chicago: pulling up the roots
james
chicago 1,863 Posts
I am sad to report that, having done his time battling the shitstem here in Chicaga???s hustlin??? bustle, the one JRoot is packing his carpetbag for where people wear pajamas and live life slow: late next week, dude is moving down South(ish) to rope-a-dope the evil with righteous bobbin??? and weavin???, deep in the Mizzurahdome. Thus, I???m putting the call out any and all of my Chicago-rillas (seriously, how corny is that shit?) who wanna???uh!???come on down! to Gaylord???s Indian at 1:00 this coming Tuesday and send my man off on a wave of mango-lassi. To those of you that have met Root, come say ???hi??? and ???bye,??? and to those of you who have not, don???t miss what will almost certainly be your last and only chance to rub elbows with the often-heard-about but seldom-scene Maltese Sasquatch of the ChiStrut community. Perhaps meaty will show up and we can argue about whose cheeks are rosier. Whatever the case, whosoever is interested needs to put their quarter up right here in this thread so we know what all we???re looking at???those familiar know that the maitre???d down there at the ???Lords does not play when it comes to the seating (???Yo, is it okay if I just pull this chair up here???? ???No, it is not.???), so a reasonably accurate headcount is a must. Root, Clubbuppington, and myself are all sure things like Nicollette Sheridan, but the rest of y???all need to holler. All are welcome, you just gotta make it known a little ahead of time, is all.I am saying:Gaylord???s India678 N. Clark Chicago (you dummy)(312) 664-1700Tuesday, July 25No cover1:00pm until?Cover: Gents ??? Free! Ladies ??? Unlikely!
AN INCH BELOW THE TURF
BACK THAT ASS UP
MO PROBLEMS
AN INCH BELOW THE TURFBACK THAT ASS UPMO PROBLEMS
Comments
I say we all send him off in style too...record night style. But of course this is all up to his schedule of busyness business. I am hereby opening up Terry_Clubbup's new North Side abode to all those wanting to attend. Yeah?
Show me,
JRoot
I had some of that yellow puddin stuff at a different Indian buffet yesterday that was...
fruitier than Gaylords.
That is so funny. I was at Gaylord's back in the 20-ought-1 and it went down just this way.
To Jeru(t), here's to fighting Ignorance, and his mob: hatred, jealously, and envy.
Yes and yes.
i'm planning on attending because i want to meet some more chi-strutters in person...
I've taken to saving all the emails he sends in a
personalspecial folder simply because they are such a fucking joy to read. Africa, movies, children's stories, nesting robins, fecal sacs, eugenics. Topics as wide and far-reaching as the "show me" state, no doubt. While his moving probably won't prevent me from receiving these special emails (do they even have the internet down there?), I knew this would be one thread he was likely to open.Insert comment bemoaning the "death of the strut" and the loss of valuable members to our "community."It should be said again that JRoot was entirely responsible for get the heat back into our rocks. His swift salvo skills made paypal put they game on pause and check they drawls. A few sleepless nights wondering what the fuck I got everyone into were soother by phone calls from JRoot (w/ newborn, traveling for work, and staying up til unreasonable hours defending his kin or working on his briefs -- delicious) assuring me he'd have it sewn up in a matter of minutes. When you answer the phone and the first words you hear (before you even have time to ask for help) are, "I've read their Terms and Conditions and found the pertinent areas to your current situation, which I am forwarding to you now," there is really no other feeling like it in the world, much less Missouri. Through it all I learned JRoot and I had been working for the same company for three years. "Pouch Me" isn't just a Hermism anymore.
Thank you JRoot for exemplary heatrockery and saving our collective dough from the clutches of the ugly.
Safe travels.
Bye robin's nest.
ModorSoullessDaysAreOver.
You get a pass, whoadie; the bunker mentality of the new parent is real as fuck--I can sympathize. Make it if you can.
Here's the tally-whack as it stands at this day and time:
JRoot
Terry_Clubbup
dCastillo
luck
TSG
pickwick33
james
and we'll save some space for young meaty (though Young Meaty sounds like one of those magazines that's illegal to send through the mail).
Anyone else who's trying to get down needs to post up between now and, say, tomorrow morning, lest you end up slurping your own saag at a card table by the coat room.
Add 2 to the list maybe 3 if dcarf wants to ride along.
(meep meep) risa would like to be there
....i think i have a spare TUESDAY mousestash for this occasion
JRoot
Terry_Clubbup
dCastillo
luck
TSG
pickwick33
james
zilla
counterpernt
possibly meatyogurt
possibly DCarzagnut
and a cameo (oww!) by Dreas
I'm shitty with numbers, so I'm just gonna call up my man and make a reservation for "a whole gang of folks." (Even though as near as I can tell the only difference between having a reservation and not having a reservation is that if you have a reservation they will at least apologize to you while they make you wait a long time for a table.)
If I see you there, I will see you there.
...
Yeah, the "Gaylord India" name is comparable to something like "Cambridge House": They exist everywhere, but folks are always mildy surprised to find out that there's one somewhere else.
We anxiously awaited the arrival of Conway West (or was it Kanye Twitty)?
Neither showed, but JP skipped on the bill.
haha. $1.30 each?
the beach was chill.
Hammock?
You fuckers. I had 4 more hours of meaningless work left. Why is it impossible to have a Mafia meetup when one tries to?
Everybody in attendance received a Geraldine Fibbers 7".
A poor consolation prize for the loss of the Root doctor, but
na'ar record nerd has been known to look a Nels Cline-related
promo in the mouth.
Good luck, JRoot.
but didnt diss yall,
are yall pissed yall?
then get the fist yall!
cuz im mad yall!
and im sad yall!
and im badder than bad
but not glad yall!
beach no hammock, but pyramids & sunglasses were in full effeck.
anyhow, Jeremy, it's sad to see you go. ESPECIALLY since we all never had an official record wastedness night. (I believe that term is being copyrighted right at this moment). Anyhow, y'all gotta invite us down sometime. Chicago needs to go Jansportin'. (Thes-1 already copyrighted that!
Officially demoted to "pickwick20" until he makes with the thirteen bucks.
I mean, I'm not mad--I'm the calm one; hi-ever, as Bobby Rush ("the due-process one, not the 'do-process one" - ??lubbup) might say, Rob Zilla also put five on it, and--as he has ample time to contemplate retaliation, revenge, and get-back--you never know when that dude's gonna just whyle out and show up at your job with some numbchucks or something. What lurks beneath the white tee? Consider yourself warneded.
(Just kidding, J***s; it was good to see you. Just get me--or Rob, whoever you see first--next time.)
...
"Beach"?! Zinka hand-styles for miles, I'm sure. I'm picturing y'all in olden-style "swimming costumes," like, the one-piece jernts with suspenders, slightly sped-up for a Hard Day's Night/Benny Hill effect. If I'm wrong, don't tell me.
...
But, yeah, what Terry said. 1997-vintage Geraldine Fibbers deadstock = too little payment for so great a debt. JR will be sorely missed, both in his concrete presence and in his abstract ballast. Buena suerte, Root. Show 'em.
NOW I AIN'T SAYING SHE'S A COAL DIGGER...