co-workers you want to fart on (NRR)

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  • bluesnagbluesnag 1,285 Posts
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
    Fuck a fart. I would take a dump on her.

    Maybe drop an "upperdecker" in the CPU.

    the "upper decker" is my favorite! i actually lost a bet on super bowl '04 where the stakes were that the loser has to take an upper decker is somebody's toilet tank and take a picture. i gotta payup on that shit...

  • I had a bust of Sole that worked wonders

    POST A PHOTO OR YOURE SOFT NOT

    I left it in Berkeley. It just seemed like the right thing to do

  • HAZHAZ 3,376 Posts
    There's this co-worker of mine who is just up and down nasty. She's mad hairy, says sleazy things to me like "Wow, ______'s husband is a realllllll looker." and has some major gastrointestinal probs and ALWAYS floods the toilet. Then she acts all mad & bitches about the toilets being shoddy. I've feel sorry everytime because other people have to clean up her mess. She must knows this because everytime this happens, she walks into the bathroom with a goddamn newspaper and mug of coffee. NASTY!! Everytime I see her walk into the ladies room the same time as me, I just straight turn around because I don't want to hear her gastro probs

    so yeah, it's more like she farts on everyone in our office.

    In fairness to your co-worker, many new toilets don't flush well, especially in California because of the need for water conservation. Here's an extensive study on the subject & the results will shock & amaze.

    http://www.savingwater.org/inside_bathroom_toilettest.htm

    I got nothin' on the hariy thing, tho. Not feeling that at all.

    peace

    h

  • edith headedith head 5,106 Posts
    this isn't that kind of toilet though man. i know because our landlord just installed on of those water saving toilets.



    the ones at work are really fierce, i swear

  • HAZHAZ 3,376 Posts
    these aren't that kind of toilets though man. i know because our landlord just installed on of those water saving toilets.

    the ones at work are really fierce, i swear

    California has got some cool toilets - i like the ones with 2 flush settings - one for pee & the other for poop. Going to the bathroom is getting hi tech!

    Peace

    h

  • mandrewmandrew 2,720 Posts
    these aren't that kind of toilets though man. i know because our landlord just installed on of those water saving toilets.

    the ones at work are really fierce, i swear

    California has got some cool toilets - i like the ones with 2 flush settings - one for pee & the other for poop. Going to the bathroom is getting hi tech!

    Peace

    h

    i wanna know how come you know so much about dwarves toilets

  • HAZHAZ 3,376 Posts
    these aren't that kind of toilets though man. i know because our landlord just installed on of those water saving toilets.

    the ones at work are really fierce, i swear

    California has got some cool toilets - i like the ones with 2 flush settings - one for pee & the other for poop. Going to the bathroom is getting hi tech!

    Peace

    h

    i wanna know how come you know so much about dwarves toilets

    Had to do a lot of research on toilets for work. We wanted to "go green" & save water. I highly recommend the Toto drake. Those italians know how to make a good toilet.


  • i used to work for a telecommunications company that has toilets on the 2nd floor (my floor) that would overflow every fortnight or so, flooding half the floor .
    My desk was probably 20m from the toilets, and i would usually have headphones on to drown out the "corporte accounts Nina speaking... just a moment" drivel. So i wouldnt really notice the growing puddle/commotion until my feet/pants started to get wet.

    definition of

    There also used to be someone who pissed all over the cubicle. Im talking EVERYWHERE. We all used to speculate over who it was, the concensus was that it was a huge fat guy in another department, who was at least 200kg. Christmas party '02 i was kinda tanked and got talking to him (not many people did because he had poor personal hygiene) and i found out it WAS him. Aparently, he hadn't seen his wang in a decade, and so to find the toilet, he would just let a little out at a time and zero in on the sound of the water. It took ever once of my self control not to crack up! Guy was smiling like it was a brilliant plan!

  • See if she has a mouse with a ball in it. If so, take it out. That'll have her losing her mind in no time.

  • So, yeah, I farted that bitch right out the door. This morning I heard a lot of noise from her desk and when I walked by to drop a morning bomb on her I saw her packing up some boxes. Bitch got d.

  • JLRJLR 3,835 Posts
    I saw her packing up some boxes.

    That part is so sad. I hate to see people carrying those stupid boxes full of teddy bears and family pictures. It's so depressing. That's why I keep my desk as clean and non-personal as possible. The day the fire comes for me, I'll just walk away like David Banner in Hulk.

  • I saw her packing up some boxes.

    That part is so sad. I hate to see people carrying those stupid boxes full of teddy bears and family pictures. It's so depressing. That's why I keep my desk as clean and non-personal as possible. The day the fire comes for me, I'll just walk away like David Banner in Hulk.

    Yeah, whats even better is when the boss and HR rep are standing behind them to make sure they don't steal anything.
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