This weekend I will face my biggest fear.
Swayze
14,705 Posts
I'm spending Thanksgiving in Texas.I think a have a real phobia, even though I couldn't find a word for it online.I fear rednecks and hillbillies too. Its an irrational fear, like most phobias, I guess. I'm not proud of it, but there it is.Texas. It sends shivers down the spine.Line Dancing.Really big belt buckles.Country Music.And I'll be visiting from one of the 2 most dangerous places to visit from. When you visit the country of Texas and somebody asks where you are from, the 2 answers you don't want to give are "California" and "New York". Especially California. The rest of my family has taken a real liking to texas. In fact, they now consider themselves to be Texan. They don't understand my hatered. They don't understand why I joined the army just to leave texas at the age of 17. I realize that my phobia is like, bad. I've met others who passionately hate Texas too, but I suppose that doesn't make it OK.I don't know what to do though. Southern accents make me cringe. If I had to have surgery and the doctor had a southern accent I would freak the fuck out. I beleive this to be a genuine phobia. I don't that that it is "ignorance" either, since i never had my phobia until I was forced to live there. That, and I am completely aware that this is seriously Perhaps some psych majors here can analyze and fix me. I'm just being honest.
Comments
Hot chicks, football. They must have some good mexican food.
I came down from NYC in '79 and learned real fast to say "The only thing good about the North is the road leading South" when confronted by some redneck mofos.
Truth is that in Dallas about 50% of the people here are transplants who've migrated over the last 30 years, mostly from northern cities.
I've never SEEN Line Dancing, been to Billy Bob's or wore cowboy boots and I've survived just fine.
Kind of funny that your fear over the holiday is a State, most folks fear spending time with dumb ass relatives!!
I enjoy visiting my family, its just that there are 49 other states that I would rather visit.
Go visit them then. We got plenty of fany Cali boys already, I'm sure.
DON'T MESS WITH TEXAS.
I keed. And I know you're a commodian. But still, you really shouldn't write off whole states like that.
I know dude, that's my problem! The best man at my wedding was born and raised in TX. One of my favorite co-workers is Texan and actally goes by the nickname "redneck".... but alas, I'm falling in the "some of my best friends are __________" category here....
So it was with the knowledge that I could potentially come off like a complete asshole that I typed up this post. My fear of southern accents is really bad. I mean, thats just MEAN. But, I feel like I can't help it. And then when I meet really nice people with southern accents I feel so guilty for assuming that they are retarded until proven otherwise. And then I tell myself that I won't do that anymore... until I hear a "ya'll" and instinctively think "retard."
I think that by admitting I have a problem, I actually have made some sort of step forward. But now what?
Perhaps it goes back to highschool when some redneck shitkicker wanted to fight me because I laughed at his cowboy hat. Man... that dude HATED me.
awesome! my grandma used to call the toilet a "commode". I always that that was funny. As if by giving it a nicer name it becomes something more than a bowl that you shit into.
Welcome to the United States of America.
There are no hillbillies in Texas, that stops in Tennessese and Virginia.
I would love to visit Texas, especially Luckenbach.
I guess you think people in Kentucky where no shoes, well they don't.
As a regular offduty person though, I admit to being afraid of Texas myself. Then again, I'm afraid of americans. I'm afraid of the world. I'm afraid I can't help it. I'm afraid I can't - heeeeeelp iiiit...
Shiiiiiit Dizzy, it COULD be worse. You could be visiting Milwaukee!!!! I was in Dallas last May for a professional conference. I really had a good time. People were really friendly. I considered applying for faculty jobs down there this Fall UT-Arlington, UT-Dallas, and SMU but changed my mind (too far from my old parents-related).
Peace,
Big Stacks from Kakalak
If I were you, I'd be more worried about the candy paint, sizzurp, and, most fearsome of all, grillz.
Go here.
It was designed by Tadao Ando
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tadao_Ando
Its a pretty amazing building and collection. And it's right next to the Kimbell
i believe they are called Bubbahs in texas.
DFW is kind of like one giant span of freeways leading toooooooooooo.........
nowhere.
(no offense, rich!)
so just stay in the non-space and you'll be fine Dizzy.
with that said, this rust-belt northern-bred, recently re-transplanted east coaster quite misses Texas. Never would have thought i'd spend a year living there and it was a great place to be....
mail me some roadside BBQ please.
I'm suprised nobody has called me out for being a total dickhead or something.
there's still time my friend.
FAR from it! My wife is from Nebraska. It was serious that first Thanksgiving I visited.
Steel yourself for culture shock.
i summed it up with, if you find yourself in an akward situation over dinner with strangers, you can always opt out of a convo by getting a 2nd or 3rd helping of food, then have some lonely time, blaming it on the itis.
good luck and have a joyous time.
You were definitely in the right city in Texas to have that experience.
I made some jokes above, but I don't think I'd want to live in any other city in Texas except Austin. It skews my view of the whole state. I could fuck with D/FW (spent many years there) but I think it would grate on my soul too much.
Texas is crazy. Texans are crazy. Sounds like you're just going to suburbia though Dizzy, so you'll be fine, trust me.
Bubbas also = "good ol' boys".
living in the right city, perhaps.
but i did travel and spend some time in at least 6 - 8 other cities in the state.
with that said, no, i don't want to live in Waco.
liked el paso though. that was a cool city... surprisingly.
So you'll be hanging with a bunch of suburban, upper class/upper middle class folks that have probably never seen a cowboy, or gone line-dancing, or know any music besides becky rap and pop music?
Hmm ... thinking about it, that does sound unpleasant.
When in doubt, head up the road to Denton. It's like Austin lite.
If you like that kind of thing.
Yeah, I've been to Denton, its not a bad place actually.
Actually its more like:
suburban, upper class/upper middle class folks that pretend to be mall cowboys, go line-dancing because "oh my god, its so texan, ya'll!", or know any music besides becky rap and country pop music.... and have the requisite "I wasn't born in Texas but I got here as fast as I could" bumper sticker....
Yes, that's a fairly easy image to conjure up. Good luck, and make sure to tell everyone you meet who is from that area that you're a Redskins or Eagles fan. That should grease the wheels nice and good for you.
Wait, no, don't do that.
I'm spending Thanksgiving
1. In rural Utah, middle of no where snowy mountians (very beutiful and very Deliverance at the same time). Closest town about 10 miles away population..... 2 gas stations and a laundry mat.
2. In a hunting cabin.
3. With 30 people who I've never met that are all relatives of my girlfriend's-brothers-wife.
4. About 14 of these people will be children aging 2-16.
5. They are all red neck hunters.
AND...........
WAIT FOR IT...........
6. I'm a vegitarian!!!!!
Nice knowing you. About monday I'd start doing e-bay searches for "dead boyfriends record collection".