitter drops a deuce in the good shower. I couldn't believe it. Out off all the bathroom stalls in the dorm it had to be the good one. I did what I had to do. I'm not proud but I got a pizza box lid a scooped it up droped in the toilet. Turned the shower on hot let in run 5 minutes then showered up. Disturbing yes, but thank god it was a solid poo. I'm sure I have many more disturbing bathroom memories but that one was the first one that I thought of.
I've witnessed the "Shopping Bag Trick" first hand in a public bathroom at Penn Station in NY. Two guys went into the toilet stall with a shopping back. One guy sat on the bowl(I could see his feet) while the second guy stood in the shopping bag so it would not appear there were two people in the stall. The sounds that came from the stall could only suggest that shopping bag man was getting his dick sucked.
I used to work at Barnes and Noble and one day I went in our bathrooms to take a piss and I hear some shit...I can see mad magazines sticking out from under a stall....So I'm like fuck I aint gonna say shit to this dude what the hell do you say "UHMM Hey like finish up...and get out!" fuck that...any way like 15 minutes later a co worker goes in and dude is still in there... so my barley 5ft. female korean manager goes in the mens room and starts yelling hella loud.."I know what you are doing and I'm calling the cops." Out walks a kid that couldn't be more than 13..with hella random mags..like Playboy , MAaxim and then like Toy enthusiest mags and shit...pretty fucked considering those mags made their way back on the racks.
When I was in middle school we had a program to integrate mentally challenged kids into the main school classes, which was actually really cool because it's had a lasting impact on people's impressions of those with serious mental deficiencies, but here's the story...
I walked in to one of the bathrooms that was a little off the beaten path and one of the kids, a big, pale gumpy looking fellow (with MY NAME) is lying on the tile floor, pants undone moaning and jerking off right in front of me! As soon as he realized that someone saw him, he shuffled up off of the floor mumbling "I'm sorry..." and locked himself in a stall. Whew.
My buddy ran into a "challenged" guy in his thirties doing the same thing at a public pool restroom. The only thing that is different was he didn't stop or go into a stall. My buddy was shocked and didn't say anything. That what sucks in situations like that because they are so bizarre that you can't say anything. I would of said "hey buddy, wrap it up or get a stall"
Comments
So I leave Poli Sci. 1 with Professor Jowitt to take a piss but the urinals were all broken/occupied. Naturally, I go to a stall. As I stand there, relieving myself, I sensed something was amiss. You know, like you can feel someone watching you. Anyway, I glance to my right and saw that there is an quarter-sized hole exactly at my crotch level in the stall wall. And yup, you guessed it, the hole was filled up with someone's eyeball. I was horrified: THEY WERE WATCHING ME PEE!! But I had a moment of brilliance: instead of stopping peeing, I just changed the direction and trajectory of my pee stream to hit the hole. BULLSEYE! There was a yelp from the neighboring stall. I then started yelling and kicking the wall. I exitted the stall and kicked the perv's stall door and shouted "Fucking Perv" at the top of my lungs. I got out of there quickly and didn't look back. I didn't want to know who it was, I just wanted to leave.
I was so disgusted and violated that I am pretty sure I didn't stop to wash.
I also think I left class and went and had a drink. It was a 9:30 am class.
~gNAT
on tap all night. yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeow.
hey speak of the devil man - got slump2 in the mail 30 minutes ago, it's in now, track 4 mac dre and buildin'...FIRST BEER OF THE WEEKEND AND FRESH MIX CD = BULLETPROOF
SNAP!
I walked in to one of the bathrooms that was a little off the beaten path and one of the kids, a big, pale gumpy looking fellow (with MY NAME) is lying on the tile floor, pants undone moaning and jerking off right in front of me! As soon as he realized that someone saw him, he shuffled up off of the floor mumbling "I'm sorry..." and locked himself in a stall. Whew.
you totally taught him something...goodjob.
a couple days after it came out, i was in one of the restrooms and heard two guys going at it.
on a separate occasion, i was taking a wizz, looked up at the writing on the wall, and it read, "if you're looking for a joke, it's in your hand." i felt shame
Why would ANYONE actually either catch the terd mid-drop and use it like a crayon OR hover above and askew of the seat so that the terd lands on it???
THE QUESTIONS.
i hear story after story of how gross men's bathrooms are. what's the hell?
Ladies room's don't exactly smell like roses, or do they?
Moms has tried to get through stories of hearing massive farts in the stalls without laughing hard enough for me to just have to call her back later, but damn, real dudez wanna know the dealz.
All of a sudden he leans his head over the divider between his urinal and mine, looks down at my dick, and says, "You got a rod stuck through there, man?" I kinda look at him like, well, yea. He hollers to his homie, "Yo, come check this out, guy's got an earring in his dick!"
Some other dude walks in and takes a gander at my mander.
After years of listening to gangsta rap I was sure I was about to be killed, or shot, or stabbed, or robbed. I mean, here I was, a white dude in a Compton bathroom with my pants open and two Brothers looking at my dick...
Finally the first dude says, "That's some crazy shit" and gives me a pound (hands unwashed). I walk back to my friend's car feeling like I just solved the race issue in America...
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Holy shit. oooh. wow. lotta good people doin good work in the bathrooms these days...
would it be wrong of me to use this as a location?
AWESOME!
SG
yes. with baited breath. as an aside, Bam, you could have started an "Obscure ways of contracting STDs" thread with this story. Unwashed pound? That totally violates the rules of pounding propriety.
I was straight like
you may want to pick another emoticon
Back in like '96 or so, my cousin and I were driving back home to the Bay Area from a trip to Vegas, I think. We were still a few hours from home and essentially in the middle of nowehere. I had to piss sooo bad, it wasn't even funny. I had been holding it for nearly an hour and meant to tell my cousin to pull over somewhere but dosed off. I woke up from my power nap startled as hell and paranoid -- it felt like someone had a knife to my bladder. So I tell my cousin "yo, I gotta go to the bathroom, man!" and immediately we see a sign for a rest stop that's coming up. Man, we pull up to this motherf*cker and I should have known something was gonna go down. First off, there's mad truckers parked in the lot and an absurd amount of random folks just loitering (resting) about. Plus, keep in mind, it was something like 1:00 in the morning...
So I bounce out of the car and jet to the restroom. I think the urinals were full so I had to go into one of the stalls. I'm in there going to the bathroom and there's some pretty suspect noises coming from the stall next to me. I listen for a few seconds more while I finish going to the bathroom, and it becomes apparent that this guy is whacking off right there in the stall! I couldn't believe this shit. I was like "fuck this, I'm out!" So I go out of the stall and head to the sink to wash up. I proceed to do so and I hear this loud noise from that dude in the stall -- which happens to be the closest one to me on the right -- I look over in that direction and this dirty-ass fool is literally on his knees with his dick coming out from under the stall. I didn't expect to see no shit like that and I ran my ass off getting back to the car. I felt so dirty just by being there, I don't even think I told my cousin what happened. It was fucked up.
Stay away from rest stop bathrooms. "They're the bathhouse of the '90s."
Shit. I only posted that story 'cause I read Raj's thread and thought the board was about to crash. I was duped. I want my privacy back!
D,
That particular piercing is called a "Prince Albert" and is the least painful of them. The urethra runs along the bottom of the penis, so the piercing only penetrates a thin layer of skin.
The one I was referring to is called an "Ampallang," which goes sideways right through the head. Like, over an inch of nerve endings and skin. Google that shit. (The funniest thing is, when you get the piercing they have to pick a rod that is the appropriate length. So they mark where the needle will penetrate, then give you a pair of calipers and ask you to go in the bathroom and get yourself erect, then measure the distance between the two points. It's funny to be sitting in the waiting room and see dudes come out of the bathroom holding this pair of calipers all self-conscious like....)
Coincidentally, as a Christmas present to that same friend whose car I slept in, I paid for his Prince Albert.
And yes, I took pictures.
If you dare, and want to check out my best friend's dick (with a little blood) fresh after he had a needle rammed through it, click here.
Some years later he had it taken out. (You have to pee sitting down, or hold your dick upside down, otherwise you get piss all over your shoes.) He told me his ex-girlfriend asked if she could have the ring! I guess she had good memories. If you can imagine trying to get that huge ring into a condom. But, it makes the head of your dick feeeeeel twice as big.
1982 - Hard Rock Cafe in Amsterdam. Walked in on two guys shooting up.
Some friends and I were leaving a club a few months ago and were on our way to the car. So we're walking through the parking lot cracking jokes, and I look to my right and my friend who's talking to me has his shit out and is pissing while he's walking.
We all start clowning when a car hits their lights on right as he's walking in front of them. Dude doesn't even bat an eye and just keeps going (where's the "gully" graemlin?). We were rolling!
haha, ive experienced this shit in port-a-potties..
I use to work in a gastation during high school also. We had this dude who liked to steal our toilet paper after he threw his own shit all over the walls in the bathroom. We'd kick him out but evertime some newjack started working he'd get in there and fuck it up so the rule was who ever let him shit had to clean it.
My buddy ran into a "challenged" guy in his thirties doing the same thing at a public pool restroom. The only thing that is different was he didn't stop or go into a stall. My buddy was shocked and didn't say anything. That what sucks in situations like that because they are so bizarre that you can't say anything. I would of said "hey buddy, wrap it up or get a stall"