the saying "things happen for a reason" yay or nay

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  • bassiebassie 11,710 Posts
    have a blessed day!

    Middle-aged Black Woman Phone greeting related

    My dad used to be infuriated by people who responded to the question "How are you?" with "I'm blessed"

    Bless-ed, right?

  • faux_rillzfaux_rillz 14,343 Posts
    I hear people say that shit like it's some deep philosophical exposition on the current state of the universe. save it.

    everything is everything

    One time a dude ahead of me in line at the post office called up his man to inquire as to whether everything was currently everything.

    I would hang up if anyone ever did that to me.

  • SoulhawkSoulhawk 3,197 Posts
    One time a dude ahead of me in line at the post office called up his man to inquire as to whether everything was currently everything.

    translation: "did you get the drugs yet?"

    it's a very flexible expression

  • FrankFrank 2,373 Posts
    how about "I have a habit of disregarding reason and sometimes even put it on a plane to russia like an unwanted orphan"?

    damn... I have to memorize that!

  • FatbackFatback 6,746 Posts
    I hear most of these things as "I'm a shallow idiot. Don't waste your time talking to me."

  • DJFerrariDJFerrari 2,411 Posts
    The worst is when people reply to something I said with "that's what I'm talking about"

    No it isn't! I just said it! It's what I'm talking about!

    (I stole this joke from a stand-up comic... can't remember who)

  • HarveyCanalHarveyCanal "a distraction from my main thesis." 13,234 Posts
    have a blessed day!

    Middle-aged Black Woman Phone greeting related

    My dad used to be infuriated by people who responded to the question "How are you?" with "I'm blessed"

    Yes, more plaese on how you got to be the way you are now.


    you crack me up sometimes.

    Like I even need to say this to this group, but all my jabs always come with the given that I'm definitely as mixed up as anyone.

    Therefore, they are meant to make you crack up...like I'm over here right this second cracking up (and possibly I'm not talking about laughing either...ex-wife related).

    But yeah...

    Que sera, sera.

  • dwyhajlodwyhajlo 420 Posts
    You guys sound up-tight. Some of these turns of phrase are great ways to shut down uninteresting conversations, before they have a chance to take a turn for the stupid.

    "Hey did you hear what that moron from [horrible local sports team] did?"
    "It is what it is."

    -Fin-

  • mrmatthewmrmatthew 1,575 Posts
    hey, it's all good

    BAN

  • barjesusbarjesus 872 Posts
    It depends who says "things happen for a reason". If it's the person who just went through something shitty, I have no problem with them getting what comfort they can get from saying this. But if you are the comforter, this often comes off pretty shallow.

    "It is what it is", I say it. It's just another way to say "you can't change the past, let's keep it moving".

  • BreakSelfBreakSelf 2,925 Posts
    everything is everything

    This one doesn't bug me either. I blame Sadat X.






    Of course, but I didn't hear DH until well after Brand Nubian.

  • Look, everyone... if it doesn't kill you, it will only make you stronger.

  • batmonbatmon 27,574 Posts
    The worst is when people reply to something I said with "that's what I'm talking about"

    No it isn't! I just said it! It's what I'm talking about!

    (I stole this joke from a stand-up comic... can't remember who)

    u and the comic sound white

  • DB_CooperDB_Cooper Manhatin' 7,823 Posts
    Look, everyone... if it doesn't kill you, it will only make you stronger.

    Ha! Or leave you a crippled shell of your former self. One of those.

  • DJFerrariDJFerrari 2,411 Posts
    The worst is when people reply to something I said with "that's what I'm talking about"

    No it isn't! I just said it! It's what I'm talking about!

    (I stole this joke from a stand-up comic... can't remember who)

    u and the comic sound white

    Ummm... obviously... this your first time on Soulstrut? I've been here and as white as can be the whole time.

  • BreakSelfBreakSelf 2,925 Posts
    Look, everyone... if it doesn't kill you, it will only make you stronger.

    Favorite saying of the comatose!

  • DB_CooperDB_Cooper Manhatin' 7,823 Posts
    The worst is when people reply to something I said with "that's what I'm talking about"

    No it isn't! I just said it! It's what I'm talking about!

    (I stole this joke from a stand-up comic... can't remember who)

    u and the comic sound white

    Ummm... obviously... this your first time on Soulstrut? I've been here and as white as can be the whole time.

    It's true. He's really, really white. Like, extra white. Glossy white.

  • FatbackFatback 6,746 Posts
    you say tomato - I say tomato

    Once I witnessed an opposing attorney say this to a judge by way of explaining why her view of the case differed from mine.


  • ladydayladyday 623 Posts
    Can I wimp out and say both?

    I find it annoying as a phrase, because the way most people use it to try to console you when something shitty happens. "Don't worry, everything happens for a reason." Which only makes you feel like shit by demeaning your sorrow.

    But, as a philosophy, I can't fault it. You can look at it as a simplified version of Nietzsche's notion of Amor fati (love of fate) wherein you accept every occurance in your life as positive and necessary. Or in Judaism, the saying "gam zeh letovah" ("this too is for the best").

    Like Frank said, you can spend a lot of unnecessary energy looking for a reason why something has happened instead of embracing it and looking for the opportunities it presents you for the future.

  • DJBombjackDJBombjack Miami 1,665 Posts
    I can't stand "...at the end of the day"

    Overused. Ugh. A horrible way of summarizing events.

  • HarveyCanalHarveyCanal "a distraction from my main thesis." 13,234 Posts
    Fusk the future, we want it NOW!

  • DB_CooperDB_Cooper Manhatin' 7,823 Posts
    I can't stand "...at the end of the day"

    Overused. Ugh. A horrible way of summarizing events.

    You must REALLY hate this phrase, because I remember you mentioning it before. Whatever. At the end of the day, it is what it is. Yeah, that just happened. And it happened for a reason.

  • SoulhawkSoulhawk 3,197 Posts
    you say tomato - I say tomato

    Once I witnessed an opposing attorney say this to a judge by way of explaining why her view of the case differed from mine.


    ...I'd like to cite the Supreme Court ruling in People v Heinz

  • bassiebassie 11,710 Posts
    lmho

  • Hotsauce84Hotsauce84 8,450 Posts
    It be's that way sometimes.

  • ladydayladyday 623 Posts
    Fusk the future, we want it NOW!


  • i've had major medical problems since i was 4 years old. i can't begin to count the number of times some asshole has said "everything happens for a reason" about the medical problems. makes me wanna cut motherfuckers up.

    yeah, they happen for a reason. i guess your lucky its my reason and not yours.

  • edith headedith head 5,106 Posts

    But, as a philosophy, I can't fault it. You can look at it as a simplified version of Nietzsche's notion of Amor fati (love of fate) wherein you accept every occurance in your life as positive and necessary. Or in Judaism, the saying "gam zeh letovah" ("this too is for the best").

    i think this is precisely why it bugs me so much because i don't believe in fate at all and believe things happen because of chance and/or your own actions. like bassie said, this saying is a little too close to "it's God's will"

    the other part that bothers me is that when it is said, it reeks of lazy thinking (or none at all) or is used as a cop out excuse for taking no accountability for your own actions, (i.e. well if everything happens for a reason, i really don't need to put any effort into examining this)

    for those reasons above, i have always been irked by the shallowness of the saying.

  • discos_almadiscos_alma discos_alma 2,164 Posts
    "Count Your Lucky Stars"

    How about I go drink a beer instead?

  • jaysusjaysus 787 Posts
    This thread really hit home for me as I have been hanging out with this girl lately who happens to say "Que sera, sera, whatever will be, will be, it is what it is" DIRECT QUOTE! and this increases with alcohol consumption. I keep on trying to stop her by interjecting C'est la vie. Take that!



    Really need to up my conversationalist game, god damn.
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