Where's the MFIng plane, godammit?

skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
edited March 2014 in Strut Central
What conspiracy theories you got?
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  Comments


  • HorseleechHorseleech 3,830 Posts
    It was stolen and landed in an abandoned military jungle airport.

  • LaserWolfLaserWolf Portland Oregon 11,517 Posts
    I've been avoiding the conspiracies.
    I was glad to see a cnn article yesterday written by the guy who wrote the book on the Air France Plane that disappeared after leaving Brasil. It took 2 years to find.
    He did a good job explaining why it was not that mysterious that there was no distress call and how hard it is to find a plane in a mostly deserted area the size of PA.
    When the plane is found investigators will be able to recreate the final minutes.

    Oops... what I meant to say is that aliens probably took it to the center of the earth so masons could use the blood of the passengers for matzos. Happens all the time.

  • HorseleechHorseleech 3,830 Posts
    LaserWolf said:
    I was glad to see a cnn article yesterday written by the guy who wrote the book on the Air France Plane that disappeared after leaving Brasil. It took 2 years to find.

    No.

    The wreckage was spotted the next day. It took two years to recover the black boxes.

  • tech12ztech12z 56 Posts
    LaserWolf said:

    Aliens probably took it to the center of the earth so masons could use the blood of the passengers for matzos. Happens all the time.

    I'm glad I'm not alone in this belief.

  • dukeofdelridgedukeofdelridge urgent.monkey.mice 2,453 Posts
    Horseleech said:
    It was stolen and landed in an abandoned military jungle airport.

    If I don't have to take the most obvious "flying metal tube crashed into water at night," I like this one. It has way more exciting plot possibilities.

  • dj_cityboydj_cityboy 1,464 Posts
    dudes they are on the Lost island with Hurley and Mr Chang and the polar bears

  • ElectrodeElectrode Los Angeles 3,096 Posts
    It's pathetic, but when this story first broke, this Twilight Zone episode came to mind



    Jewels of wisdom from the comments section, as usual...

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,919 Posts
    If I was the bloke that found it, I would be doing by best Herve Villechaize "Fantasy Island" impression over the radio.


  • The people on the plane are dead and their deaths were most likely protracted and agonising. Their families and friends are devastated.

  • RisingsonRisingson 696 Posts
    pimlicosquirrel said:
    The people on the plane are dead and their deaths were most likely protracted and agonising. Their families and friends are devastated.

    +1....thoughts and prayers with all those poor souls and their families.

    Reports this morning that the plane was airborn for 4 hours after last contact. No details on sources.

  • bassiebassie 11,710 Posts
    Not knowing anything about aviation, engineering, chemistry, etc etc - is it wholly impossible that there was an explosion so powerful that it could have disintegrated the entire plane? Or close enough to it that scattered remnants wouldn't be recognized for what they were?

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    Taking the simple case of one single explosion in the body of the plane, the extremeties - wings, tail bit - would be propelled out relatively intact, no?
    And the shape of a wing is suited to floating, I assume.

    Outside of skulduggery, it seems hard to believe a whole plane can leave no trace in the accidental explosion scenario.

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,919 Posts
    Did it just vanish :clicks fingers: like that, or did it carry on and ditch somewhere?

    Apart from the engines, most other bits of an airliner are made of materials as light as financially possible, as this saves fuel, and therefore money. And given that the purpose of much of the surface is to trap air, large bits will rip off in the event of a catastrophic loss of integrity to the main fuselage. You would have to have multiple explosions all over the body of the craft to obliterate it.

    These bits, I would have thought, would have been visible from a satellite, and there should be enough lightweight floating detritus to be washing up about now. Surely foll and foll are fishing those waters to death on the reg, they must have seen some fireworks if it did play out this way. There's something missing from this jigsaw.

    Otherwise, it was nabbed by a mothership. Stat. Waiting for baggage claim on Proxima Centauri. Man dem get 'nuff airmile, so, evey cloud and all that...

    Srs doe, I favour the first explanation more and chose not to make light of the dead. Terrible way to go. RIP.

  • santanicsantanic 69 Posts
    four words..... mutha effing David Copperfield

  • HorseleechHorseleech 3,830 Posts
    bassie said:
    Not knowing anything about aviation, engineering, chemistry, etc etc - is it wholly impossible that there was an explosion so powerful that it could have disintegrated the entire plane? Or close enough to it that scattered remnants wouldn't be recognized for what they were?

    No matter how catastrophic the explosion, there should be a large debris field which would be fairly easy to spot, even given the large area that they are searching. For the reasons mentioned above, a major part of an airplane like this is made of materials that would float.

    Thing is, at any given time there are lots of satellites over the area whose main function is to spot large explosions and none of them saw anything. It's highly unlikely that the plane exploded (unless some country isn't talking) and it almost certainly went down somewhere else other than where they have been searching.

    At this point it is very strange that they haven't found it, and as each day goes by any debris field in the ocean is getting more and more scattered. I hope for the sake of the family of those on board that they figure this out soon.

  • bassiebassie 11,710 Posts
    Horseleech said:
    (unless some country isn't talking)

    After reading the technical explanations above - this was the first thing that came to mind...but what could possibly be gained from not coming forward about finding the plane?

  • HorseleechHorseleech 3,830 Posts
    bassie said:
    After reading the technical explanations above - this was the first thing that came to mind...but what could possibly be gained from not coming forward about finding the plane?

    Most likely nothing, and I really doubt anyone is sitting on evidence at this point.

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,919 Posts
    The Malay government are not used to answering questions.

    That appears to be the accepted norm over there. Therefore they have become lazy and complacent. They obviously don't have the means; the professional lines of communication; to know what happened, but won't want to lose face by admitting this. Neither do they have experience of dealing with Western-strength media spotlights, so have no alternate B.S. machine to turn to either.

    Unfortunately, they are finding that saying nothing is not an appropriate response.

  • RockadelicRockadelic Out Digging 13,993 Posts
    Horseleech said:
    It was stolen and landed in an abandoned military jungle airport.

    I work with a guy who is ex-CIA and he absolutely believes this.....says most likely in Viet Nam on one of the many airstrips that our military built.

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    bassie said:
    Horseleech said:
    (unless some country isn't talking)

    After reading the technical explanations above - this was the first thing that came to mind...but what could possibly be gained from not coming forward about finding the plane?

    One consequence is that the world's attention is diverted from Ukraine/Crimea.



    Hmmm.

  • dukeofdelridgedukeofdelridge urgent.monkey.mice 2,453 Posts
    The planet is still pretty big. There's a cell phone coverage dead spot in West Seattle, right over there. Nobody's phones work. It's way sexier to have a stolen plane squirreled away in a secret mountain base, with the passengers getting brainwiped to accept their new destruction orders, but dudes I gotta say I have my money on crashed and just simply not found yet.

  • dj_cityboydj_cityboy 1,464 Posts
    in a report i saw last night on CNN they mentioned they lost two planes in the 90's (i believe they said) as well, it was during a space shuttle launch and they took down the sattelite that tracked the planes flying from Cali to Hawaii to use them to track the shuttle launch. and the planes dissappeared off the radar and later reappeared... wtf

  • Alex Jones blames Obama.

  • LaserWolfLaserWolf Portland Oregon 11,517 Posts
    Like people are saying, explosion is becoming less likely, and explosion over water even more so.

    Surprisingly, explosions leave lots of evidence. In the Lockerbie bombing they were able to reassemble the wreckage to the degree that they could identify which/whose suitcase the bomb was in.

    I like the jungle landing, airfield perhaps, or emergency/crash landing in dense forest.
    I doubt this is terrorism or some evil comic book villain.

    I listened yesterday to speculation that this was Uyghur terrorist, and that they were also behind the rail station stabbings in China.
    In my experience terrorists take credit for their attacks and use high profile attacks to raise their profile.

    I don't think any satellites were tracking the jet.

  • bassiebassie 11,710 Posts
    LaserWolf said:

    I listened yesterday to speculation that this was Uyghur terrorist, and that they were also behind the rail station stabbings in China.


    It also seems like a pretty big leap to go from homemade car bombings and stabbings to something that could cause such baffling destruction.
    But who knows? At this point, the only thing that would shock me is a miraculously happy ending of the plane re-appearing intact with a "Sorry, wrong turn."

  • The_NonThe_Non 5,691 Posts
    Rockadelic said:
    Horseleech said:
    It was stolen and landed in an abandoned military jungle airport.

    I work with a guy who is ex-CIA and he absolutely believes this.....says most likely in Vietnam on one of the many airstrips that our military built.

    As time goes on, I'm starting to believe this too, and for reasons/purposes that are simply terrifying to imagine, particularly after the revelation the plane flew 4-5 more hrs after it stopped showing up on radar.

  • LaserWolfLaserWolf Portland Oregon 11,517 Posts
    bassie said:
    LaserWolf said:

    I listened yesterday to speculation that this was Uyghur terrorist, and that they were also behind the rail station stabbings in China.


    It also seems like a pretty big leap to go from homemade car bombings and stabbings to something that could cause such baffling destruction.
    But who knows? At this point, the only thing that would shock me is a miraculously happy ending of the plane re-appearing intact with a "Sorry, wrong turn."

    A better scenario would be: the only thing that would shock me is a miraculously happy ending of the plane re-appearing intact with a "What do you mean lost? We left Malaysia 6 hours ago."

  • bassiebassie 11,710 Posts
    The_Non said:
    Rockadelic said:
    Horseleech said:
    It was stolen and landed in an abandoned military jungle airport.

    I work with a guy who is ex-CIA and he absolutely believes this.....says most likely in Vietnam on one of the many airstrips that our military built.

    As time goes on, I'm starting to believe this too, and for reasons/purposes that are simply terrifying to imagine, particularly after the revelation the plane flew 4-5 more hrs after it stopped showing up on radar.

    I've read mixed reports about the extra flight hours, they've confirmed it now?

  • HollafameHollafame 844 Posts
    LaserWolf said:
    bassie said:
    LaserWolf said:

    I listened yesterday to speculation that this was Uyghur terrorist, and that they were also behind the rail station stabbings in China.


    It also seems like a pretty big leap to go from homemade car bombings and stabbings to something that could cause such baffling destruction.
    But who knows? At this point, the only thing that would shock me is a miraculously happy ending of the plane re-appearing intact with a "Sorry, wrong turn."

    A better scenario would be: the only thing that would shock me is a miraculously happy ending of the plane re-appearing intact with a "What do you mean lost? We left Malaysia 6 hours ago."

    WORMHOLE.

    Paging NDeGT

  • LaserWolfLaserWolf Portland Oregon 11,517 Posts
    HOLLAFAME said:
    LaserWolf said:
    bassie said:
    LaserWolf said:

    I listened yesterday to speculation that this was Uyghur terrorist, and that they were also behind the rail station stabbings in China.


    It also seems like a pretty big leap to go from homemade car bombings and stabbings to something that could cause such baffling destruction.
    But who knows? At this point, the only thing that would shock me is a miraculously happy ending of the plane re-appearing intact with a "Sorry, wrong turn."

    A better scenario would be: the only thing that would shock me is a miraculously happy ending of the plane re-appearing intact with a "What do you mean lost? We left Malaysia 6 hours ago."

    WORMHOLE.

    Paging NDeGT

    Totally. What would be great is if the flight recorders confirmed the 6 hours.
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