DJing tales (#8947 in a series)

The_Hook_UpThe_Hook_Up 8,182 Posts
edited January 2007 in Strut Central
Shingaling and myself were hired to play a party for the employees of a certain restaurant. Someone had hired a house DJ earlier for the party and the restaurant manager was all "oh hell no", so she called and hired us. We knew going into it that we might not be the most popular fellas at the party, but the money was good and it was only for three hours. All in all it went over well(the restaurant owner thought we were mindblowing, loved us) Although there were requests for Bon Jovi and Rick Springfield, no one got peeved we didnt bring that kinda shit with us.But the comedy was towards the end of the night, this one dude, who I believe was the bar back at the restaurant approached the restaurant manager, it went down something like thisBB: uuhhh, did you hire these guys?Manager: yes.BB: did you know what kind of music they were going to play?Manager: yesBB: did you know they only have records?Manager: I know its cool, isnt it?BB: not really, these guys dont even have CDs how can they be real DJs?Manager: (laughs)BB: here (hands manager his "card"), next time, if you want a real party, give me a call...I have CDsI guess we need to get some CDs to be real DJs...I guess he is just asshurt we made more in three hours than he makes all week.

  Comments


  • nzshadownzshadow 5,518 Posts
    dude, you are a fuckin poser.

    call yourself a dj...

    all you got is records...


  • spelunkspelunk 3,400 Posts
    real djs use laserdiscs. duh.

  • bozakbozak 334 Posts
    haha what a douche.

    I was doing a similar party for the employees that work at an upscale joint around my way and everyone was feelin it hard. Everyone was faded. It was a lot of fun. EXCEPT for this dude who was mega-asshurt. His arms were folded the whole time and he had that pissed off foot tapping thing going. Turns out he was infuriated that I wasnt playing the Pouges. haha. I was getting requests for players ball, 25 lighters on my dresser, ride around shinin'....real smooth player shit. Anyways, dude storms out saying last year was better. I asked around and last years party consisted of a hotel room and a boombox. haha. theres always going to be at least one douche.....

  • real djs use laserdiscs. duh.

    nah. they use 16mm silent films with added soundtrack.

  • DORDOR Two Ron Toe 9,900 Posts
    To be a real DJ nowadayz, you must get urself one of these:



    And then...


    NO and then!

  • pjl2000xlpjl2000xl 1,795 Posts
    To be a real DJ nowadayz, you must get urself one of these:



    And then...


    NO and then!
    woah. thats kinda dope.

    i had my first real heckler though right before Christmas. This older guy was sitting there at the bar all dressed in a red suit jacket. He came up to me early in the night, gave me the screwface and said "Dont you know this is Christmas?". I was like "yeah i know" and shrugged him off. 20 minutes later homeboy starts booing me from the bar and giving me the thumbs down. Mind you im playing real good funk and everyone else is dancing. Then he comes up again, this time angry probably due to the drinks he was having on the rocks and all got in my face on some "THIS iS FUCKING CHRISTMAS!". Then he went back to the bar again this time livid with me, booing and screaming about how bad I am. I say fuck this and start playing some real offensive hip hop. This was dudes breaking point. He comes up and screams at me, "WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?!?! YOUR MUSIC IS FUCKING HORRIBLE!! DONT YOU KNOW ITS CHRISTMAS????" I proceed to turn up the monitor volume and just smile at him going "WHAT? WHAT? I CANT HEAR YOU!" He gets all flustered, turns bright red, and starts screaming "OF COURSE YOU CANT HEAR ME YOU COCKSUCKER! THIS MUSIC YOUR PLAYING IS HORRIBLE! YOU FUCKING COCKSUCKER! THIS IS MOTHERFUCKING CHRISTMAS GOD DAMNIT AND YOUR RUINING MY FUCKING CHRISTMAS MOTHERFUCKER" After this i get pissed off and go "I DONT GIVE A FUCK WHAT DAY IT IS, I PLAY WHAT I PLAY! IF YOU FEEL LIKE PAYING ME MORE MONEY THEN THE OWNER, ILL PLAY MOTHERFUCKING NAT KING COLE ALL FUCKING NIGHT!" He mumbled some shit, gave me the meanest old man middle finger, then just stormed out.

    Ive had people be discontent with my performance, but have never seen a spectacle like this. I could just imagine that being someones grandpa. I dont know what would motivate someone though to be that much of a cocksucker to the entertainment. Most sane, logical people will just bounce or come request some bullshit. Not boo you from the bar and try to pick a fight with you while your mixing a song.

  • Shingaling and myself were hired to play a party for the employees of a certain restaurant. Someone had hired a house DJ earlier for the party and the restaurant manager was all "oh hell no", so she called and hired us. We knew going into it that we might not be the most popular fellas at the party, but the money was good and it was only for three hours. All in all it went over well(the restaurant owner thought we were mindblowing, loved us) Although there were requests for Bon Jovi and Rick Springfield, no one got peeved we didnt bring that kinda shit with us.
    But the comedy was towards the end of the night, this one dude, who I believe was the bar back at the restaurant approached the restaurant manager, it went down something like this

    BB: uuhhh, did you hire these guys?
    Manager: yes.
    BB: did you know what kind of music they were going to play?
    Manager: yes
    BB: did you know they only have records?
    Manager: I know its cool, isnt it?
    BB: not really, these guys dont even have CDs how can they be real DJs?
    Manager: (laughs)
    BB: here (hands manager his "card"), next time, if you want a real party, give me a call...I have CDs

    I guess we need to get some CDs to be real DJs...

    I guess he is just asshurt we made more in three hours than he makes all week.

    I did a similar gig last sunday- restaurant staff party, everyone enjoying themselves, dancing is going on, and this one girl was just FEELIN' it...danced her ass off, moving all sexy like. When I did a latin set, she and a waiter started tangoing to Willie Colon- her top is off the shoulder down to her elbow, these two are MOVIN', and ended up getting a 'round of applause.

    WELL, apparently her little runt of a boyfriend who is dating way out of his league, and will probably be gone in 3 weeks, felt a little upstaged, so he came up to me and made his request. 'Do you have any Stevie Ray Vaugh?' 'Nah, man, sorry...' 'Well, that sucks.' And, he grabbed his guitar and waited at the bar for the girl to finish and leave.

  • DJBombjackDJBombjack Miami 1,665 Posts
    ^^^ But it happens... just last week I had some guy get REAL pissed because I wouldn't play Promiscuous Girl for his girls birthday (bear in mind the night is a straight-up ROCK night). Dude actually wanted to fight me... tried to get up in my face. I just looked at him and told him he was a retard and to go fuck himself. At which point the bouncer intervened and clamed him down. But damn... what is WITH some people?

  • CosmoCosmo 9,768 Posts
    But damn... what is WITH some people?

    It's a general sense of entitlement that motherfuckers have when they go out, Jesse. People are shitheads because they expect everything to be about THEM, and they're used to instant gratification.

  • the bottom line is that it is never a good look to put down the dj, unless you came to see that specific dj and he didnt play what he advertised. at the same time, u gotta remember that u are there to entertain, so its equally NAGL when someone makes a request and the dj shoots back an ice-grill. relax superstar...

  • cpeetzcpeetz 2,112 Posts
    the bottom line is that it is never a good look to put down the dj, unless you came to see that specific dj and he didnt play what he advertised. at the same time, u gotta remember that u are there to entertain, so its equally NAGL when someone makes a request and the dj shoots back an ice-grill. relax superstar...

    Van horn the defender of shitty girlfriends and request retards everywhere!

  • eliseelise 3,252 Posts
    the bottom line is that it is never a good look to put down the dj, unless you came to see that specific dj and he didnt play what he advertised. at the same time, u gotta remember that u are there to entertain, so its equally NAGL when someone makes a request and the dj shoots back an ice-grill. relax superstar...

    Van horn the defender of shitty girlfriends and request retards everywhere!

  • the bottom line is that it is never a good look to put down the dj, unless you came to see that specific dj and he didnt play what he advertised. at the same time, u gotta remember that u are there to entertain, so its equally NAGL when someone makes a request and the dj shoots back an ice-grill. relax superstar...

    Van horn the defender of shitty girlfriends and request retards everywhere!

    haha, not exactly. i'm just saying it comes with the territory (bad requests that is). i'm sure the dude at the piano bar gets sick of people asking for "piano man"...

  • the bottom line is that it is never a good look to put down the dj, unless you came to see that specific dj and he didnt play what he advertised. at the same time, u gotta remember that u are there to entertain, so its equally NAGL when someone makes a request and the dj shoots back an ice-grill. relax superstar...

    Van horn the defender of shitty girlfriends and request retards everywhere!

    strangest first post ever

  • the bottom line is that it is never a good look to put down the dj, unless you came to see that specific dj and he didnt play what he advertised. at the same time, u gotta remember that u are there to entertain, so its equally NAGL when someone makes a request and the dj shoots back an ice-grill. relax superstar...

    Van horn the defender of shitty girlfriends and request retards everywhere!

    haha, not exactly. i'm just saying it comes with the territory (bad requests that is). i'm sure the dude at the piano bar gets sick of people asking for "piano man"...

    He then goes on IvoryTickler.com and posts, 'Piano Man request #8947.'

  • cpeetzcpeetz 2,112 Posts

    haha, not exactly. i'm just saying it comes with the territory (bad requests that is). i'm sure the dude at the piano bar gets sick of people asking for "piano man"...

    True enough, I always tried to be cool about peoples lame requests,

    "Sorry I don't have any Beatles, I have mostly hip hop with me tonight" etc. etc.

  • CosmoCosmo 9,768 Posts
    the bottom line is that it is never a good look to put down the dj, unless you came to see that specific dj and he didnt play what he advertised. at the same time, u gotta remember that u are there to entertain, so its equally NAGL when someone makes a request and the dj shoots back an ice-grill. relax superstar...

    Van horn the defender of shitty girlfriends and request retards everywhere!

    strangest first post ever

    Hahah, yeah...

  • BurnsBurns 2,227 Posts
    real djs don't use Microwave. duh.


  • FatbackFatback 6,746 Posts
    clamed him down.


  • To be a real DJ nowadayz, you must get urself one of these:



    And then...


    NO and then!
    woah. thats kinda dope.


    i had my first real heckler though right before Christmas. This older guy was sitting there at the bar all dressed in a red suit jacket. He came up to me early in the night, gave me the screwface and said "Dont you know this is Christmas?". I was like "yeah i know" and shrugged him off. 20 minutes later homeboy starts booing me from the bar and giving me the thumbs down. Mind you im playing real good funk and everyone else is dancing. Then he comes up again, this time angry probably due to the drinks he was having on the rocks and all got in my face on some "THIS iS FUCKING CHRISTMAS!". Then he went back to the bar again this time livid with me, booing and screaming about how bad I am. I say fuck this and start playing some real offensive hip hop. This was dudes breaking point. He comes up and screams at me, "WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?!?! YOUR MUSIC IS FUCKING HORRIBLE!! DONT YOU KNOW ITS CHRISTMAS????" I proceed to turn up the monitor volume and just smile at him going "WHAT? WHAT? I CANT HEAR YOU!" He gets all flustered, turns bright red, and starts screaming "OF COURSE YOU CANT HEAR ME YOU COCKSUCKER! THIS MUSIC YOUR PLAYING IS HORRIBLE! YOU FUCKING COCKSUCKER! THIS IS MOTHERFUCKING CHRISTMAS GOD DAMNIT AND YOUR RUINING MY FUCKING CHRISTMAS MOTHERFUCKER" After this i get pissed off and go "I DONT GIVE A FUCK WHAT DAY IT IS, I PLAY WHAT I PLAY! IF YOU FEEL LIKE PAYING ME MORE MONEY THEN THE OWNER, ILL PLAY MOTHERFUCKING NAT KING COLE ALL FUCKING NIGHT!" He mumbled some shit, gave me the meanest old man middle finger, then just stormed out.

    Ive had people be discontent with my performance, but have never seen a spectacle like this. I could just imagine that being someones grandpa. I dont know what would motivate someone though to be that much of a cocksucker to the entertainment. Most sane, logical people will just bounce or come request some bullshit. Not boo you from the bar and try to pick a fight with you while your mixing a song.


    I'm a pretty chill dude but yo, you should of punched that fucker. If they're asking for it, no one is above an ass-beating.

  • pjl2000xlpjl2000xl 1,795 Posts
    Nah man, im not into hitting the customers. I mean look - ive had real shitty jobs before, pizza delivery guy in the hood, tons of customer service jobs, restaurants, valet, seedy motel desk worker, all kinds of shit, in pretty shitty areas. Ive seen some of the craziest people doing some of the craziest shit with me usually as the recipient, while i was at work. But thats my job. You got to suck it up and act professional while your on the clock. At least I have to now cause im fucking broke and need as much work as I can get.

    Ill tell you though if i owned a venue and the entertainment starting hitting the patrons, that motherfucker would be out on the street with his "records" (i.e. Microwave) with the quickness. We all got to deal with assholes at work, not even us superstar djs are exempt. Customers are paying the bills so fighting them would only be an absolute option.


    But shit if you can get away with punching those dudes with no consequence towards your financial gains or employment status, then so be it. Everyone needs a good asswhooping once and a while, and the dudes that heckle me at gigs are prime candidates. Thats just not my work ethic. That should be the bouncers ethic.

  • I'm a pretty chill dude but yo, you should of punched that fucker. If they're asking for it, no one is above an ass-beating.


    This dude could kill you, Tough Guy:












    Now are you gonna play "It's Your Birthday" or not?

  • cpeetzcpeetz 2,112 Posts
    Ill tell you though if i owned a venue and the entertainment starting hitting the patrons, that motherfucker would be out on the street with his "records" (i.e. Microwave) with the quickness. We all got to deal with assholes at work, not even us superstar djs are exempt. Customers are paying the bills so fighting them would only be an absolute option.

    As soon as someone abuses your staff like that, they get their patron pass revoked...
    The customer is always right until he's wrong, then it's on!

  • I got an epi-pen ,son. you can't stop me.

  • Mr_Lee_PHDMr_Lee_PHD 2,042 Posts
    You should've cut the sound out dead in the middle of some fresh-ass hip hop jam, got on the mic and said...

    Okay everybody, special request from my man over there.... Yo yo yo eveybody give it up for the man over there.. (crazy applause from the crowd).. This dude LOVES christmas, so we're going to do a little something speacial for him... put a little smile on his face... Everybody give the man a round of applause, he's going to get his groove on. Yo gramps, this one is for you and your christmassy ass!!!

    Then you should have dropped Frosty The Snowman for his Chrismassy ass !!!

  • eliseelise 3,252 Posts
    You should've cut the sound out dead in the middle of some fresh-ass hip hop jam, got on the mic and said...

    Okay everybody, special request from my man over there.... Yo yo yo eveybody give it up for the man over there.. (crazy applause from the crowd).. This dude LOVES christmas, so we're going to do a little something speacial for him... put a little smile on his face... Everybody give the man a round of applause, he's going to get his groove on. Yo gramps, this one is for you and your christmassy ass!!!

    Then you should have dropped Frosty The Snowman for his Chrismassy ass !!!

  • djkingottodjkingotto 1,704 Posts
    we were playing downtown once and my man uses a CDj to play a lot of the latin shit he has. some drunk, stupid meathead sat his beer down on top of the spinning cdj platter as its playing! realizing what he did and somehow not spilling his beer, he played it cool by holding the platter and scratching the song back into playing! then he got screamed on and realized how lucky he was that he was able to stumble out of the club on his own that night.
Sign In or Register to comment.