World Cup sh*t tawk

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  • discos_almadiscos_alma discos_alma 2,164 Posts
    OK, fine, you guys can have tiddlywinks.

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,946 Posts
    We invent the stuff, the rest of the world consumes it. As we are a small country, RoW usually has the space and human resource to take it to the next level. Brazil and dem always looking to Island Ape for t3h realness.

    Football became The Beautiful Game.
    Rounders became your baseball.
    Rugby became your Football Hand-egg.
    Iambic Pentameter became your Rap.
    Stout became your Morbidly Obese.
    A falling apple became The Laws of Physics

    DENY IT AT YOUR PERIL.

    Enjoy your gongs and superb-owl rings and shiny-shinies for acting out Island Ape scripts with unnecessary braggadocio.

    The thread said sh*t tawk.

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    Yep, and we are surely talking it

    B/w

    Smfh at the state of that Manaus pitch.
    By the time Ronaldo vs meriman comes round it could give Teh US a good chance.
    You can't dribble at speed on corrugated iron, Ronnie son.

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,946 Posts
    Morris Dancing became Capoeira.

  • ppadilhappadilha 2,243 Posts
    Horseleech said:

    So the media here is full of horror stories about what a shit show these games are going to be because of poor planning/preparations - half built stadiums, 5 hour waits for cabs at overcrowded airports, labor strikes, 200 mile traffic jams to Sao Paulo etc. Is this scaremongering?

    90% of it is the usual scaremongering that comes before something like the World Cup in a country that is not Germany (if the Berlin airport was in Brazil the press would be bitching about it until the 22nd century). The wait for cabs and 200 mile traffic jams happen every day in São Paulo though, no matter the occasion. A lot of the transport stuff that was promised didn't get done but FIFA doesn't give a fuck about that, in the end they only care about what happens inside the stadiums.

    Everything will look great on the TV.

    I heard the dutch FA are planning their own parallel Oranje Fest for when they play here. Fuck yeah, maybe they'll bring some decent beer (I'll settle for Grolsch).

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    J i m s t e r said:
    Morris Dancing became Capoeira.

    Yes.
    And George Formby begat Jobim. Solo dude, primitive stringed instrument, grainy black and white film, prototype is all there. Girl From Ipanema is almost a direct lift from Leaning On A Lamp-post, shit is unmistakeable.

    Plus there is clear evidence (at least in my own private mind garden) that the famous samba rhythm is merely a slight embellishment on the rat-a-tat-tat so familiar from youthful games of Knock Down Ginger.

    And coffee? Tea wannabe. Don't get me started on that shit.

  • ppadilhappadilha 2,243 Posts
    There's a music school next to my office, sounds like a kid ganked one of the trombones and is warming up right now. The trombone is just a well-tuned vuvuzela really, isn't it?

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    True trombone-R story...

    Dude at work is somewhat sex-addicted, member of some closed shop Facebook group that organises random swinging parties.
    Anyways he gets invited to visit dudes house to take part in many-men-my-wife scenario. Never met any of them before.
    Gets there, strips off, there's four other blokes waiting their turn while two others service the wife, all in the same room, husband sitting in an armchair, just watching.
    My dude was feeling a bit sheepish, standing there aimless, looking round the room. He sees a brass instrument on the floor just under the bed. Looks over to husband: "is that a trumpet?"

    Husband: "no mate, it's a trombone.".

    Hubby picks it up and starts playing it.
    All whilst two strangers are roasting his missus and four others are silently standing there stark bollock naked with shlongs tumescent.
    He couldn't work out what tune was being played. Possibly some free jazz improv.

  • HarveyCanalHarveyCanal "a distraction from my main thesis." 13,234 Posts
    J i m s t e r said:
    We invent the stuff, the rest of the world consumes it. As we are a small country, RoW usually has the space and human resource to take it to the next level. Brazil and dem always looking to Island Ape for t3h realness.

    Football became The Beautiful Game.
    Rounders became your baseball.
    Rugby became your Football Hand-egg.
    Iambic Pentameter became your Rap.
    Stout became your Morbidly Obese.
    A falling apple became The Laws of Physics

    DENY IT AT YOUR PERIL.

    Enjoy your gongs and superb-owl rings and shiny-shinies for acting out Island Ape scripts with unnecessary braggadocio.

    The thread said sh*t tawk.

    Can't make out your Queen's English(?) with all that mayonnaise seeping from your piehole.

  • jleejlee 1,539 Posts
    I know the topic of why US hates/loves SOCCER gets re-hashed each and every 4 years here in the States, but the Freakonomics dudes did a podcast today about the situation...pretty interesting

    http://freakonomics.com/2014/06/12/why-america-doesnt-love-soccer-yet-a-new-freakonomics-radio-podcast/

    I'm hype for this world cup --- got the chance to see US play a warm up against vs Turkey a few weeks back. Not expecting any miracles, but I do think the US dudes will do better than most expect -- even if it's just putting in effort that gets Ghana/Portugal a little shook. I suspect Germany will roll us.

  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,946 Posts
    I went to pick up #2 son from school last week and I could hear the kids in the music room playing Miles' "Milestones" on recorders.

    True story.

    Even though it was, y'know, a bit rough, it still brought a tear to my eye.

    #2 son seems more musical than #1. Says he wants to play trumpet.






    I told him he could forget about that. Man got no time to brook nascent high-frequency caterwauling and such.

    Could have been worse...

    ..DRUMS.

  • HarveyCanalHarveyCanal "a distraction from my main thesis." 13,234 Posts
    jlee said:
    I suspect Germany will roll us.

    Yes, you and Adolf Klinsmann.

  • dukeofdelridgedukeofdelridge urgent.monkey.mice 2,453 Posts
    The ball is spherical. There are lots of dudes running around. USA will be among them.

  • dukeofdelridgedukeofdelridge urgent.monkey.mice 2,453 Posts
    I've watched enough sport to do the maths bruv: feeling better and better about USAUSAUSA chances each time you silly billies pick against them oh I mean us.

  • HarveyCanal said:
    jlee said:
    I suspect Germany will roll us.

    Yes, you and Adolf Klinsmann.

    you raaaaaaaang?


  • FlomotionFlomotion 2,390 Posts
    J i m s t e r said:
    I went to pick up #2 son from school last week and I could hear the kids in the music room playing Miles' "Milestones" on recorders.

    True story.

    Even though it was, y'know, a bit rough, it still brought a tear to my eye.

    #2 son seems more musical than #1. Says he wants to play trumpet.






    I told him he could forget about that. Man got no time to brook nascent high-frequency caterwauling and such.

    Could have been worse...

    ..DRUMS.

    Drums is where it's at. I jumped at the chance to trade in #1 son's trumpet/recorder sonic warfare combo for a electronic drum kit and a pair of headphones. Now That's What I Call (barely audible) Music.

  • b/w france ain't winning shit, but they've got the best home and away kits.

  • HarveyCanalHarveyCanal "a distraction from my main thesis." 13,234 Posts
    Before anyone sh*t tawks me on USA USA USA. I'm Italia all day over Newbieland. I still wish well, but they'ze ain't MY team.

    Now to take care of Snakes Britain...

  • "Football is a simple game. Twenty-two men chase a ball for 90 minutes and at the end, the Germans always win."

    Gary Lineker, British Football/Broadcaster

  • DJFerrariDJFerrari 2,411 Posts
    Viva Brasil! I'm already getting made fun of at the office for wearing my Brazilian jersey.

    So I put together a bit of a megamix of Brazilian beats that I figured I'd share here.


  • HarveyCanal said:
    Before anyone sh*t tawks me on USA USA USA. I'm Italia all day over Newbieland. I still wish well, but they'ze ain't MY team.

    Now to take care of Snakes Britain...


    Always a highlight of any tournament, seeing Italy lose. Hopefully it will start on Saturday.
    We'll take a Ray Houghton moment!!

  • HarveyCanalHarveyCanal "a distraction from my main thesis." 13,234 Posts
    badder_than_evil said:



    Always a highlight of any tournament, seeing Italy lose.

    Yeah, how'd that work out for you in 2006?


  • LokoOneLokoOne 1,823 Posts
    HarveyCanal said:
    Before anyone sh*t tawks me on USA USA USA. I'm Italia all day over Newbieland. I still wish well, but they'ze ain't MY team.

    Now to take care of Snakes Britain...

    Didnt know Austin was in Italia ;) And Italy has never really 'won' a World Cup they just got it on default a few times when the other champion teams didnt bother to show up. Mafungulo!

    And you guys know those 2 world cups Italy got in 34 n 38 really belong to Argentina, right? The players just put on the wrong jersey by accident. Some Mussolini sleight of hand bizness.

    I have the best position when it comes to the World Cup. Being an Argie from Australia means I got the two best teams in the world to cheer for. ;P

    BTW I cant get that trombone wife gangbang story image out my head. Classic shit.

  • DORDOR Two Ron Toe 9,902 Posts
    LETS GO!

  • SUSS FACTOR ALREADY AT 100%

  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    Tonight was madness in the town

    Chaos

  • HarveyCanal said:
    badder_than_evil said:



    Always a highlight of any tournament, seeing Italy lose.

    Yeah, how'd that work out for you in 2006?

    Fantastic..Italy won nothing.

  • parallaxparallax no-style-having mf'er 1,266 Posts
    skel said:
    True trombone-R story...

    Dude at work is somewhat sex-addicted, member of some closed shop Facebook group that organises random swinging parties.
    Anyways he gets invited to visit dudes house to take part in many-men-my-wife scenario. Never met any of them before.
    Gets there, strips off, there's four other blokes waiting their turn while two others service the wife, all in the same room, husband sitting in an armchair, just watching.
    My dude was feeling a bit sheepish, standing there aimless, looking round the room. He sees a brass instrument on the floor just under the bed. Looks over to husband: "is that a trumpet?"

    Husband: "no mate, it's a trombone.".

    Hubby picks it up and starts playing it.
    All whilst two strangers are roasting his missus and four others are silently standing there stark bollock naked with shlongs tumescent.
    He couldn't work out what tune was being played. Possibly some free jazz improv.

    This is one of the best posts I've ever read.

  • .....
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