What?! Let it go. ALL peeps can get herpes, GENERALLY the more sexual partners, the higher the likelihood of STDS. I'm not saying this cuz it gives me great playsure, dude, just cause it be true.
I was really thinking about this issue the other day... cause I love my girl... but i just wanna fuck everything that walks. Even more so being in a relationship. I think having to repress your sexual desires for other women simply makes it worse. THUS... if you are forcing your body to repress something JUST to be in a monogamous relationship... isn't your body saying... hey... go fuck more women.
another theory of mine is that it's in the BEST INTEREST of your relationship with your wife / girlfriend / significant other that you get some strange stuff every now and then (safely, of course... and not TOO strange)... otherwise you may consciously or subconciously grow resentful at being handcuffed in monogamy and it will come out whether you want it to or not. Put your spoon in some other puddin' every now and then and it'll keep things fresh instead of it always being the same damn routine with the same damn puddin'. I'm trying to convince my wife that a concubine for me would be the best thing to keep our love alive forever. She's not buying it for some reason. I'm not done championing this idea, though
i agree, it is science. man is born to be sexually attracted to women (at least most are) due to the need for him to reproduce. if you are an atheist who believes in science, there is no rationale to explain why men would NOT continue to have sexual desires for other women. its all about self control though. i wouldn't go using science as an excuse to be an asshole.
my own 2 cents on guys/girls who cheat is that i don't trust them.
Who is to say that women don't want to sleep with every other man, your friends, brothers, etc? Why limit this to men?
While I agree with the original sentiment of the post the way it was written was entirely juvenile and almost absurd. I don't want to "bone" every girl I see, but I sure want to bone many women who aren't the person I am dating.
In any case, my personal opinion is that any "gender" roles are all societal constructs. I think at the base level "attraction" is not hindered even by sex (in the sense that we are all bi-sexual creatures) but that by the negative societal view of homosexuality and polyamory we end up behaving as straight sex-deprived individuals in monogamous relationships.
This being said, our society is so ingrained in monogamy that trying to engage in polyamorous relationships mostly ends in disaster. I say this as someone who has tried. And being that monogamy has existed for as long as property relations and being that I don't see those going away anytime soon we are stuck with what we have.
So it's not the "women's" responsibility to come to terms with "man's nature" so much as our responsibility to do the best with the environment we are presented with.
Isn't the very act of living in a society mean the supression of certain human tendancies? Also, if we bring it down to our most base tendencies, then what about killing & rape?
As for the point that most cultures are monogamous, I think that opens into a big debate around biology vs. sociology. Monogamy is enforced by social norms (especially in societies with a strong religious influence) in such a way that it's become "naturalized" but that doesn't suggest, by any means, that it's indeed, "natural."
Gramscian Hegemonic dominance of the culture of only 1 pussy per man.
I agree with much of what Canonical is writing though I think picking on Phil's OG post for being "juvenile" is protesting too loudly...I mean, it was clearly meant tongue-in-cheek.
I'm assuming however, most people agree that promiscuity is not a male specific desire/issue. There are plenty of women on the creep. I think the disproportion of men who cheat is more reflective of the influence of patriarchy. In a traditional, male-dominated society, women typically have more to "lose" then men do if they're not faithful (start with financial support, move up to life). In a society with a different set of gender power relations, I could easily imagine different rates (or standards).
Who is to say that women don't want to sleep with every other man, your friends, brothers, etc? Why limit this to men?
While I agree with the original sentiment of the post the way it was written was entirely juvenile and almost absurd. I don't want to "bone" every girl I see, but I sure want to bone many women who aren't the person I am dating.
In any case, my personal opinion is that any "gender" roles are all societal constructs. I think at the base level "attraction" is not hindered even by sex (in the sense that we are all bi-sexual creatures) but that by the negative societal view of homosexuality and polyamory we end up behaving as straight sex-deprived individuals in monogamous relationships.
This being said, our society is so ingrained in monogamy that trying to engage in polyamorous relationships mostly ends in disaster. I say this as someone who has tried. And being that monogamy has existed for as long as property relations and being that I don't see those going away anytime soon we are stuck with what we have.
So it's not the "women's" responsibility to come to terms with "man's nature" so much as our responsibility to do the best with the environment we are presented with.
I agree with much of what Canonical is writing though I think picking on Phil's OG post for being "juvenile" is protesting too loudly...I mean, it was clearly meant tongue-in-cheek.
Isn't the very act of living in a society mean the supression of certain human tendancies? Also, if we bring it down to our most base tendencies, then what about killing & rape?
Depends on what you consider "human tendencies". I'm not sure either murder or rape are base human desires.
In any case, my personal opinion is that any "gender" roles are all societal constructs. I think at the base level "attraction" is not hindered even by sex (in the sense that we are all bi-sexual creatures) but that by the negative societal view of homosexuality and polyamory we end up behaving as straight sex-deprived individuals in monogamous relationships.
This being said, our society is so ingrained in monogamy that trying to engage in polyamorous relationships mostly ends in disaster. I say this as someone who has tried. And being that monogamy has existed for as long as property relations and being that I don't see those going away anytime soon we are stuck with what we have.
So it's not the "women's" responsibility to come to terms with "man's nature" so much as our responsibility to do the best with the environment we are presented with.
This is probably the most intelligent and on-point non music-related comment I have ever seen on SoulStrut. Amen.
While I agree with the original sentiment of the post the way it was written was entirely juvenile and almost absurd. I don't want to "bone" every girl I see, but I sure want to bone many women who aren't the person I am dating.
I accept your apology, but let me still point out the way the original sentiment of the post was written was NOT entirely juvenile and almost absurd because I never said that every man wants to bone every girl they see, I said
i have always held the belief that it is a man's very NATURE to want to bone every woman that he is attracted to[/b]
i stand by that belief and the way that it was written. although i consider myself to be the MASTER of entirely juvenile and almost absurd soulstrut poasts, that particular poast was neither. in fact, i would go so far as to say it was the realest schitt i ever wrote
Based on my most recent experience - basically, attending my Sister's wedding yesterday and wanting to sleep with almost every woman over 17 and under 50, including the fiances of a few cousins, my Sister's friends and friends' wives, etc - I will have to say most definitely YES.
Hell I look at other women that I find beautiful. Now act on those thoughts of sex with another. Shit I'll tell if someone else on here admits some shit.
Isn't the very act of living in a society mean the supression of certain human tendancies? Also, if we bring it down to our most base tendencies, then what about killing & rape?
Depends on what you consider "human tendencies". I'm not sure either murder or rape are base human desires.
But do things like killing represent our animal nature? Also, what is natural for humans anyway? I don't know anything about this ish. I should have taken some sociology courses! I wish someone would start a thread about Dostoyevsky. There, I'd know what I was talking about.
being monogamous PAINS me like you wouldn't believe
I'm thinking others CAN believe.
yeah, but it gets worse when you get older... it's like "OMG, MY TRIM-GETTIN' TIME IS RUNNING OUT!!!" for example- i got this young fine lil chick at the local convenience store givin' me the "you-can-poke-this-out-if-you-want-it" look and i'm like daaam... i'm gettin' to the age where soon i ain't gonna GET too many chances like this without payin' for it! (which is just in my book... for a man of my ambiance? NEVER) It's hard staying faithful with that kinda pressure on ya, man
Isn't the very act of living in a society mean the supression of certain human tendancies? Also, if we bring it down to our most base tendencies, then what about killing & rape?
Depends on what you consider "human tendencies". I'm not sure either murder or rape are base human desires.
But do things like killing represent our animal nature? Also, what is natural for humans anyway? I don't know anything about this ish. I should have taken some sociology courses! I wish someone would start a thread about Dostoyevsky. There, I'd know what I was talking about.
I think attraction between people is a mix of biology, psychology and sociology and it's damn near impossible to parse. Studying chimps and bonobos might offer some interesting evolutionary contrasts but at the end of the day, our desire to fuck people (committed partners or otherwise) is a mix between the pull of our minds and our gonads.
Same goes for other "impulses". Desiring to kill people probably is a base human desire but it's likelihood of happening is conditioned by more than just biological instinct or sociology alone.
The original point is whether "monogamy" is natural or not and I guess what I'm saying is that it's not, either in terms of biological impulses or in terms of living in societies where the lure of sex is so thoroughly intermeshed into everyday media and cultural life.
Let's face it - American society, at the very least, is completely schizoid (if not hypocritical) when it comes to what it teaches about marriage on one hand and sex on the other. Blaming the desire for polyamorous liasions on biology is a simple way of eliding the social contradictions.
As a woman, this thread seems kind of confusing. I understand the idea of nature, but what about morals? I, of course, can and as well find other men attractive, but never ever think of cheating or wanting to fuck them. Unless of course, you are in an open relationship that is agreed upon.
Seems to me, men like that, have no self control and only nasty bitches bang men like that. No offense to anyone who may choose that lifestyle, but that is my honest opinion. And I know of a lot of other attractive, smart well endowed females like me who agree... [/sarcasm]
Thats my input, and maybe I need to know more, but I feel lucky knowing the man I'm with may have find another female attractive(of course! A-DUH!), but doesn't plot or think about fucking her.(----run on sentence with lots of coma's)
Put your spoon in some other puddin' every now and then and it'll keep things fresh instead of it always being the same damn routine with the same damn puddin'.
my wife is less than amused that i found this funny. she said she's going to start looking for new spoons. i guess that means it's all good!!
Put your spoon in some other puddin' every now and then and it'll keep things fresh instead of it always being the same damn routine with the same damn puddin'.
my wife is less than amused that i found this funny. she said she's going to start looking for new spoons. i guess that means it's all good!!
shit, I'd say fuck spoons! Im looking for ladles!!!
I feel lucky knowing the man I'm with may have find another female attractive(of course! A-DUH!), but doesn't plot or think about fucking her
I wonder what a relationship is like when you can read the mind of your lover. Do you consider mental telepathy a plus in your relationship?
Seriously - I can respect that you feel confident your man would never cheat on you, and I agree that there are millions of people out there that never would cheat on the one they love. But if you think he never thinks about having sex with another woman, either you are naive or he is an incredibly unique individual.
As a woman, this thread seems kind of confusing. I understand the idea of nature, but what about morals? I, of course, can and as well find other men attractive, but never ever think of cheating or wanting to fuck them. Unless of course, you are in an open relationship that is agreed upon.
Seems to me, men like that, have no self control and only nasty bitches bang men like that. No offense to anyone who may choose that lifestyle, but that is my honest opinion. And I know of a lot of other attractive, smart well endowed females like me who agree... [/sarcasm]
Thats my input, and maybe I need to know more, but I feel lucky knowing the man I'm with may have find another female attractive(of course! A-DUH!), but doesn't plot or think about fucking her.(----run on sentence with lots of coma's)
And you all think we are confusing, shit please.
Elise,
If you think your man doesn't think about what it's like to have sex with another woman, he's either lying or you're naive, or both.
"Thinking about having sex with other people" does not equate to "plotting." Don't get it twisted. It's called "fantasies" which I think is a very healthy (and hardly immoral) element to human imagination.
Comments
3:17
What?! Let it go. ALL peeps can get herpes, GENERALLY the more sexual partners, the higher the likelihood of STDS. I'm not saying this cuz it gives me great playsure, dude, just cause it be true.
another theory of mine is that it's in the BEST INTEREST of your relationship with your wife / girlfriend / significant other that you get some strange stuff every now and then (safely, of course... and not TOO strange)... otherwise you may consciously or subconciously grow resentful at being handcuffed in monogamy and it will come out whether you want it to or not. Put your spoon in some other puddin' every now and then and it'll keep things fresh instead of it always being the same damn routine with the same damn puddin'. I'm trying to convince my wife that a concubine for me would be the best thing to keep our love alive forever. She's not buying it for some reason.
Sometimes, you wake up and you want something besides Cap'n Crunch. Sometimes you're in the mood for Lucky Charms.
my own 2 cents on guys/girls who cheat is that i don't trust them.
While I agree with the original sentiment of the post the way it was written was entirely juvenile and almost absurd. I don't want to "bone" every girl I see, but I sure want to bone many women who aren't the person I am dating.
In any case, my personal opinion is that any "gender" roles are all societal constructs. I think at the base level "attraction" is not hindered even by sex (in the sense that we are all bi-sexual creatures) but that by the negative societal view of homosexuality and polyamory we end up behaving as straight sex-deprived individuals in monogamous relationships.
This being said, our society is so ingrained in monogamy that trying to engage in polyamorous relationships mostly ends in disaster. I say this as someone who has tried. And being that monogamy has existed for as long as property relations and being that I don't see those going away anytime soon we are stuck with what we have.
So it's not the "women's" responsibility to come to terms with "man's nature" so much as our responsibility to do the best with the environment we are presented with.
NOW THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.
Real post-Cultural Studies Headz Know the Deal.
I'm assuming however, most people agree that promiscuity is not a male specific desire/issue. There are plenty of women on the creep. I think the disproportion of men who cheat is more reflective of the influence of patriarchy. In a traditional, male-dominated society, women typically have more to "lose" then men do if they're not faithful (start with financial support, move up to life). In a society with a different set of gender power relations, I could easily imagine different rates (or standards).
Depends on what you consider "human tendencies". I'm not sure either murder or rape are base human desires.
This is probably the most intelligent and on-point non music-related comment I have ever seen on SoulStrut. Amen.
I accept your apology, but let me still point out the way the original sentiment of the post was written was NOT entirely juvenile and almost absurd because I never said that every man wants to bone every girl they see, I said
i stand by that belief and the way that it was written. although i consider myself to be the MASTER of entirely juvenile and almost absurd soulstrut poasts, that particular poast was neither. in fact, i would go so far as to say it was the realest schitt i ever wrote
Hell I look at other women that I find beautiful. Now act on those thoughts of sex with another. Shit I'll tell if someone else on here admits some shit.
I'm thinking others CAN believe.
But do things like killing represent our animal nature? Also, what is natural for humans anyway? I don't know anything about this ish. I should have taken some sociology courses! I wish someone would start a thread about Dostoyevsky. There, I'd know what I was talking about.
I understand this sentiment, for sure...
But, monogamy has things to offer that promiscuity does NOT have.
It would just be nice if you didn't have to choose one or the other; you could just go on a day-by-day basis, you know?
yeah, but it gets worse when you get older... it's like "OMG, MY TRIM-GETTIN' TIME IS RUNNING OUT!!!" for example- i got this young fine lil chick at the local convenience store givin' me the "you-can-poke-this-out-if-you-want-it" look and i'm like daaam... i'm gettin' to the age where soon i ain't gonna GET too many chances like this without payin' for it! (which is just
I think attraction between people is a mix of biology, psychology and sociology and it's damn near impossible to parse. Studying chimps and bonobos might offer some interesting evolutionary contrasts but at the end of the day, our desire to fuck people (committed partners or otherwise) is a mix between the pull of our minds and our gonads.
Same goes for other "impulses". Desiring to kill people probably is a base human desire but it's likelihood of happening is conditioned by more than just biological instinct or sociology alone.
The original point is whether "monogamy" is natural or not and I guess what I'm saying is that it's not, either in terms of biological impulses or in terms of living in societies where the lure of sex is so thoroughly intermeshed into everyday media and cultural life.
Let's face it - American society, at the very least, is completely schizoid (if not hypocritical) when it comes to what it teaches about marriage on one hand and sex on the other. Blaming the desire for polyamorous liasions on biology is a simple way of eliding the social contradictions.
Unless of course, you are in an open relationship that is agreed upon.
Seems to me, men like that, have no self control and only nasty bitches bang men like that. No offense to anyone who may choose that lifestyle, but that is my honest opinion. And I know of a lot of other attractive, smart well endowed females like me who agree... [/sarcasm]
Thats my input, and maybe I need to know more, but I feel lucky knowing the man I'm with may have find another female attractive(of course! A-DUH!), but doesn't plot or think about fucking her.(----run on sentence with lots of coma's)
And you all think we are confusing, shit please.
my wife is less than amused that i found this funny. she said she's going to start looking for new spoons. i guess that means it's all good!!
shit, I'd say fuck spoons! Im looking for ladles!!!
I wonder what a relationship is like when
you can read the mind of your lover. Do you
consider mental telepathy a plus in your relationship?
Seriously - I can respect that you feel confident your
man would never cheat on you, and I agree that there are
millions of people out there that never would cheat on the
one they love. But if you think he never thinks about
having sex with another woman, either you are naive or he is
an incredibly unique individual.
Elise,
If you think your man doesn't think about what it's like to have sex with another woman, he's either lying or you're naive, or both.
"Thinking about having sex with other people" does not equate to "plotting." Don't get it twisted. It's called "fantasies" which I think is a very healthy (and hardly immoral) element to human imagination.