Having Kids: Worth It or Hell No!?

RAJ

Discuss:

leftybanks

You bitter, son!

(Worth it. But the cost is heavy!)

funky16corners

The single best thing I've ever done in my life.

deathvalley90210

in my experience, yes.

JRoot

Worth it. Way worth it.

RAJ

You bitter, son!

(Worth it. But the cost is heavy!)

Now... I couldn't imagine any Strut Parents on here saying "Hell No! Kids suck". Certainly, we all have our days but overall they rule and it is worth the blood, sweat, and tears.

I would just like hear from the folks who don't think they will have kids and why they are making that choice.

NateBizzo

I find out the sex of our baby tomorrow; I'm freaking out. I freaked out even harder this week when I felt the little bastard kicking the shit out of my wifes tummy.

I've also gotten the beat down from my wife on my excessive spending on "teh raer". A serious verbal beatdown actually.

phongone

Worth it. Ask the expert!

Cosmo

I find out the sex of our baby tomorrow; I'm freaking out. I freaked out even harder this week when I felt the little bastard kicking the shit out of my wifes tummy.

I've also gotten the beat down from my wife on my excessive spending on "teh raer". A serious verbal beatdown actually.

NATE! Dude that's what's up... F*ck yeah man!

And that picture above is nasty as shit, but maybe it's because I find that woman repulsive.

holmes

I am battling with this question myself at the moment.

Big_Chan

I would just like hear from the folks who don't think they will have kids and why they are making that choice.

Hi Raj,

My ex-wife never wanted to have kids and I have NO plans to ever get married again. Only way I would get married again is maybe like Maggie Cheung with a very safe pre-nup in place! LOL. I am real old school so I would not want to have kids if I was not married. No kids for me. If I had kids I would have to seriously alter my baller party lifestyle.

DJBombjack

Before we had our girl it was hard to imagine life with a kid. Now I can't imagine life without one.

jlee

I'd be curious to know if any of the folks with kids were ever planning to not have children at all with their significant other.

i'm not talking about the "i'm 25, F*ck kidz, lets get drunk", but the "we are a married/established couple and have no intentions to have kids".

the reason i ask, is because it seems like most folks with children either:
1. always planned on having them, so of course it's worth it
2. had a 'surprise' and have considered themselves blessed since then.

i personally don't know too many adults who at > 30-35 ever changed course if they were already on the track to not have kids. i'm certain they exist, I just would be curious to hear how they feel.

Gary

I love having a baby.

Garcia_Vega

Its worth it, until they turn 3, its all downhill from there ;-)

JRoot

I find out the sex of our baby tomorrow

Yeah! Before our daughter was born, I was more or less indifferent between the two sexes, but if I had to choose, I woulda chosen boy, just because that's what I know and so it was easier to imagine myself raising up a boy. But now that we have a girl, I don't know what I'd do with a boy.

We didn't find out until born day, and it was awesome.

Congratulations Nate!!!!

LoopDreams

Seven years in, with a 7 yr old and a 4 yr old and another in the oven...

Of course it's worth it. Though here's the rub: it's never a good time to have a kid, never. They show up and you work them into your life.

That said there won't be any more showing up in my life, it's the snip for me .

Nate: congrats... you think your trippin now, just wait for the birth, your in for a ride.

leftybanks

Maggie Cheung with a very safe pre-nup in place!

You got more money than Maggie Cheung?

leftybanks

I'd be curious to know if any of the folks with kids were ever planning to not have children at all with their significant other.

i'm not talking about the "i'm 25, F*ck kidz, lets get drunk", but the "we are a married/established couple and have no intentions to have kids".

the reason i ask, is because it seems like most folks with children either:
1. always planned on having them, so of course it's worth it
2. had a 'surprise' and have considered themselves blessed since then.

i personally don't know too many adults who at > 30-35 ever changed course if they were already on the track to not have kids. i'm certain they exist, I just would be curious to hear how they feel.

I'm personally curious if there are many stable, secure childless couples in their 30s who get accidentally pregnant and decided to abort or put the child up for adoption.

Rockadelic

Its worth it, until they turn 3, its all downhill from there ;-)

LOL....I'm exactly the opposite.....3 is when the fun begins!

holmes

Teenagers are hell :unfathomable stupidity: I am consistently amazed in our house to say the least.

Supergood

You have articulated my thoughts better than I ever could. My wife and I are pretty much in the same boat as you - down to the letter - but we're just a little older than you. However, the thought of possibly regretting NOT having kids has been causing us some amount of anxiety lately.

The big one for me is #3. The relationship I have with my own folks is strained, so I would hate for my offspring to resent me in a similar fashion.

First off, props to everyone having and taking care of their babies and being good parents.

That said, Raj asked, so here goes. As of right now I plan on no kids in the near future, for at least these reasons:

1. I'm not sure I'd really enjoy raising kids. I am aware that everyone with kids thinks its worth it, but do they enjoy changing diapers, going to the principal's office, disciplining, teaching, finding babysitters, driving to piano practice, dealing with hockey dads/soccer moms/basketball parents, worrying when they stay out late, paying for a college education, having them never call you, getting old alone and disliked by your children (like all 4 of my grandparents) and so on and so on and so on? I just don't think I want to make the investment.

2. There's other things I do want to invest in, like exploring the world once I've got a secure and comfortable income. I'm aiming at a job that affords flexible free time, and I want to use that to spend months on the beach/in the mountains/learning the language/going on safari/all the rest of that jazz. I'm 31, have done a good bit of getting around, and am only looking to do more. Having kids is going to put all that on hold at best.

3. What if your kid is a jerk? I mean, I'm a loving guy and I know every parent loves their kid no matter what, but every jerk has a mom and dad too, and if they're loving parents then they love a jerk. I kind of don't want to take that risk. See "Growing old alone" up in reason #1.

Caveat: I recognize that this may change as I grow older, but for now I just feel no need for wee ones in my life.

The_Non

I don't want kids. I like having $. At least not til I'm 50 or some shit.

Frank

You have articulated my thoughts better than I ever could. My wife and I are pretty much in the same boat as you - down to the letter - but we're just a little older than you. However, the thought of possibly regretting NOT having kids has been causing us some amount of anxiety lately.

The big one for me is #3. The relationship I have with my own folks is strained, so I would hate for my offspring to resent me in a similar fashion.

First off, props to everyone having and taking care of their babies and being good parents.

That said, Raj asked, so here goes. As of right now I plan on no kids in the near future, for at least these reasons:

1. I'm not sure I'd really enjoy raising kids. I am aware that everyone with kids thinks its worth it, but do they enjoy changing diapers, going to the principal's office, disciplining, teaching, finding babysitters, driving to piano practice, dealing with hockey dads/soccer moms/basketball parents, worrying when they stay out late, paying for a college education, having them never call you, getting old alone and disliked by your children (like all 4 of my grandparents) and so on and so on and so on? I just don't think I want to make the investment.

2. There's other things I do want to invest in, like exploring the world once I've got a secure and comfortable income. I'm aiming at a job that affords flexible free time, and I want to use that to spend months on the beach/in the mountains/learning the language/going on safari/all the rest of that jazz. I'm 31, have done a good bit of getting around, and am only looking to do more. Having kids is going to put all that on hold at best.

3. What if your kid is a jerk? I mean, I'm a loving guy and I know every parent loves their kid no matter what, but every jerk has a mom and dad too, and if they're loving parents then they love a jerk. I kind of don't want to take that risk. See "Growing old alone" up in reason #1.

Caveat: I recognize that this may change as I grow older, but for now I just feel no need for wee ones in my life.

Lucky for me, my wife doesn't want kids either.
I'm 41 and the older I get, the less I could imagine ever wanting any.

Rockadelic

Worth it even if they are a pain in the ass from time to time.

Having been through it from beginning to end I'll offer some advice to those of you who do choose to have kids.

The more time you spend with them the more you get in return.

They are your biggest responsibility....EVAR.

Discipline them young and you won't have to later on.

Don't discipline them young and you won't be able to later on.

Never lie to them....tell the truth about everything even if it's uncomfortable.

and what I think is the most important one......

NEVER FORGET WHAT YOU WERE LIKE AT THEIR AGE AND DON'T EXPECT THEM TO BE ANY BETTER/DIFFERENT THAN YOU WERE!!

If you do all the above this last one will take care of itself.

Supergood

The more time you spend with them the more you get in return.

From what I've observed in my own family and in the families of my friends, this is very true.

coolchris

Worth it even if they are a pain in the ass from time to time.

Having been through it from beginning to end I'll offer some advice to those of you who do choose to have kids.

The more time you spend with them the more you get in return.

They are your biggest responsibility....EVAR.

Discipline them young and you won't have to later on.

Don't discipline them young and you won't be able to later on.

Never lie to them....tell the truth about everything even if it's uncomfortable.

and what I think is the most important one......

NEVER FORGET WHAT YOU WERE LIKE AT THEIR AGE AND DON'T EXPECT THEM TO BE ANY BETTER/DIFFERENT THAN YOU WERE!!

If you do all the above this last one will take care of itself.

Trust the Rock, he's a great Dad and his Girls are super cool.
I got a four year old girl and she just said the word Sexy.
I'm scared!

SelinaKyle83

I used to be indifferent to the idea of having my own but after seeing cousins and friends and even the crap and drama that goes along with it i couldn't imagine not..........JUST NOT FOR ANOTHER COUPLE YEARS AT LEAST, FINGERS CROSSED!!

NateBizzo

I used to be indifferent to the idea of having my own but after seeing cousins and friends and even the crap and drama that goes along with it i couldn't imagine not..........JUST NOT FOR ANOTHER COUPLE YEARS AT LEAST, FINGERS CROSSED!!

If you can stay away from BATMON you should be OK.

Bsides

I'm 28, but I already know that I want kids. I have to be in the right situation financially and relationship wise, which is still nowhere on my horizon even lol.

But I couldn't imagine not having kids. People do it, sure. But at some point i think spending time and energy on yourself has to get old.

Maybe just one kid.

I dunno. I just got a cat though. Im really enjoying that. Kids can definitely wait.

keithvanhorn

I'm 28, but I already know that I want kids. I have to be in the right situation financially and relationship wise, which is still nowhere on my horizon even lol.

i feel like this too, but its a bit of a cop-out. my parents were young and broke when they had me and so were my wife's parents. the culture back then was much different. now it seems everyone of my peers ( mostly college educated/working professionals) has this same feeling of reaching financial comfort before having kids. aren't we missing out on being young moms and dads? isn't there some pluses to playing ball with your son while you can still dunk?