when's the last time you made a scene?

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  • FatbackFatback 6,746 Posts
    please fix your "you sound white" graemlim post. it's stretching this thread out too wide. i want his to be very readable. it's getting good. thanks.

  • You always hear about the "Little did he know, I was trained in martial arts" stories, but here we are...

    I like that you stuck in a little sidenote about skateshoes.
    It wasnt me man, frank is the ninja in this story.

  • FatbackFatback 6,746 Posts

    faget

    post of the year

    this whole fucking thread just gets better and better.

    with tobi and grandfather's permission i would like to combine their two stories into a screenplay about this little guy frank, who gets annoyed with all the turkish people in his country. so one day, after two turks get into a fight and spill blood on his skate shoes, he kicks the living shit out of the two dudes and their entire families....despite the fact that frank is 4' 10" and weighs 85lbs. see, little did they know, but frank is internationally ranked in his chosen discipline.

    ...and dedicates his life to promoting cultural diversity and tolerance.(by day)


  • faget

    post of the year

    this whole fucking thread just gets better and better.

    with tobi and grandfather's permission i would like to combine their two stories into a screenplay about this little guy frank, who gets annoyed with all the turkish people in his country. so one day, after two turks get into a fight and spill blood on his skate shoes, he kicks the living shit out of the two dudes and their entire families....despite the fact that frank is 4' 10" and weighs 85lbs. see, little did they know, but frank is internationally ranked in his chosen discipline.

    ...and dedicates his life to promoting cultural diversity and tolerance.(by day)

    The turks also use the word 'faget' alot. in tought bubbles, with spelling.


    oh and...

    please fix your you sound white graelim post. it's stretching this thread out too wide. i want his to be very readable. it's getting good. thanks.


  • ZEN2ZEN2 1,540 Posts
    please fix your "you sound white" graemlim post. it's stretching this thread out too wide. i want his to be very readable. it's getting good. thanks.







  • FatbackFatback 6,746 Posts
    please fix your "you sound white" graemlim post. it's stretching this thread out too wide. i want his to be very readable. it's getting good. thanks.







    ZING!

  • ZEN2ZEN2 1,540 Posts
    some of my friends are imaginary


    Not to beat a dead horse, but why is the response to an accusation of racism always "Some of my friends are [insert nationality / race]"?

    What the fuck is that supposed to prove?

  • SoulOnIceSoulOnIce 13,027 Posts
    some of my friends are imaginary


    Not to beat a dead horse, but why is the response to an accusation of racism always "Some of my friends are [insert nationality / race]"?

    What the fuck is that supposed to prove?


    About as much as - "I couldn't be racist - I listen to Black music!"


  • ZEN2ZEN2 1,540 Posts
    And btw, they don't count as a friend unless you know their last name, and hang out on the regular. It does not, for example, count if your "friend" is someone you routinely encounter in back alleys while beating up Jews.

  • FatbackFatback 6,746 Posts
    some of my friends are imaginary


    Not to beat a dead horse, but why is the response to an accusation of racism always "Some of my friends are [insert nationality / race]"?

    What the fuck is that supposed to prove?

    That you are a strategic racist. It's more highbrow. Kinda makes you admire motherfuckers who wave the confederate flag and make no bones about it.

  • ZEN2ZEN2 1,540 Posts
    some of my friends are imaginary


    Not to beat a dead horse, but why is the response to an accusation of racism always "Some of my friends are [insert nationality / race]"?

    What the fuck is that supposed to prove?

    That you are a strategic racist. It's more highbrow. Kinda makes you admire motherfuckers who wave the confederate flag and make no bones about it.


    Agreed.

    I can easily dismiss the ignorant fucks that sport southern relics on their pickups as being evolutionarily stagnant. The world always needs ditch diggers, right? (No offense to any ditch diggers who may post here.)

    Its the "I have a black friend" defense that always seems to get to me. Its obnoxious.

  • JustAliceJustAlice 1,308 Posts
    wow, so many of these stories are service industry related. While I have my fair share of bar stories of people causing a scene, most of my personal stories involve family....thats the way its supposed to be.

    I dont know why people feel like they have a special badge that allows them to yell and scream in public places, namely bars and clubs. I usually respond to them with a " Shut the fuck up, I'm trying to work here" kinda line.

    I once kicked a girl out of the club for asking for a glass of water. People dont realize that even on the busiest nights we can hear everything you say across the bar. She was talking shit and yelling at both of us, getting in front of people in line to ask us to fill her water glass. She was harassing my coworker and I for roughly 10 mins. I was ignoring her so it was pissing her off more. Finally She screams at me from the far end of the bar. " I NEED SOME WATER" I just look at her and say "Look, Im busy, Im fucking working here, you can wait your turn" She says something like " Duh, Your a bartender your supposed to be busy" And Im like..."it takes just as long to pour a glass of water as it does to pour a beer, everytime you yell at me your putting yourself back at the end of the line, if you need water that bad go fill it up at the WATER DISPENSER in the cornor" and then shes screams on the top of her lungs "Ittttttttts Emmmmmmpty!!!"

    I looked at the other bartender and barback and back to her and say " Your fucking done... Get the fuck out of here"

    I went out from the behind the bar because I wanted to drag her out myself...but the barback came and took over. I took a deep breath and got back to work and the people who she was standing next to tipped me 10 bucks on a 9 dollar tab.

    Again, I dont know why people feel like they have the pass to yell and scream in bars. Once I asked a group of bachelorettes to quite down and stop screaming and one girl responded..."but we are in a bar! we are just having fun"

    Have your fun, but dont act like children, they must think the bar is the grown up version of the playground.

  • PrimeCutsLtdPrimeCutsLtd jersey fresh 2,632 Posts
    thread of the day

  • FatbackFatback 6,746 Posts
    The world always needs ditch diggers, right? (No offense to any ditch diggers who may post here.)

    No, we have tractors. But do you have ditch digger friends?

  • DrJoelDrJoel 932 Posts

    faget

    post of the year

    this whole fucking thread just gets better and better.

    with tobi and grandfather's permission i would like to combine their two stories into a screenplay about this little guy frank, who gets annoyed with all the turkish people in his country. so one day, after two turks get into a fight and spill blood on his skate shoes, he kicks the living shit out of the two dudes and their entire families....despite the fact that frank is 4' 10" and weighs 85lbs. see, little did they know, but frank is internationally ranked in his chosen discipline.

    ...and dedicates his life to promoting cultural diversity and tolerance.(by day)

    I nominate:



    Ninja skills for days.

  • nzshadownzshadow 5,518 Posts
    Service industry indeed: i got stories for days, but this thread dosnt need them what this thread needs is more Grand father stories... that shit was pure poetry. Locations guys? one stop shop.

    this thread rules.

    and fear of a Turkish planet is genius.

    ok, continue.

  • ZEN2ZEN2 1,540 Posts
    The world always needs ditch diggers, right? (No offense to any ditch diggers who may post here.)

    No, we have tractors. But do you have ditch digger friends?


    I met a digger once. Now he's my friend.

    I'm white and I rock the digger gear:




    Does that make me a witch digger? Or a ditch wigger?

    I'm so confused...

  • ZEN2ZEN2 1,540 Posts
    --- Turkish?

  • nzshadownzshadow 5,518 Posts

  • FatbackFatback 6,746 Posts
    some of my friends are imaginary


    Not to beat a dead horse, but why is the response to an accusation of racism always "Some of my friends are [insert nationality / race]"?

    What the fuck is that supposed to prove?


    About as much as - "I couldn't be racist - I listen to Black music!"


    That one really is great.

    I mean, how can you be racist towards a group and, at the same time, be entertained by them? That level of cognitive dissonance just blows my fucking mind.



    "Just make sure to wash your ass first, boy. Can you spell that? Boy."

  • white_teawhite_tea 3,262 Posts
    Locations guys? one stop shop.


    OH, indeed

    --

  • ZEN2ZEN2 1,540 Posts





    Before you ask, the answer is no. I really have nothing better to do today.






  • Before you ask, the answer is no. I really have nothing better to do today.

    I was dying to think of a 'you sound turkish,' one as well...do that.

  • what this thread needs is more Grand father stories...

  • HAZHAZ 3,376 Posts
    some of my friends are imaginary


    Not to beat a dead horse, but why is the response to an accusation of racism always "Some of my friends are [insert nationality / race]"?

    What the fuck is that supposed to prove?


    About as much as - "I couldn't be racist - I listen to Black music!"


    That one really is great.

    I mean, how can you be racist towards a group and, at the same time, be entertained by them? That level of cognitive dissonance just blows my fucking mind.



    "Just make sure to wash your ass first, boy. Can you spell that? Boy."



    Someone get Guzzo here right now.

  • FatbackFatback 6,746 Posts
    Post deleted by missbassie

    what that all about?

  • HAZHAZ 3,376 Posts
    MEL GIBSON WANNABE

    Sometimes this dude is so on point. Excellent.

  • FatbackFatback 6,746 Posts
    some of my friends are imaginary


    Not to beat a dead horse, but why is the response to an accusation of racism always "Some of my friends are [insert nationality / race]"?

    What the fuck is that supposed to prove?


    About as much as - "I couldn't be racist - I listen to Black music!"


    That one really is great.

    I mean, how can you be racist towards a group and, at the same time, be entertained by them? That level of cognitive dissonance just blows my fucking mind.



    "Just make sure to wash your ass first, boy. Can you spell that? Boy."



    Someone get Guzzo here right now.

    I suspect this "Tobi" is a Guzzo alias. Bitch better have some alibis when he gets up in here. It's all too good to be true.

  • HAZHAZ 3,376 Posts
    Two weeks ago I was in a club with my girl and some friends. Everything was cool until a two groups of turkish guys started trouble. They started yelling at each other and pushing each other around. My girl stood next to them so I tried to calm the situation down. "C'mon guys, take it easy, where are here to have some fun, ok?" and so on...Suddenly one guy punched the other and broke his nose (well I guess it was broken, there was blood all over). While the guy wanted to retaliate I still tried to seperate the groups (I was mad drunk). After a while some members of the staff appeared and threw them out of the club. Suddenly my girl told me to take a look at my shirt which I bought like three days before. There was blood on the front and the back, I even had blood on my jeans and my shoes (not my blood of course). Now I was really pissed off and told my friends that I better go now.
    When I stepped out of the club two of the turkish guys still stood there and talked to each other. I walked up to them and yelled: "You fucking turkish bastards always start trouble! If you can't behave yourself go back where you came from! We don't need you here! If you want to kill each other it's fine with me, but don't do it in a club!" ...and so on...Don't get me wrong, I don't have a problem with turks, but I was mad as hell. After a while a member of the club's staff came and told me to stop (I think he is also turkish), but I told him the same and got even more mad until my girl pulled me away.
    Maybe I have reacted to rude, I don't know. But fact is I was very angry because of those idiots. Next time I walk away and let them beat each other up.

    I have a question for you dood:
















































    Istanbul or Constantinople?

  • nzshadownzshadow 5,518 Posts


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