To all constipated monkeys: get off the crack???I mean the meat. Vegetarians stay regular. I ain't had no beef (haha) with my digestion since I was a kid eating all that mess
and excercise... take any of the above and go for a nice stroll for 15 to 20 minutes... youll be ready to let go after that...
i agree with the dude that mentioned to set aside a time to use the restroom... i actually agree with dudes whole post...
if none of the above works... try Psyllium. its a power (kinda) and you drop it in liquid (OJ is great!) and drink it down... the next day (keep it open... trust me) and youll be shitting that bbq you ate last summer... i lost 3lbs from that shit i took... ahhhh...
ahem...
and thanks shigger for the nasty story about cleaning up the floor... ill now go throw up
Has anyone actually tried this stuff? It sounds dreamy, but the humor on the site makes me question how serious the product actually is.
Damn, I wanna get the ish outta my bowels... Nasty.
I don't think it's a real site. I just remember the old school Saturday Night Live faux commercial where the product was called colon blow, and it was a spoof of the Total commercials - "how many bowls of Cheerios would you need to eat to equal the fiber of 1 bowl of Colon Blow? About 500,000!!"
and as concerned as everyone is, no one gave a damn that I was gassy yesterday. That sh*t stank yo!
lol, fuck the natural remedies...get this stuff, this is what they gave me when I had abdominal surgery and couldn't risk being constipated as it would rip my stitches if I strained.
I've been ill for a while and taking codeine pretty regularly over the past 10 months or so. Codeine can block you up pretty bad but the best remedy for me has been a high fibre diet and this sugary/syrupy stuff called Lactulose.
bravearcher's post was from yesterday. How are you homie?
Don't try the Sauerkraut juice unless you have a really high pain tolerance. If you are not used to it, it might be worse then suffering from that concrete block you have (had...)
The coffee (plus cocoa ?) suggestion I think is a solution that works if you've conditioned yourself to it. It's not a immediate remedy.
Most important: avoid getting into the situation again in the future. Think about what you did to your body to get there in the last few days.
By the way: Even if you got something out: Old rule of thumb: It takes as long to clean your trackt as it did to pile it up...
PS: I am not going to post any pictures (might offend) but maybe some visual stimulation works.
Comments
After that you'll be able to shit through the eye of a needle.
To all constipated monkeys: get off the crack???I mean the meat. Vegetarians stay regular. I ain't had no beef (haha) with my digestion since I was a kid eating all that mess
coffee
or
prunes
or
water
and excercise... take any of the above and go for a nice stroll for 15 to 20 minutes... youll be ready to let go after that...
i agree with the dude that mentioned to set aside a time to use the restroom... i actually agree with dudes whole post...
if none of the above works... try Psyllium. its a power (kinda) and you drop it in liquid (OJ is great!) and drink it down... the next day (keep it open... trust me) and youll be shitting that bbq you ate last summer... i lost 3lbs from that shit i took... ahhhh...
ahem...
and thanks shigger for the nasty story about cleaning up the floor... ill now go throw up
I don't think it's a real site. I just remember the old school Saturday Night Live faux commercial where the product was called colon blow, and it was a spoof of the Total commercials - "how many bowls of Cheerios would you need to eat to equal the fiber of 1 bowl of Colon Blow? About 500,000!!"
and as concerned as everyone is, no one gave a damn that I was gassy yesterday. That sh*t stank yo!
http://www.colace-pc.com/
works like a charm.
Don't try the Sauerkraut juice unless you have a really high pain tolerance. If you are not used to it, it might be worse then suffering from that concrete block you have (had...)
The coffee (plus cocoa ?) suggestion I think is a solution that works if you've conditioned yourself to it. It's not a immediate remedy.
Most important: avoid getting into the situation again in the future. Think about what you did to your body to get there in the last few days.
By the way: Even if you got something out: Old rule of thumb: It takes as long to clean your trackt as it did to pile it up...
PS: I am not going to post any pictures (might offend) but maybe some visual stimulation works.
Eat part of a cigarette (not the filter), some dip, or chewing tobacco. It doesn't take much.
It will take you 5-10 mins and your ass will explode. Seriously.
Your body recognizes tobacco as a poison and will attempt to flush your system to get rid of it.
Make sure you can spread your legs enough because you'll be puking through your legs while you're shitting.
Harsh, yes, but if you want to shit, this will do it.
It also helps to cure a case of worms.
Ummmmm internet why http://216.218.248.205/datastore/31/97/b/3197db21d4942a8d30c34768ea0d250a.jpg
no seriously why
http://216.218.248.205/datastore/28/71/b/287100609baa94dcc3e196bd15b3a16d.jpg