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Not Xmas Yet But Here's Some Alba

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  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    Not feelin the ratio of the girth of her neck to its lengthb, 21b, 21b/w never get photographed within 2 foot of a Campari and sodab, 21b, 21c/w there's not one of them lads wants to crawl up her torso, nowumsayin?
  • JimsterJimster Cruffiton.etsy.com 6,960 Posts
    So you wouldn't?
  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    Let's say I wouldn't kick her out of bedb, 21but I wouldn't have kicked her in there in the first placeb, 21b, 21Carol's my girl, and you know thatb, 21couldn't possibly contemplate anyone elseb, 21b, 21 img src="http://blogs.coventrytelegraph.net/passtheremote/countdowntwo.jpg"1 b, 21b, 21b/wb, 21b, 21 img src="http://photos5.flickr.com/5401600_c1684a6566.jpg"1 b, 21b, 21 img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/oof.gif" alt="" 21 img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/ooo.gif" alt="" 21 img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/ehh.gif" alt="" 21 img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/wtf.gif" alt="" 21
  • djkingottodjkingotto 1,704 Posts
    campari is liquid sterno.
  • DORDOR Two Ron Toe 9,905 Posts
    img src="http://i37.tinypic.com/166hcia.jpg"1
  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    Heh heh!
  • DB_CooperDB_Cooper Manhatin' 7,823 Posts
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    h, 21
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    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21Don't take this the wrong way guys, but there's something uniquely British about this woman.
  • PABLOPABLO 1,921 Posts
    Her teeth look fine to me.
  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
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    b, 21
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    h, 21
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    font class="post"1
    b, 21
    b, 21Don't take this the wrong way guys, but there's something uniquely British about this woman.
    b, 21
    b, 21
    h, 21
    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21Ummmm.... she's half Dutchb, 21I'll let you guess which half
  • DB_CooperDB_Cooper Manhatin' 7,823 Posts
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    h, 21
    b, 21Ummmm.... she's half Dutch
    b, 21I'll let you guess which half
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    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21The back half? img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/breakface.gif" alt="" 21
  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    /font1
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    h, 21
    b, 21
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    h, 21
    b, 21Ummmm.... she's half Dutch
    b, 21I'll let you guess which half
    b, 21
    b, 21
    h, 21
    font class="post"1
    b, 21
    b, 21The back half?
    img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/breakface.gif" alt="" 21
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    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21LOLb, 21b, 21I have an informal agreement with the missus that if I get the chance (God willing), I can do Carol with no comebacks. In return, she gets to do likewise with any or all of Simon Cowell img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/oof.gif" alt="" 21, Russell Brand img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/ooo.gif" alt="" 21, or Bill Pullman img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/icegrill.gif" alt="" 21b, 21The odds are not so great from my point of view but I think we'll both survive.b, 21b, 21So I have imagineered the encounter with Carol (not the early 80s grotesque, but the later version) thus:b, 21b, 21We meet by chance; meaningful and lusty glances are exchanged. I'm brave and bold, nay fearless. I invite her for dinner.b, 21Over fries with mayo and two pints of Oranjeboom lager (well she is a Dotchie after all), we chat about Richard Whitely and I probe her gently about Countdown gossip.b, 21"Is it really true, Carol, that you burst into the dressing room to find Des O'Connor, on all fours..." etc etc.b, 21We repair to a sleazy Soho hotel.b, 21After some pleasant games of Sudoku, in which I let Carol win natch, I ramp the mood up with some dirty math talk.b, 21"You know you love it, proving the angles in a triangle equal 180 degrees from first principles, you dutty dutty dutch hottie"b, 21b, 21The rest I'm afraid has to remain in my private mindgarden.b, 21b, 21I don't want Carol getting wind of this before it happens.b, 21b, 21 img src="http://img.thesun.co.uk/multimedia/archive/00383/SNF07LETAN_280_383164a.jpg"1
  • DB_CooperDB_Cooper Manhatin' 7,823 Posts
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    h, 21
    b, 21We meet by chance; meaningful and lusty glances are exchanged. I'm brave and bold, nay fearless. I invite her for dinner.
    b, 21Over fries with mayo and two pints of Oranjeboom lager (well she is a Dotchie after all), we chat about Richard Whitely and I probe her gently about Countdown gossip.
    b, 21"Is it really true, Carol, that you burst into the dressing room to find Des O'Connor, on all fours..." etc etc.
    b, 21We repair to a sleazy Soho hotel.
    b, 21After some pleasant games of Sudoku, in which I let Carol win natch, I ramp the mood up with some dirty math talk.
    b, 21"You know you love it, proving the angles in a triangle equal 180 degrees from first principles, you dutty dutty dutch hottie"
    b, 21
    b, 21
    b, 21
    h, 21
    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21Don't take this the wrong way, but there's something uniquely British about this fantasy.
  • johmbolayajohmbolaya 4,472 Posts
    a href="http://imageshack.us" target="_blank"1img src="http://img511.imageshack.us/img511/1110/nigellalawsonbreastsuppgw8.jpg"1/a1b, 21b, 21a href="http://imageshack.us" target="_blank"1img src="http://img136.imageshack.us/img136/2563/dawnfrenchlq5.jpg"1/a1
  • skelskel You can't cheat karma 5,033 Posts
    Chubby Britwomen stand up!
  • ajrafflesajraffles 124 Posts
    That might take a little while. . .
  • DB_CooperDB_Cooper Manhatin' 7,823 Posts
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    h, 21
    b, 21Chubby Britwomen stand up!
    b, 21
    b, 21
    h, 21
    font class="post"1b, 21b, 21What part of the game is fat?
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