Quote:/font1h, 21b, 21b, 21b, 21"You've been drinking muddy water again" - when somebody stands in the way of something you were looking at, usually the TV, inferring that the mud content is preventing the normal ability to see straight through somebody. b, 21b, 21h, 21
b, 21b, 21b, 21I've never heard that one. My mom used to say to us kids "You make a better door than a window" in those same situations. I say that all the time now.
i've never heard anybody else say this, but a few years back my great-uncle (r.i.p.) was dropping some growing-up-in-the-depression gems on me. he was talking about he and my grandfather used lie down on the kitchen floor in the house they grew up in and watch their cats and dogs run around under the house--they could see the ground through the gaps in the floorboards. in describing this, he said that the floor was "more holy than righteous." that shit killed me. that's next-level punning.
Someone dumb is "sharp as a bowling ball", I use that a lot.b, 21b, 21My wife often says that her friend who won't shut up "could talk a glass eye to sleep". She also threatens our kids that she'll "have their guts for garters".
Quote:/font1h, 21b, 21/font1Quote:/font1h, 21b, 21b, 21b, 21"You've been drinking muddy water again" - when somebody stands in the way of something you were looking at, usually the TV, inferring that the mud content is preventing the normal ability to see straight through somebody. b, 21b, 21h, 21
b, 21b, 21b, 21I've never heard that one. My mom used to say to us kids "You make a better door than a window" in those same situations. I say that all the time now. b, 21b, 21h, 21b, 21b, 21In my house growing up we always went with "your a pain but I can't see through you".
sweating like a whore in church.b, 21it's hotter than two squirrels havin sex in a wool sock.b, 21b, 21my sister often describes the weather in the greater phoenix metropolitan area with one of those. i have no idea where she picked them up.
Quote:/font1h, 21b, 21/font1Quote:/font1h, 21b, 21my grandpa drops: 'Wait a while' a lot.b, 21b, 21in place of 'hold on', 'just a second', etc. b, 21b, 21h, 21
b, 21b, 21Hold your horses. b, 21b, 21h, 21b, 21b, 21b, 21i picked up, "Easssssy Trigger" from an old dude a couple years ago.
Quote:/font1h, 21b, 21/font1Quote:/font1h, 21b, 21From my dad:b, 21b, 21Want another beer?b, 21b, 21"Is the Pope Catholic?" or "Does a bear shit in the woods?" b, 21b, 21h, 21
b, 21b, 21or the hybrid model:b, 21b, 21"does the pope shit in the woods?" i think this is from lebowski. b, 21b, 21h, 21b, 21b, 21"Does Rose Kennedy own a black dress?"
Quote:/font1h, 21b, 21on the molassess tip, "he/she was driving slower than molassess uphill in the winter time."b, 21b, 21- "FUBAR"b, 21b, 21/font1Quote:/font1h, 21b, 21"Does a bear shit in the woods?"b, 21b, 21h, 21
b, 21b, 21fu*cking awesome. one of my favorites. b, 21b, 21h, 21b, 21b, 21See also "Does a cat have an ass?"b, 21b, 21b, 21/font1Quote:/font1h, 21b, 21When I would wish for something around pops he would drop "Well, you can wish in one hand and shit in the other then see which one fills up quicker" b, 21b, 21h, 21b, 21b, 21That's one of my all-time favorites. There are two "polite company" versions, too: "Wish in one hand, shell peanuts in the other" and "Wish in one hand, spit in the other...."
heres a couple I use and a lot I know just off the top of the head. I love b, 21using old expressions and also making my own up. b, 21b, 21"few cards short of a full deck"b, 21"not the sharpest knife in the drawer"b, 21"he's got some hard bark on him"b, 21"hotter than the forth of july"b, 21b, 21"if the glove fits"b, 21"when in rome" I like using these at inappropriate timesb, 21b, 21"like a cat on a hot tin roof"b, 21"when the shit hits the fan"b, 21"If you can't beat em join em"b, 21"I'll keep mum" keeping quite, keeping a secretb, 21"he/she's is looking like a tall glass of water"b, 21"Pot calling the kettle black"b, 21"rule of thumb" classic...the original meaning is foul thoughb, 21"catching a lot of heck"b, 21"sticks and stones"b, 21"denile isn't just a river in egypt" I don't know if this is old timeyb, 21"You can bring a horse to water but you can't make him drink"b, 21"everything but the kitchen sink"b, 21"I like the cut of your jib"b, 21"top of the morning" said with a stupid English accentb, 21"They're going to have kittens!!" I love this one, either means there b, 21going to be excited or angry, I'm not sure but I still use it.b, 21b, 21"let sleeping dogs lie"b, 21"when it rains it pours"b, 21"looks like a storms a brewin" I say this even on clear days, in a whisperb, 21"kill two birds with one stone"b, 21"well call me susan!"b, 21"sounds kind of witchy to me"b, 21"colder than a witches teet"b, 21"don't bring a knife to a gun fight"b, 21"bet your bottom dollar"b, 21"he/she is a rube" means that they're a hick, can't say I've ever found a b, 21place to use it... unfortunately some of these don't come to mind when you b, 21need 'emb, 21"he/she is a grifter" swindler or thiefb, 21b, 21"top shelf"b, 21"gee-whiz"b, 21"golly"b, 21"hot dog!"b, 21"aww shucks"b, 21"dang" I usually say these sarcasticallyb, 21b, 21Some of my own b, 21==============b, 21b, 21"Hey if you pull a dogs whiskers it'll bark" usually used in agreement or b, 21to fortify another statementb, 21b, 21"Would you put your dick in a fan?" More of just a rhetorical question, b, 21could be used to answer any questionb, 21b, 21"like a bag of wet mice" I think I got this from a talk show interview, I b, 21use it to describe something I don't like. Rarely find a place for itb, 21b, 21"lousy mouth breathers" Used to describe stupid people. Again usually b, 21forget to use itb, 21b, 21"kind of like your mom" I honestly don't know if I made this up or not. It b, 21has the same function as "that's what she said". I don't use it much as it b, 21is usually more offensive.b, 21b, 21p.s. best thread ever
dont try to piss on me and tell me its rainingb, 21b, 21(polite version: dont try to pour a bucket of water/milk on me and tell me its raining)b, 21b, 21meaning: dont try to pass off bullshit as truth
"on account of"b, 21b, 21this used to be used in place of "because of"b, 21b, 21The Beav used to say this a lotb, 21b, 21"we had to stay after school on account of larry mondello farting in miss landers' class"
Quote:/font1h, 21b, 21/font1Quote:/font1h, 21b, 21"on it like a bonnet"b, 21b, 21b, 21"out like a trout"b, 21b, 21b, 21b, 21etc.b, 21b, 21i use those way too much. b, 21b, 21h, 21
b, 21b, 21"off like a prom dress" img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/bbb.gif" alt="" 21 b, 21b, 21h, 21b, 21b, 21My dad always says: Off like a brides nightie...v old fashioned indeed
Has anyone heard of the phrase "gay as a maypole?" I find myself using it thinking it's got some old-time provenance. Perhaps I just made it up. b, 21b, 21I only use it to describe actual gay people. Like "well shit, he's gay as a maypole so she needs to stop sweating him." Otherwise I say, "girl-wearing-a-skirt-as-a-top as a maypole."
Comments