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can someone please explain shakira?

Mongo_SladeMongo_Slade 999 Posts
edited July 2006 in Strut Central
I've been vaguely aware of Shakira, or at least her name, for a while but don't know that I actually heard anything by her before "Hips Don't Lie."Which may be one of the worst songs I've ever heard.Even discounting the non-Shakira elements of the song that I hate (Wyclef) or dislike (the french horns), etc.-- which by the way are like a catalog of shit I loathe-- I find the appeal of the song totally mystifying. I mean what the fuck is up with her vocal? Does she always sing with that bizarre brogue like the chick from the Cranberries?I get a fair number of requests for it, usually from unusually attractive Spanish girls who rub their tatas on me as they make the request (which, by the way, is a really good way to receive a request), but can't for the life of me bring myself to play it.

  Comments

  • deejdeej 5,125 Posts
    "Underneath My Clothes" and that song where she says her breasts are small and humble are pretty good. This song is pretty shitty.
  • BigSpliffBigSpliff 3,266 Posts
    She used to sing in Spanish. She's still learning English. She's quite hott.
  • faux_rillzfaux_rillz 14,343 Posts
    "Underneath My Clothes" and that song where she says her breasts are small and humble are pretty good. This song is pretty shitty.

    Edit your post--that song is the jam!
  • deejdeej 5,125 Posts
    "Underneath My Clothes" and that song where she says her breasts are small and humble are pretty good. This song is pretty shitty.

    Edit your post--that song is the jam!
    Wyclef, dude.
  • Mongo_SladeMongo_Slade 999 Posts
    "Underneath My Clothes" and that song where she says her breasts are small and humble are pretty good. This song is pretty shitty.

    Okay, word, I can roll with small and humble breasts.
  • Jonny_PaycheckJonny_Paycheck 17,825 Posts
    the lyrics to many of her songs are unintentionally funny

    Other than that, she is ungodly hot
  • PonyPony 2,283 Posts
    Which may be one of the worst songs I've ever heard.

    The only thing that could make this song worse is Wyclef's fake Bob Marley singing (as witnessed on Chapelle Show). NAGL
  • JLRJLR 3,835 Posts
    she's colombian and she has been polluting the southamerican airwaves since the mid '90s. I can tell you this: she was not THAT hot back then. She has been real-life photoshopped. She was fat. One day some marketing genius decided she had to invade the first world. Crossover shit. Now there you have her.
  • edith headedith head 5,106 Posts
    the lyrics to many of her songs are unintentionally funny

    Other than that, she is ungodly hot

    somebody please post some lyrics


    i do not like that style of singing at all. it's almost like yodelling

    today is slow and i'm feeling the strong urge photoshop shakira into some lederhosen
  • TREWTREW 2,037 Posts
    she sounds better when she's sticks to singing in spanish.

    but yeah, wyclef..
  • funkyexamplefunkyexample 915 Posts
    I am surprised no one has dropped some images into this thread...
  • sticky_dojahsticky_dojah New York City. 2,136 Posts
    I totally hate her voice and her singing, really makes me aggressive...but she has a duet with ja rule;)

    http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/256256

    just click on the movie
  • Jonny_PaycheckJonny_Paycheck 17,825 Posts
    the lyrics to many of her songs are unintentionally funny

    Other than that, she is ungodly hot

    somebody please post some lyrics

    OK!

    Youre a song
    Written by the hands of god
    Dont get me wrong cause
    This might sound to you a bit odd
    But you own the place
    Where all my thoughts go hiding
    And right under your clothes
    Is where I'll find them

    Underneath your clothes
    Theres an endless story
    Theres the man I chose
    Theres my territory
    And all the things I deserve
    For being such a good girl honey

    Because of you
    I forgot the smart ways to lie
    Because of you
    Im running out of reasons to cry
    When the friends are gone
    When the partys over
    We will still belong to each other

    Underneath your clothes
    Theres an endless story
    Theres the man I chose
    Theres my territory
    And all the things I deserve
    For being such a good girl honey

    Underneath your clothes
    Theres an endless story
    Theres the man I chose
    Theres my territory
    And all the things I deserve
    For being such a good girl
    For being such a yeah...

    I love you more than all thats on the planet
    Movin talkin walkin breathing
    You know its true
    Oh baby its so funny
    You almost dont believe it
    As every voice is hanging from the silence
    Lamps are hanging from the ceiling
    Like a lady to her good manners
    Im tied up to this feeling

    Underneath your clothes
    Theres an endless story
    Theres the man I chose
    Theres my territory
    And all the things I deserve
    For being such a good girl honey
  • edith headedith head 5,106 Posts
    the lyrics to many of her songs are unintentionally funny

    Other than that, she is ungodly hot

    somebody please post some lyrics

    OK!

    Youre a song
    Written by the hands of god
    Dont get me wrong cause
    This might sound to you a bit odd
    But you own the place
    Where all my thoughts go hiding
    And right under your clothes
    Is where I'll find them

    Underneath your clothes
    Theres an endless story
    Theres the man I chose
    Theres my territory
    And all the things I deserve
    For being such a good girl honey

    Because of you
    I forgot the smart ways to lie
    Because of you
    Im running out of reasons to cry
    When the friends are gone
    When the partys over
    We will still belong to each other

    Underneath your clothes
    Theres an endless story
    Theres the man I chose
    Theres my territory
    And all the things I deserve
    For being such a good girl honey

    Underneath your clothes
    Theres an endless story
    Theres the man I chose
    Theres my territory
    And all the things I deserve
    For being such a good girl
    For being such a yeah...

    I love you more than all thats on the planet
    Movin talkin walkin breathing
    You know its true
    Oh baby its so funny
    You almost dont believe it
    As every voice is hanging from the silence
    Lamps are hanging from the ceiling
    Like a lady to her good manners
    Im tied up to this feeling

    Underneath your clothes
    Theres an endless story
    Theres the man I chose
    Theres my territory
    And all the things I deserve
    For being such a good girl honey

    that is the hardest i have laughed all week. thank you this is amazing amazing stuff
  • batmonbatmon 27,574 Posts
    I am surprised no one has dropped some images into this thread...

  • G_BalliandoG_Balliando 3,916 Posts
    nice, a pic from her good side... can we turn this into a top 5 pics of shakira's ass thread? yes/no?
  • DocMcCoyDocMcCoy "Go and laugh in your own country!" 5,917 Posts
    She used to sing in Spanish. She's still learning English. She's quite hott.

    I like the fact that she learned English, not so she'd be able to sing in it, but that she'd be able to write in it. Picture any of her contemporaries stretching themselves like that.

    All the warbling and yodelling gets a bit much sometimes, but otherwise, I think Shakira's cool.
  • deejdeej 5,125 Posts
    http://skorda.host.sk/shakira/shakira%20(21).jpg
  • crossingscrossings 946 Posts
    jorgelopezruiz is absolutely right... i was living in south america (ecuador) when she was HUGE in the mid-90's... which was right around when that EXTREMELY ANNOYING cranberries vocal style was blowing up... when all female singers were either trying to sound like that or some form of wannabe bjork. shakira changed her style to sound like that that cranberries girl and just never looked back. also, she was straight-up pudgy and had an ass so fat that it barely fit in her leather pants (not in a good way). she was never blonde until her first song in english (she 's actually brunette) and in latin america we were already beyond fed-up with her before people in the states even knew who she was. in general, latin american pop is really REALLY bad and always has been with the exception of a couple of argentinian bands (such as anything with gustavo cerati). and i honestly don't see why people think she's so hot... i see hotter girls jogging in my neighborhood on a daily basis... it should not excuse her lack of talent. just my 2 cents.
  • batmonbatmon 27,574 Posts
    jorgelopezruiz is absolutely right... i was living in south america (ecuador) when she was HUGE in the mid-90's... which was right around when that EXTREMELY ANNOYING cranberries vocal style was blowing up... when all female singers were either trying to sound like that or some form of wannabe bjork. shakira changed her style to sound like that that cranberries girl and just never looked back. also, she was straight-up pudgy and had an ass so fat that it barely fit in her leather pants (not in a good way). she was never blonde until her first song in english (she 's actually brunette) and in latin america we were already beyond fed-up with her before people in the states even knew who she was. in general, latin american pop is really REALLY bad and always has been with the exception of a couple of argentinian bands (such as anything with gustavo cerati). and i honestly don't see why people think she's so hot... i see hotter girls jogging in my neighborhood on a daily basis... it should not excuse her lack of talent. just my 2 cents.

    She not that hot, but place her against the American POP landscape and she jumps out at ya. Kelly Clarkson.........game over. JLo has the "urban" thang. They both cant sing but they fufill a role for a certain demograph.
  • G_BalliandoG_Balliando 3,916 Posts


    She not that hot, but place her against the American POP landscape and her ass[/b] jumps out at ya.
  • batmonbatmon 27,574 Posts
    She not that hot, but place her against the American POP landscape and her ass[/b] jumps out at ya.

    U cant keep your beer on it.
  • Young_PhonicsYoung_Phonics 8,039 Posts
    there's a rick ross and lil' flip remix out there.
  • Phill_MostPhill_Most 4,594 Posts
    Lamps are hanging from the ceiling
  • Birdman9Birdman9 5,417 Posts


    She not that hot, but place her against the American POP landscape and her ass[/b] jumps out at ya.



  • batmonbatmon 27,574 Posts
    She not that hot, but place her against the American POP landscape and her ass[/b] jumps out at ya.






    I dont think your ready.
  • G_BalliandoG_Balliando 3,916 Posts
    She not that hot, but place her against the American POP landscape and her ass[/b] jumps out at ya.






    I dont think your ready.

    yeah i'm not trying to say shakira stands a chance against beyonce. she doens't really even stand up against j-lo, really.
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