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a conversation can’t be good when it starts with..

spaceghostspaceghost 605 Posts
edited February 2016 in Off Topic (NRR)
"can you come into my office and shut the door please.""please step out of the car and put your hands on your head..""i think in your heart you knew this was coming...""i'm not trying to point fingers here, but...""you know how you said that we should be completely honest with each other? well...""don't take this personally...."
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  • SoulOnIceSoulOnIce 13,027 Posts
    "promise you won't get mad..."
  • knewjakknewjak 1,231 Posts
    "look, I just came back from the clinic and..."







  • BaptBapt 2,503 Posts


    A conversation can't be good when it starts with:[/b]

    "can you come into my office and shut the door please."

    "please step out of the car and put your hands on your head.."

    "i think in your heart you knew this was coming..."

    "i'm not trying to point fingers here, but..."

    "you know how you said that we should be completely honest with each other? well..."

    "don't take this personally...."

    and, when it ends with :

    You know, that's life... [/b]
  • spaceghostspaceghost 605 Posts
    "you know how you said what a piece of shit your car was..."

    "can we talk?"

    from a doctor..."so, first the good news..at least we caught
    it early..."

    over company loudspeaker "[insert name of employee here], please call human resources"
  • Lynn_NessLynn_Ness 233 Posts
    "Remember when I told you that (insert name here) and I were just friends?"

    Or, if it ends with;

    "Did you actually think that I wouldn't find out?!?!"
  • SwayzeSwayze 14,705 Posts
    "we NEED to talk..."
  • DJ_EnkiDJ_Enki 6,473 Posts
    "can we talk?"


    Or its needier cousin, "We need to talk." Nobody has ever needed to talk about anything because talking never helps anything.
  • mandrewmandrew 2,720 Posts
    is that your penis?

    can you stop staring at me?

    hi, aren't you on soulstrut?
  • bonzaisk8bonzaisk8 946 Posts
    hi, aren't you on soulstrut?
    hi, aren't you on soulstrut?
    hi, aren't you on soulstrut?
    hi, aren't you on soulstrut?
    hi, aren't you on soulstrut?
    hi, aren't you on soulstrut?
    hi, aren't you on soulstrut?
  • jleejlee 1,539 Posts
    because talking never helps anything.

  • DJBombjackDJBombjack Miami 1,665 Posts
    "Now this may hurt a little..."
  • theory9theory9 1,128 Posts
    "Promise you won't get mad..."
  • kennykenny 1,024 Posts
    "Oy! listen c&*t ! "



  • rootlesscosmorootlesscosmo 12,848 Posts
    "look, I'm not racist or anything, but..."
  • BreakSelfBreakSelf 2,925 Posts
    "Is that guy holding a gun?



    "That bird looks really sick"



    "Don't move, they can smell fear"



    "Actually the original has matrix numbers..."







  • luckluck 4,077 Posts
    "I think that Otis Redding is crap."



    (still shaking my head on that one)
  • cHillercHiller 293 Posts
    "Hey you in the bush..."
  • pokesterpokester 15 Posts
    before we go any further... there's something you should know
  • DirtyBeatGuyDirtyBeatGuy 297 Posts
    You should probably sit down...
    I don't know how to tell you this but...
    Do you remember anything you said last night when you were wasted?...
  • ReynaldoReynaldo 6,054 Posts
    "Just to be the honest person that I am ... "



    "While we are being honest, I should say ... "
  • Tuff_GongTuff_Gong 627 Posts
    "we'll probably laugh about this someday..."

    "my car ran out of gas and I'm just trying to get back home to *whatever town* so if you have any change you can spare..." (got this goddamn one last night, like change will help you get anywhere with the price of gas these days)

    "I'm up $2500, next thing you know I'm blowing a guy for a ham sandwich..."
  • Mr_Lee_PHDMr_Lee_PHD 2,042 Posts
    So I was talking to your Mom last night after she went down on me, and...........

  • ReynaldoReynaldo 6,054 Posts
    "You know how I told you that I was 20 ... "
  • cHillercHiller 293 Posts
    I swear, i didn't know your daughter was only 15...
  • PrimeCutsLtdPrimeCutsLtd jersey fresh 2,632 Posts
    Is it in?
  • johmbolayajohmbolaya 4,472 Posts
    "Actually the original has matrix numbers..."

    For the regular person, that conversation will go nowhere. But that can lead to a good conversation about history, politics, food, and sex.
  • The Raise UpThe Raise Up Golden Years... wah wah wah 452 Posts
    "I've given this a lot of thought, but I really think it's best..."
  • Mr_Lee_PHDMr_Lee_PHD 2,042 Posts
    Hey, you know Kanye West right .......
  • On_the_Red_ClayOn_the_Red_Clay 1,728 Posts
    "a certain British producer has a lot of pull, so...."
  • funky16cornersfunky16corners 7,175 Posts
    "I'd like you to meet my friend Dr. Phil..."
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