f*cked up kids names

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  • asstroasstro 1,754 Posts


    Don't forget the last names as first names:

    McKenzie
    Taylor
    Hunter
    Blair
    Logan

    Or the endless variations:

    Hayden
    Payden
    Kaiden
    Jayden
    Braiden

    One of my best friends is dating a much younger girl who dissed us for giving our respective offspring boring names like Douglas, Rose, and Megan. Of course, her son's name is Jayden (or is it Jaiden?). She needs a smack.

    And my old roommate dated a girl whose last name was head. Of course, her dad's name was Richard.

  • spelunkspelunk 3,400 Posts
    TOOBA Girl 1
    TOOBEAR Boy 1
    TOOCHUKWU Boy 1
    TOOLARVAHN Girl 1
    TOOLSIE Boy 1
    TOORENO Boy 1
    TOOTIE

  • TOOBA Girl 1
    TOOBEAR Boy 1
    TOOCHUKWU Boy 1
    TOOLARVAHN Girl 1
    TOOLSIE Boy 1
    TOORENO Boy 1
    TOOTIE

    There's gotta be a Too'Paque somewhere in there.

  • spelunkspelunk 3,400 Posts
    RECORDO
    WAX


  • JustAliceJustAlice 1,308 Posts
    This thread is great!

    I see a lot of weird names on credit cars at the bar. I can't remember any of the top of my head but I've definitely known some Stoners, Weed's, And Dick's. There was one recently related to some female body parts, I wish I could remember. What is funny are parents who give their kids celebrity names because they already have the same last name, it kind of cop out. I'm definitely not hating on people who are trying to be original but most of these names in this thread are out of control.

    I have a customer with the last name of Funk, which is cool. I don't know how I feel about star wars references, it is kinda of the new Hippie...like Sky, or MoonFlower. I know an artist here who legally changed her last name to Superhero...I was telling Void today we should change our name to SalSoul.


    Speaking of names on credit cards there is one pet peeve I have as a bartender and that is people who S.P.E.L.L. their name for you instead of just saying it. Maybe I don't retain that kind of information for very long. I guess I am a Visual Learner not Audio, so it goes in one ear and out the other quicker than they can say it. I have caught myself on more than one occasion snapping "Can you just say it!? " I guess with all these new spins and spellings they think they are doing me a favor, but really they are just ticking me off.

  • asstroasstro 1,754 Posts


    Greatest sports name ever may be an old baseball player...Van Lingle Mungo

    Good as it is, I reckon it is trumped by english cricket legend Strangeways Pigg Strangeways

    You're both wrong:


  • My last name is Christ, so if I ever get a son, his name will be Jesus Elvis Rocky

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,963 Posts
    t3h bumpz0r

    In honour of my niece's kid, Rio [yes his dad is a mune].

  • dayday 9,611 Posts

    Androjeny (!)

    Good luck with that one

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,963 Posts
    Hey, I wish I had my way
    'Cause everyday would be a Friday
    You could even speed on the highway
    I would play ghetto games
    Name my kids ghetto names
    Little Mookie, big Al, Lorraine

    SO OLD SKOOL RIGHT THERE.

  • analog_tapeanalog_tape 604 Posts
    there is a little girl at my son's daycare named "Promise"

  • HorseleechHorseleech 3,830 Posts
    there is a little girl at my son's daycare named "Promise"

    The cemetery in town here has lots of stones that date from the 1700/1800s, and this name crops up fairly often.

  • Fred_GarvinFred_Garvin The land of wind and ghosts 337 Posts
    I once knew a Richard Wacker (father of a high school friend). And he specifically went by 'Dick' (that's how he introduced himself). Also, at my old job, I had clients named Gay Gerl and Brian Uren.

    The best one I've heard recently is a friend of my dad's: Hokum Jeebs.

  • My grandma's name is Segundo, which in English is second.

  • Garcia_VegaGarcia_Vega 2,428 Posts
    My grandma's name is Segundo, which in English is second.

    Segundo is a popular boys name in Spanish speaking countries, weird they would name a girl that, if anything it should be Segunda.

  • There was a kid in my school growing up, his name was Harry D. Weiner III. Not Harold. Harry. THE 3rd!!!

    Also, his friend's name is Benjamin D Weiner. Ben D Weiner.

    Both resembled their respective names too.

  • The_Hook_UpThe_Hook_Up 8,182 Posts
    I went to middle school with a girl named Sidonna Cox...no shit

    Best name as far as parents sense of humor was a girl I knew whose name was Robin Graves...

    Growing up, my next door neighbor was a school teacher and Ill never forget her telling us after the first day of school there were a brother and sister that were named Male (pronounced Mally) and Female (pronounced Fem-mally)

  • bassiebassie 11,710 Posts
    A kid no more, a woman where I tutor at is named Success. I don't think it's f*cked up really, but a hell of a lot to live up to!

    ...As is Adonis, which is the name of a failry known community worker around here.

  • ladydayladyday 623 Posts
    My friend had a kid in her class named Superior King.

  • I went to middle school with a girl named Sidonna Cox...no shit



    One of my friends was once with a girl called sumthin sumthin Weiser. Her brothers name...
    Bud!

  • there is a little girl at my son's daycare named "Promise"

    This reminds me of a girl that was in my friend's 1st Grade class named Unique. I had a 4th Grader named Precious.

  • HarveyCanalHarveyCanal "a distraction from my main thesis." 13,234 Posts
    I knew a dude named Trip...his brother's name was Graham and his sister's name was Sunshine.

  • My grandma's name is Segundo, which in English is second.

    Segundo is a popular boys name in Spanish speaking countries, weird they would name a girl that, if anything it should be Segunda.
    oops, thats what I meant Segunda

  • BreezBreez 1,706 Posts
    I think I mentioned this before in another thread, but I went to high school with a dude named Happy Hill.
    Also, a white girl named Jamaica and a dude named Edmond Dingis, no joke!

  • Young_PhonicsYoung_Phonics 8,039 Posts
    HAI GUYZ

    1). I know a person who works with a Hugh G Assaman. I have a screen grab of his ID card somewhere.

    2). My girls grandma remarried with an American GI and his name was TRIP HAMMER.

  • BreezBreez 1,706 Posts
    My dad worked with a dude named Dick Knox. Not as bad, but still wedgie worthy.

  • twoplytwoply Only Built 4 Manzanita Links 2,917 Posts
    I went to high school with a kid named Burgess Hanson. He came from money and had some self-esteem issues, so as soon as he turned 18 he changed his name to Logan Storm.

    Jesus. Apparently he was more messed up than I thought:

    http://www.oregonlive.com/portland/index.ssf/2011/02/beaverton_math_teacher_arreste.html

  • AlmondAlmond 1,427 Posts
    My brother has some Mien friends with names like Senator, Genesis, Pilot and Sunlight. Genesis is a pretty good one, I have to say.

  • AlmondAlmond 1,427 Posts
    My brother has some Mien friends with names like Senator, Genesis, Pilot and Sunlight. Genesis is a pretty good one, I have to say.

  • eliseelise 3,252 Posts
    I went to Culinary School with a guy with the last name Pleasure. He was a total mackavilly.
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