TAKE THAT SHIT TO THE-BRITS.COM

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  • ppadilhappadilha 2,167 Posts
    I thought I was being clever and captained Jesus instead of Haaland, since I figured there was no way he'd get two hat tricks in a row...

  • ppadilhappadilha 2,167 Posts
    I guess no one realized how toxic it could be to have to sit down with Joris Bohnson AND Liz Truss all in the same day

  • DuderonomyDuderonomy Haut de la Garenne 7,693 Posts

  • DORDOR Two Ron Toe 9,883 Posts
    End of an era. R.I.P.

  • JimsterJimster Big scene at Nando's 6,713 Posts
    Chuck pon di Christmas stamps, stat.

  • JimsterJimster Big scene at Nando's 6,713 Posts
    Was reading an excellent 2017 piece about how planning for this eventuality has already been teed up for years.

    https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2017/mar/16/what-happens-when-queen-elizabeth-dies-london-bridge?CMP=Share_AndroidApp_Other

    “The King’s life is moving peacefully towards its close,” was the final notice issued by George V’s doctor, Lord Dawson, at 9.30pm on the night of 20 January 1936. Not long afterwards, Dawson injected the king with 750mg of morphine and a gram of cocaine – enough to kill him twice over – in order to ease the monarch’s suffering, and to have him expire in time for the printing presses of the Times, which rolled at midnight."

    I want to see that offered on the NHS.
    ketanDuderonomy

  • JimsterJimster Big scene at Nando's 6,713 Posts
    Charlie Sheen : "Challenge accepted."

  • I guess the late Lyndon LaRouche's crack wetwork squad finally got to her for her role in the International Grain Cartel

  • JimsterJimster Big scene at Nando's 6,713 Posts
    Duderonomy

  • DORDOR Two Ron Toe 9,883 Posts
    When do we start seeing Chuck Bucks? £ $

  • ppadilhappadilha 2,167 Posts
    Image

  • I think of them more like those rustic carrots that have multiple ends



  • ppadilhappadilha 2,167 Posts
    I think he has more of a turnip complexion

  • JimsterJimster Big scene at Nando's 6,713 Posts
    I think his days are short... If he gets a wiggle on, the muppets at the back of the queue now might get to see him lying in state.

  • funny story, I've been spending a lot of time in and around the QUEUE ZONE, people watching, getting to work etc. cause it's close.

    this morning, randomly in our neighborhood nearby, my toddler was pushing his balance bike down the sidewalk, really hauling ass and having fun, and two cops block the way ahead of him, shouting to stop and wait. I grab his shoulder and slow him down, the bike falls out from under him and he starts wailing. he did not want to stop. I kneel down and hug him while he cries. I give the biggest stinkeye to the cop. he looks sheepish.

    five seconds pass and a motorcade pulls up to the curb just behind the cop, another 10 seconds and you guessed it, the king is slithering out of a big hearse/popemobile hybrid and walking across the sidewalk into the police station, not 20 feet from my screaming kid. he awkwardly waves at us and the others waiting by the cops. they hold us another minute and let us go.

    a couple hours later we're getting lunch by the southbank and having a picnic. nearby is The Queue Of Death. I ask somebody zombieing by when he started queueing. he said 4am. it was 1:30pm and we were not very near the end of the line. I didn't mention waiting 10 seconds and seeing the king, alive, not in a closed lead-lined coffin, earlier that day, but I imagine he wouldn't have been impressed.

    while I don't care about the queen or anything, i think the fact that seeing charles alive in the flesh at random was nothing but an unpleasant inconvenience at the same time as thousands are freezing their snot in the wind tonight to see the closed coffin of his mom is significant. doubtful there'll be the same Eternal Queue for him when he croaks in a few weeks/months.

  • DuderonomyDuderonomy Haut de la Garenne 7,693 Posts
    LOL. I think you shouting at her car a few months back (IIRC?) was what did ‘er in. Regicide!

    See if you can work the same magic with Chuck please, k, thnx, bye xxxx

  • JimsterJimster Big scene at Nando's 6,713 Posts
    I heard "Find Klezmer Elec...." (Croak) were her last words.

    Secret's safe with me bud.

  • yes the queen road rager was me haha. I wish I ran into cool famous people instead of goddam royals. oddly I didn't think to specifically appraise his hand bloat levels at the time, it happened very quickly, but thinking back his hands did seem biggish so... clock's ticking, chuckie...?
    Jimster

  • JimsterJimster Big scene at Nando's 6,713 Posts
    Tough wank.
    @Duderonony looking at you fam

    ppadilhaDuderonomy

  • ppadilhappadilha 2,167 Posts
    Duder wanking to the coffin is the kind of hero we need these days.

    In a related note, a friend of mine in NYC who had grown up in Spain told me his first date with his then-wife consisted of him bringing her home and sitting down to watch old videos of Franco's funeral. So go on Duder, whatever you need to get in the mood...
    DuderonomyJimster

  • DuderonomyDuderonomy Haut de la Garenne 7,693 Posts
    I did actually have a wank today, and I’m sure a tiny part of my mind was cognisant that it was HRH’s big day - not sure if that counts?

  • "difficult to jerk it to" still reigning as the top all-purpose youtube etc. comment
    Duderonomydukeofdelridge

  • JimsterJimster Big scene at Nando's 6,713 Posts
    I did actually have a wank today, and I’m sure a tiny part of my mind was cognisant that it was HRH’s big day - not sure if that counts?

    UNBROKEN STREAK.

    Duderonomy

  • ppadilhappadilha 2,167 Posts
    Glad to see England's WC preparations are going swimmingly

  • JimsterJimster Big scene at Nando's 6,713 Posts
    The injured Kalvin Phillips is the missing piece, no confidence otherwise.  Looks like Foden and Bellingham are going to be doing heavy lifting if England are going to have a good run.  

    Gotta be honest with you, doesn't look like a strong side for the WC.  Out to Italy in the last 16.

    Promised myself I'd not get wound up over the footie anymore so my emotional investment in the sham that is Qatar is minimal.

  • DuderonomyDuderonomy Haut de la Garenne 7,693 Posts
    Jimster said:

    Promised myself I'd not get wound up over the footie anymore so my emotional investment in the sham that is Qatar is minimal.

    Yeah, I tell myself that, but once the tournament comes along... I'll be watching. And probably swearing at the tv!

    ........

    Granit Xhaka MOTM against Totteningham. 3-1 to the Arse. Top of the league (still). Only Brett Earthling (honest) Haaland has outscored us. What a Saturday afternoon to be alive.

    Jimster

  • JimsterJimster Big scene at Nando's 6,713 Posts
    Gutted to concede against the scum.

    Trois hattricks pon di spin ya dunk now.  Step to the rear and cheer.

    Ay, Arteta got them lads purring like a well-oiled bimmer.  Pray Jesus stays fit doe.
    Duderonomy

  • DuderonomyDuderonomy Haut de la Garenne 7,693 Posts
    I nearly went full Keegan watching Manure take such a kicking, but there was also that nagging feeling that we have to play against that monster: whatever the doubts might’ve been about how well or not Haaland would work in a Pep team, the kid has destroyed them.

    At the same age Haaland is now, Messi had scored 44 goals. C. Ronaldo 50.

    Haaland has 170.

    Haaland reached 3 Prem league hat tricks in 8 games. The next fastest was Michael Owen on 48.

    If those numbers aren’t scary enough, there’s the eye test. Best description I’ve seen yet is that it’s like watching an adult play against children.
    ……..


    Arsenal are doing great. The vibe in the stadium is bouncing, and the redemptive arc of Granit Xhaka feels like a Hollywood story. As important as Jesus is, I think Partey is the difference maker. The team has goals from other players but nobody does the Busquets/Makalele role like him. When he plays, we tend to win, we Partey doesn’t we tend to lose.

  • dukeofdelridgedukeofdelridge urgent.monkey.mice 2,448 Posts
    My body is trashed. You guys are making me think I ought to stream some socker games this weekend.
    I like the colors. The green grass. The bright uniforms. The yellow cards. 
    It makes me feel very wet leaves autumn in the Pacific Northwest…we’re in the hottest driest extended summer of my life, I could vibe with this. 

  • JimsterJimster Big scene at Nando's 6,713 Posts
    I send you a City shirt.
    You send me one of your vintage 2021 eebs.
    It's ok, keep the change.
    dukeofdelridge
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