Who knew a bar was a good place for an education? Last night, I learned several interesting lessons from Double Dutch. Let me share them with you:
1. By demand, my ass must always be where the rhythm is.
2. When a cute boy offers to walk out with you don't be a stupid beer obsessed fool. Drop your half drunken beer on the bar and walk out with him.
3. A chode in a sweet ass hat, is still a chode.
4. Stand nearest the door, ALWAYS, because it's hot in this mutha. This will help you avoid "afro-itis". (Naturally straight haired people - this is your "Ask An Ethnic Person" lesson of the day).
6. The high powered hand dryer in the restroom ALSO serves as a high powered floor pee dryer. So, as you sit (with feet held up off the ground of course) reach over and hand cue the dryer to do it's thing. This way you're helping clean AND getting your resistance training/ flexibility/ab workout on all at the same time!
The floor pee dryer helps you not step out, slip and land your ass in a puddle of pee right there in front of the cute boy who is offering to walk out with you.... pardon me, right in front of the cute boy who is now running away as if he has no clue who you are.
7. Dudes, sometimes, have bad pee aim which leads to reason #6 on my infamous list "Why I Remain Single".
8. Sometimes, all you have to do is the patented "lean and smile" and a kind and courteous bartender reads your mind and drops a Trumer Pils in front of you in six seconds flat. It's what we professionals call "Beervana".
9. Always get a pretty girl friend of yours to talk to a chode in a sweet ass hat to lead him into a conversation of where said chode bought said sweet ass hat. Then go buy sweet ass hat and look better than his chode ass in it.
10. DO NOT stare at white people when they dance. It is rude.
11. Fergilicious and AC/DC should never be placed in a mix together. NEVER! That's is just musical blasphemy.
12. Light fixtures really can set the mood of a place.
13. A bar is always better with a dance area.
14. Beer is my friend. Chodes in sweet ass hats are not.
hahaha, lets just say that when my sister opened up her tea shop, every single person she knew wrote a 5 star review on yelp.
Yelp, like any open review site, requires a few grains of salt but in general, I'd rather look stuff up there vs. the frustratingly dense style that Chowhound forces upon its users.
On the outer mission tip (past Cesar Chavez) Front Porch and Emmy's Spaghetti Shack will hook you up with some good food. Emmy's service sucks though. Front Porch has some pretty good fried chicken and they used to have Dungeness Crap Risoto.
On the outer mission tip (past Cesar Chavez) Front Porch and Emmy's Spaghetti Shack will hook you up with some good food. Emmy's service sucks though. Front Porch has some pretty good fried chicken and they used to have Dungeness Crap Risoto.
I dunno - I never found Emmy's to be that great (this based on at least 3-4 trips there). "Home style spaghetti" sounds good in theory but really, it's perhaps a bit too much like home insofar as you could probably cook up a batch yourself. I'm biased though: if I want some pasta, spaghetti and meatballs is rarely what I'm hankering for. Is there good Italian in the Mission, otherwise? I don't usually associate the two.
Them Spaghetti balls are good. And the sides are really good too. The brussell sprouts with pine nuts and good too. I stand by it. I've had some really good meals there.
And, besides, why am I the only one that gets shitted on with his comment? There have been like 20 places mentioned. Everyone is cool with every place that is mentioned, but I mention Emmy's and someone has to talk shit. At least O-dub added something positive. What the fuck?
Them Spaghetti balls are good. And the sides are really good too. The brussell sprouts with pine nuts and good too. I stand by it. I've had some really good meals there.
And, besides, why am I the only one that gets shitted on with his comment? There have been like 20 places mentioned. Everyone is cool with every place that is mentioned, but I mention Emmy's and someone has to talk shit. At least O-dub added something positive. What the fuck?
whatever, i rode for emmys earlier. i like them and have never had salty spaghetti there! we both agree their service sucks though. i said front porch was worth a visit too. same owners! the fried chicken IS the best.
Saying - I think Yelp is useful so long as one doesn't treat their comments as gospel. But what are the alternatives (I'd love to know them, in all seriousness)?
As for being hella yuppified, well, the whole idea behind things like Yelp and Chowhound is what you could call a foodie revolution that's suddenly turning everyone epicurean. I can't say I'm immune to that either but regardless, the net effect is that everyone wants to talk like they're Ruth Reichl and treat every meal like it's the French Laundry.
I don't find that inherently wack but the manifestations of it can be.
Saying - I think Yelp is useful so long as one doesn't treat their comments as gospel. But what are the alternatives (I'd love to know them, in all seriousness)?
did you yell the words to pocket full of stones today?
yeah I thought so bitch
I would also like to mention I kicked it with this kid I haven't seen since he was a broke ass veitnamese kid lviing in the projects riding bmx and making me get up off the floor of the video store so I could make it thrrough a hang over. fucfk fancyu shit, some realness went down today
Saying - I think Yelp is useful so long as one doesn't treat their comments as gospel. But what are the alternatives (I'd love to know them, in all seriousness)?
likeminded friends?
Sure but that's not going to help if you're trying to find a new place to eat and none of your friends can help.
Comments
THIS IF FUCKIN' STUPID
Copied from yelp.com:
Who knew a bar was a good place for an education? Last night, I learned several interesting lessons from Double Dutch. Let me share them with you:
1. By demand, my ass must always be where the rhythm is.
2. When a cute boy offers to walk out with you don't be a stupid beer obsessed fool. Drop your half drunken beer on the bar and walk out with him.
3. A chode in a sweet ass hat, is still a chode.
4. Stand nearest the door, ALWAYS, because it's hot in this mutha. This will help you avoid "afro-itis". (Naturally straight haired people - this is your "Ask An Ethnic Person" lesson of the day).
6. The high powered hand dryer in the restroom ALSO serves as a high powered floor pee dryer. So, as you sit (with feet held up off the ground of course) reach over and hand cue the dryer to do it's thing. This way you're helping clean AND getting your resistance training/ flexibility/ab workout on all at the same time!
The floor pee dryer helps you not step out, slip and land your ass in a puddle of pee right there in front of the cute boy who is offering to walk out with you.... pardon me, right in front of the cute boy who is now running away as if he has no clue who you are.
7. Dudes, sometimes, have bad pee aim which leads to reason #6 on my infamous list "Why I Remain Single".
8. Sometimes, all you have to do is the patented "lean and smile" and a kind and courteous bartender reads your mind and drops a Trumer Pils in front of you in six seconds flat. It's what we professionals call "Beervana".
9. Always get a pretty girl friend of yours to talk to a chode in a sweet ass hat to lead him into a conversation of where said chode bought said sweet ass hat. Then go buy sweet ass hat and look better than his chode ass in it.
10. DO NOT stare at white people when they dance. It is rude.
11. Fergilicious and AC/DC should never be placed in a mix together. NEVER! That's is just musical blasphemy.
12. Light fixtures really can set the mood of a place.
13. A bar is always better with a dance area.
14. Beer is my friend. Chodes in sweet ass hats are not.
^^^^^^^^^^^^ LOVES AC/DC MIXED WITH FERGALICIOUS.
hahaha, lets just say that when my sister opened up her tea shop, every single person she knew wrote a 5 star review on yelp.
Yelp, like any open review site, requires a few grains of salt but in general, I'd rather look stuff up there vs. the frustratingly dense style that Chowhound forces upon its users.
What tea shop?
I dunno - I never found Emmy's to be that great (this based on at least 3-4 trips there). "Home style spaghetti" sounds good in theory but really, it's perhaps a bit too much like home insofar as you could probably cook up a batch yourself. I'm biased though: if I want some pasta, spaghetti and meatballs is rarely what I'm hankering for. Is there good Italian in the Mission, otherwise? I don't usually associate the two.
"Dungeness Crap Risoto"?
MMMMMMMMMM.
So does their food. Tastes like someone dumped a pound of salt on the spaghetti.
And, besides, why am I the only one that gets shitted on with his comment? There have been like 20 places mentioned. Everyone is cool with every place that is mentioned, but I mention Emmy's and someone has to talk shit. At least O-dub added something positive. What the fuck?
whatever, i rode for emmys earlier. i like them and have never had salty spaghetti there! we both agree their service sucks though. i said front porch was worth a visit too. same owners! the fried chicken IS the best.
shit this makes me want to do a thread..
fuck that shit, I( g0t drunk to day ande yelled at bun b, the world is good. fuck street gay
As for being hella yuppified, well, the whole idea behind things like Yelp and Chowhound is what you could call a foodie revolution that's suddenly turning everyone epicurean. I can't say I'm immune to that either but regardless, the net effect is that everyone wants to talk like they're Ruth Reichl and treat every meal like it's the French Laundry.
I don't find that inherently wack but the manifestations of it can be.
this motherfucker went to the male streetwear convention.
yeah I thought so bitch
likeminded friends?
I would also like to mention I kicked it with this kid I haven't seen since he was a broke ass veitnamese kid lviing in the projects riding bmx and making me get up off the floor of the video store so I could make it thrrough a hang over. fucfk fancyu shit, some realness went down today
Sure but that's not going to help if you're trying to find a new place to eat and none of your friends can help.
Of course, maybe I just need more friends.
isn't this Cancun on Mission though?