My best dj request so far

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  • DongerDonger 854 Posts
    I've heard of a dj that asks for peoples business card and anyone stupid enough to give him it, he rings up on monday morning and starts asking ridiculous questions, one guy was a manager for an electrical store and he started saying "oh come on you must have some fresh fish, everyone would love it, look no one's buying those tvs, you must have some cod or what about even some fish fingers".

    That's extreme. But I actually have asked people where they work, then asked them how they would like it if I stood over them in their cubicle on Monday morning and told them how to do their job.

    I remember my DJ partner once telling off an opinionated bartender, and told her he doesn't tell her how to make her drinks so she should shut the f*ck up! Her drinks were shitty btw.

  • bassiebassie 11,710 Posts
    The best request I ever got is also the worst:

    "This is great stuff, can you make me a mix?"
    "Sure. Come back next week and I'll have it for you."
    "Can you do it at my house?"
    "You want me to come to your house and make you a mix tape?"
    "Ya."
    "No."

  • pointmanpointman 1,042 Posts
    I've had a bouncer toss someone for me before.
    I was digging for another record and some nice looking girl walks up across the other side of the table from me and kindly says hello. I say hello and then just got back to looking for my next 45. A moment later, while cueing it up I feel someone grab me from behind and then proceeds to attempt a bear hug while humping me at the same time. I turn around and of course it's this girl, I suppose that's a nice problem to have except she was wasted and literally impeded me from doing anything. I yelled help and a bouncer showed up and carted her off.


    There was the time when someone walked up to me mid-set, said "I really like the stuff you're playing man." The he dropped a bag of yayo on the unoccupied turntable and walked off. I suppose if I was into coke that would of been great.


    One of my favorite requests: One time I was playing in this fancy club in Austin, when some guy walks up and says "This is for you" handing me a $100 bill.Things then proceed like this.
    "Do you have random record #1"
    "Nah man"
    "How about random record #2"
    "Nope, all I have with me is soul 45s man."
    "Oh, okay" He then sullenly walks off like Charlie Brown.

  • sticky_dojahsticky_dojah New York City. 2,136 Posts
    I want to hear more bouncer/DJ collabo stories.

    Story #151:

    Last month I was djing in Warsaw with dj krime from cracow (polish itf champ, sick on the decks)...the night was dope, the crowd was dancing, everyone enjoying the party, really good vibe in there and you could play anything you wanted, no stupid requests, no nothing, highly educated crowd, one of my best crowds really. I did my set and people were screaming, bringing spliffs on stage to say thank you, well it was just a perfect night, until....well,a girl from the czech republic apparently entered the stage and started to talk to us (Can I leave my coat here? Oh, nice djing, blabla...). She was already a bit on something or drunk or whatever. She then left the stage and joined the dancing crowd again. I finished my set and got me a drink at the bar. When I came back, the girl was on stage again and was standing in front of the decks and said somehting like "Someone should clean up this whole mess here" and made a handmove like she wanted to wipe all of sayratoe and turntables and everything off the table. I politely escorted her off stage. Then I took another round throughout the club. When I came back, the dj from warsaw, who had took over, looked all puzzled at me showing me a broken needle and said that said girl came back again and started to scratch the record he was cueing, ending up in a broken needle. Luckily i had my needles with me so we could continue. Now I thought he told the bouncers and they threw her out. but he didn't care that much and said girl was again in the crowd.
    Now Krime took over and I did another round through the club. When I came back, he looked at me like wtf. He asked me if witnessed what just happened, and i said no, since there were many rooms in said club and i didn't watch the stage the whole time. Apparently, girl came bacck and did what she told me before. she started to wipe everything off the table, resulting in almost crashing krime's laptop and his microwave modem. It was a miracle that only the cables that were not in use disconnected. Krime told me, "man this was the first time I had to smack a girl, but I really had to, as she would not stop". He hit her and she fell off stage. I look at him in disbelief, as the music did not stop and i didn't hear anything. We were lucky. Next thing, B***ek, the dj from warsaw returns to the stage with a crate of his records. After said incident the girl quickly grabbed his crate and tried to escape with a half full crate of records through the main entrance!!! Luckily and finally, the bouncers threw her ass out and we could continue in peace, so they finally did something about it. Someone from staff still has her jacket:) That was some serious ish as I have never seen a girl so crazy...lesson: always have someone next to the decks (if they stand open to the crowd)

  • onetetonetet 1,754 Posts
    haven't read the entire thread so similar situations have doubtless been brought up, but... a drunken frat boy once requested The Humpty Dance while I was playing... The Humpty Dance.

    "Dude, can you play um... shit, you know... the fucking Humpty Dance?"
    "Not only will I play that song, I am currently playing that song."

    He looks at me angrily, then confusedly, and finally the slightest flash of comprehension dances across his face. He walks away with his beer, and sulks in a chair through the rest of the song.

  • kicks79kicks79 1,334 Posts
    You need bouncers to pull girls off you at gigs?
    alert!

  • sticky_dojahsticky_dojah New York City. 2,136 Posts
    You need bouncers to pull girls off you at gigs?
    alert!

    Nah man, you misread it. Krime threw her off stage, but punching a girl while djing is I only said that it is always better to have someone in range that prevents such things

  • SupergoodSupergood 1,213 Posts

    Almost as good as last week when this crazy Filipino girl started fondling me while I was playing, and then squatted down next to me while I was looking through my crate. She started playing with herself (she was wearing a really short skirt, and spread her legs wide open) and then asked me if I liked her. "Sure," I said. "I like you." Then the shocker: "Well then do you want to FUCK me?" Woah!


  • SnagglepusSnagglepus 1,756 Posts

    I'm going through a lot of nights at the moment where people are leaning over and "scratching" my records.

    I had that shit happen last week. First, the guy steps up asking to hear some scratching. I don't generally scratch. I say, "I suppose, if you really think it will make the song sound better." I proceed to do some half-hearted scratches over whatever funk cut I was playing. He seemed pleased for the moment. (I can't believe that scratching is still a novelty to some.) Then he comes back and actually puts his hand on one of my records attempting to do a little scratching of his own. I had to pick his hand up and, well, hand it back to him. "Uhhhh ... no." He didn't get aggressive or anything, but seemed honestly surprised that what he'd done wasn't completely ok.

  • LuminLumin 807 Posts
    a couple weeks ago i was playin at this monthly joint i do in downtown miami. pretty upscale crowd, vibe of this spot is really really nice... dope females all over the place. i get there around midnight and my dawg that i dj with says he needs a break. i hadnt even put my records down when he said this.
    anyways, i get on not really havin a chance to feel the crowd out. there were 2 birthday parties being held at the same time that night. recipe for disaster, right? started playin some old school hip hop and everyone is diggin it, dancin and what not. about 3 songs in, the dj booth visits begin... and to my surprise noone is askin for hip hop. everyone kept sayin they were lovin what i was doin and to keep on. i thought i was dreamin. after about 45 minutes, these 2 fly french girls came up and stood in front of me just staring. i asked them what was up, and what they said blew my mind.
    "Can you play some disco?"
    the spot got turned out. most fun i had in a long time.
    my boy never came back to give me a break so i kept playin til 5 am.


    same night some gay cat came up to me all sweaty. proceeded to say "im so hot right now. i need to hear some raunchy female rap."
    "is lil kim raunchy enough?"
    "perfect"
    this is where being too nice can lead down the wrong path.
    dude went away, got super wasted and came back about 30 minutes later and started hittin on me. i guess he took my playing his request as a sign that im interested.

    same thing happened the following weekend. some gay dude jumped in my car drunker than 13 hillbillies and begged me to take him home with me.

  • keithvanhornkeithvanhorn 3,855 Posts
    I want to hear more bouncer/DJ collabo stories.

    Or lack thereof. IN other words:

    who's been helped by bouncers in dealing with knuckleheads?
    who's been burned by bouncers?

    Bouncers are always protective to an extreme level..especially if you have been at a club/bar for a while. I guess that is good, but generally, i hesitate to signal a bouncer because it always means that person is getting thrown out, which isn't always warranted and makes me look like a dictator/a**hole. It also exposes the club to potential liability for whatever happens.

    The place i work at now is sorta beougie/upscale so its rare that i'd even think about getting a bouncer involved, but when i was in college, djing at college bars, there were some crazy incidents. One night a dude who had broken my mixer by spilling a beer on it a few weeks prior came back with a few of his buddies to try to get his money back (i had gone to his dorm room and given him the broken mixer and asked for the cash equivalent, which he paid me). Mid-set, his buddies are threatening me, so I tried to call a friend over, but the owner and bouncer (mob wanna-a-be's) got wind of what was going on and turned things into a sopranos episode.

    One of the kids got the brunt of it, as the owner smashed the dudes face against the bar. All of them were literally kicked down the stairs and thrown out on the street. The worst part (for them) is that when the police came, they were the only people who got arrested.

    I felt bad for all those dudes and while i'm cool with all the bouncers i work with now (and wouldnt expect any of them to act like this), there are PLENTY of meatheads who live to flex their muscles on people. Its kinda scary hearing a bouncer talk about how he'd love to taser someone.

  • kicks79kicks79 1,334 Posts
    You need bouncers to pull girls off you at gigs?
    alert!

    Nah man, you misread it. Krime threw her off stage, but punching a girl while djing is I only said that it is always better to have someone in range that prevents such things

    Umm nah i was talkin about pointmans post. But anyway. Crazy story indeed.

  • DJ_PhillieDJ_Phillie 199 Posts
    a couple weeks ago i was playin at this monthly joint i do in downtown miami. pretty upscale crowd, vibe of this spot is really really nice... dope females all over the place. i get there around midnight and my dawg that i dj with says he needs a break. i hadnt even put my records down when he said this.
    anyways, i get on not really havin a chance to feel the crowd out. there were 2 birthday parties being held at the same time that night. recipe for disaster, right? started playin some old school hip hop and everyone is diggin it, dancin and what not. about 3 songs in, the dj booth visits begin... and to my surprise noone is askin for hip hop. everyone kept sayin they were lovin what i was doin and to keep on. i thought i was dreamin. after about 45 minutes, these 2 fly french girls came up and stood in front of me just staring. i asked them what was up, and what they said blew my mind.
    "Can you play some disco?"
    the spot got turned out. most fun i had in a long time.
    my boy never came back to give me a break so i kept playin til 5 am.


    same night some gay cat came up to me all sweaty. proceeded to say "im so hot right now. i need to hear some raunchy female rap."
    "is lil kim raunchy enough?"
    "perfect"
    this is where being too nice can lead down the wrong path.
    dude went away, got super wasted and came back about 30 minutes later and started hittin on me. i guess he took my playing his request as a sign that im interested.

    same thing happened the following weekend. some gay dude jumped in my car drunker than 13 hillbillies and begged me to take him home with me.


    sounds like u give off gay vibes...


    ( what happened to the GHEY graemlin??? )

  • pointmanpointman 1,042 Posts
    You need bouncers to pull girls off you at gigs?
    alert!

    Nah man, you misread it. Krime threw her off stage, but punching a girl while djing is I only said that it is always better to have someone in range that prevents such things

    Umm nah i was talkin about pointmans post. But anyway. Crazy story indeed.

    Yeah I got a tough life, lemme tell you.

  • I play every friday a seven hour set

    I know this isn't crazy unusual but goddamn...that sounds like a chore. How much new music do you bring every week vs. recycled tunes?


    I try and mix it up as much as possible. I have like division a b and c tunes, if I've played a track a few times it stays at home for a month or two, then I bring it back in. to be honest it's more fun than just doing an hour or two. the challenge to continually find tracks I've not played there keeps me digging. I have deep crates!

  • I was about 5 songs into my set at the bar the other night when this guy came up and said "What you going to play tonight?"

    "60s and 70s soul," I said, taking off the record that had just played.

    "So when do you start?"


    I took a girlfriend to hear my SO & friend dj detroit soul.

    After about an hour of listening to them spin, she was like "so when are they starting?" Even though we were sitting 2 feet away from the dj table where they were doing, ya know, dj stuff.

    I think people are expecting some smoke, lights, boxing match type mc'ing, and maybe some magic.

  • dayday 9,611 Posts
    I still need one of thos "No Requests" t-shirts!

    While I was DJing in Cologne some kid came up and asked me "can you play some RJD2?". I politely told him that probably wouldn't go over too well and started cueing up the next song. Then he comes back and asks if I can play some Madlib. I told him to look behind and see that the floor was packed and that was not gonna happen but dude asked at least 2 or 3 more times that night.

    Last gig was cool since no one asked me to play anything, but twice people came up to tell me I was doing a great job/"keep doing what you're doing" etc.

  • sticky_dojahsticky_dojah New York City. 2,136 Posts
    I still need one of thos "No Requests" t-shirts!

    While I was DJing in Cologne some kid came up and asked me "can you play some RJD2?".

    You should have dropped that "1976" and this emorapper would have been glad

    fo real, once again, you did a superbe job in the subway...goddamn, that dj day, ah yeah

  • empanadamnempanadamn 1,462 Posts
    I went to a free show in the park tonight featuring DC Go-Go legend Chuck Brown, with DJ $mall ??hange opening. I was talking with $?? and friends when this little girl who was probably about 7 or 8 years old walks up and asks, "So when's the real music coming on?" as dude is playing old funk & soul cuts. She clarifies, "You know, music with instruments." After she left, the other mid-30 year old music head dudes go off jokingly about teaching this young'n how to approach a DJ properly.

    I immediately thought of this thread.

    PS. I have no idea why they got CB to perform. It was mostly children and their parents in Stuyvesant Town (a residential area of the East Village in Manhattan). I guarantee 97% of those people have any idea who this dude is, much less the music genre.

  • bobbydeebobbydee 849 Posts
    I still need one of thos "No Requests" t-shirts!

    While I was DJing in Cologne some kid came up and asked me "can you play some RJD2?".

    You should have dropped that "1976" and this emorapper would have been glad

    Ha thats exactly what i was thinking.

  • I went to a free show in the park tonight featuring DC Go-Go legend Chuck Brown, with DJ $mall ??hange opening. I was talking with $?? and friends when this little girl who was probably about 7 or 8 years old walks up and asks, "So when's the real music coming on?" as dude is playing old funk & soul cuts. She clarifies, "You know, music with instruments." After she left, the other mid-30 year old music head dudes go off jokingly about teaching this young'n how to approach a DJ properly.

    I immediately thought of this thread.

    PS. I have no idea why they got CB to perform. It was mostly children and their parents in Stuyvesant Town (a residential area of the East Village in Manhattan). I guarantee 97% of those people have any idea who this dude is, much less the music genre.

    Crazy. Did he play "Theme to The Godfather?" That shit is ILL. His new album is really good (what I've heard of it at least).

  • bonzaisk8bonzaisk8 946 Posts
    lol.great stories so far. too many mentioned that have happened to me as well. whats worse is when you've gotten wack requests all night, and you've built kind of a tick from the requests and the next person who comes up to you, you're automatically rude with them because you think they're going to request something too. but it turns out they were just trying to compliment you. feel like a champ after that i'm sure.


  • gravelheadwrapgravelheadwrap corn 948 Posts
    I once had a request for 'cypress tree' and 'the farmer' by Snow...

    and working in a record store a woman wanted the latest CD by 'Enis' (Enya)


  • OptimusLimeOptimusLime 227 Posts
    Worst "request" I've ever had was 2 fat australian chicks standing about 20 cm from shouting at the top of their considerably sized lungs "MADOOOOONNNAAAAAAA" Over and over again.
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