Dudes... LAYOFFS RULE!!! (NRR)
Jonny_Paycheck
17,825 Posts
Thank you to my very wealthy and powerful company for telling me "you don't have to come to work anymore", meanwhile lacing me with 8 mos. worth of rent cake. A really heartfelt thank you.Now, I will proceed to "work" on some "real world moves". Contrary to the popular opinion on this board, you can work hard even when not chained to a desk all day.I will be holding my ceremonial burning of one sacrificial suit later this evening.Truth be told, I had wanted to quit for some time, but with the spectre of mass layoffs looming, I thought I'd bide my time and see if my name came up. Lucky meI'd like to thank Soulstrut for helping me ensure my bosses that I was an unproductive investment, and that they'd be much better off paying me to *not* work than paying me to not work.Yes, I'm drinking beer.Plaese to share your layoff stories! This one was horrible, people running out of the office every half hour, tears streaming... entire floors decimated... grown men sitting in their offices weeping...
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She was a horrible bitch though.
Congratulations on Plan B becoming Plan A, so to speak.
Welcome to the club, Jonny NoPaycheck. I'm still "unemployed" since my December layoff but it's all good - I make my own hours and rake in the cake through freelance design, DJing, and selling records. I need to get my salary weight up, but hell, I'm basically getting paid (relatively) more for doing less so it's all good. Being self-employed is cool as long as you like your boss.
make sure you get your office supplies on yo... post-it notes, gluesticks, pens, reams of paper, paper clips etc... thats some shit i hate having to buy cause i know i can lift it off of work.
does this mean you can collect unemployment while youre at it? if so, that is uber nice!
-rich
i have been "working" since then, but i need to get my grind on a little harder here, i been slacking and its catching up to me.
congratulations jonny on being a jobless brooklynite.
Throw a party, people. The nutsacks are the ones who have to stay!
Congrats J*n*y...
Yeah I was just telling the homie over the phone, this is where *real work* gets serious.
But you know, the severence was from me being with the firm for three years. This is not 8 months severance, it's 8 months rent... I gotta hustle for the spending cash. But coupled with a generous tax return I am pretty comfortable in the interim.
MORE NEWS AT 11 (real headz know the dealz)
WHINER! I got no notice, no severance, and they stole $8000+ out of my retirement account that they'd still have if I hadn't done some sleuthing. Grrr... just thinking about it make me wanna barbecue some popsicles on my ice grill.
My first layoff went something like that. It was when the entire staff of incite Video Gaming and incite PC Gaming got laid off. We were given no warning at all--though in retrospect, perhaps I could've figured it out by reading between the lines, but when they started talking about triple stock splits and make-good offers to advertisers, my eyes would glaze over.
So anyway, we come into work one Monday morning. Not just any Monday morning, the Monday of ship week, which means the final week to get the magazine done and off to the printers. So this is the week everybody really busts ass and pulls long hours to make this magazine come together. People had been working over the weekend, people came into work early, alladat. Only we're unable to log onto the computer network. Contact IS, he says it's out of his hands. Hmmmm. Then comes word that the CEO wants to meet with the entire office. This can't be good.
We all crowd into the conference room, and the CEO--this German weirdo named Torsten--tells us that we're all laid off, incite is no more, please clear out our desks and be out of the building by noon.
Needless to say, we don't take this very well. They handled this very disrespectfully (and to top it off, our severence pay was a whopping two weeks) and just dropped a bomb on everybody with no warning. The people who worked on incite.com really got fucked because they were unable to get onto the network to make copies of their site code, and the site had been taken down. They did all that work and had nothing to show for it.
Personally, I was stunned. I had never been fired or laid off or anything, so I didn't know how to take it. This job had rescued me from the hell that was Barnes & Noble, and suddenly it was gone. I got over my shock by joining everybody else in looting the fucking place. Folks were taking everything that wasn't nailed down. I swiped a Dreamcast out of the game lab (this was before the commercial release PS2 and Xbox, so Dreamcast was still kinda the hotshit system). Other people did even better, stealing the PS2 and Xbox debugs (not-for-commercial-release hardware that allowed editors to play incomplete builds of games for preview purposes). I heard somebody managed to steal the nameplate off Torsten's desk, which, if true, makes him a hero of mine.
I've got other layoff stories--three of them, to be exact, but the incite one stands out for being the first and most devastating. Yours is the kind of layoff I wouldn't mind, though, Paycheck. Severence to pay eight months of rent? Yes, plaese!
Jealous.
funny thing is, about two months ago my old boss, who i am friends with asked me to come back to the same position. i considered for a second but i didn't like that i hesitated, but they still haven't filled the position. if they gave me the axe once i'm sure they would do it again.
REAL HEADZ KNOW DA DEAL ALERT!!! [/b]
I was about to say the same thing
1). Both are from Cali.
2). Both have various alias accounts
3). Both sell records
4). Both have friends who post on here
NOT FOR NOTHING!
I love this subject! It's now sink or swim time and severence are your waterwings.
Mine were inflated for a goddamn year and I loved it!
But, my story... I walk in ready to quit the Monday after a week's vacation in the Bahamas. I walk in the door and notice that there are quite a few friendly faces abscent. Downsizing was in the air and minutes later: "Hey... How was your vacation? Really? Great! Well, some changes were made when you were gone and we need to talk. There is a slight problem..." "Slight problem" = Lump sum severance payment from them, 2 months of free health/dental care, and 1 year of 1st & 15th govt severance.
Congrats!
Got a call from the owner/my boss that afternoon, apologizing....filing Chapter 13 after Chapter 11 had gone badly...he dropped off our last checks personally. He was a good guy(lousy bizness man).
I heard thru the grapevine some "creditors" had a "talk" with him in the parking garage of his condo later that year and put him in the hospital.
Since then, I usually quit first. Never been with a large enuff organization to make firing/layoff profitable.
Anyhow, welcome to the club of trying to find ways to spend your time each day. I'm not the type that's really good about spending his time wisely when left to his own devices so lately I've mostly been playing a lot of Halo and Tiger Woods 2005 on Xbox, and pretending I'm going to put records up on eBay to make some scratch. Hope your unemployment is more productive!
Should have showed up Tuesday.
K.
Oh please, academics is where it's at. A couple months in the summer, sabaticals. A friend of mine is getting 2 years sabbatical, asking for 3. The second year he's getting 80% of salary, the third would be something less...but still. got damn.
Anyway, You should try to travel for at least a month and sublet your place out. That way you'll basically travel for free. Good luck on bustin' moves in the RW.
Woo hoo! Three day weekend!
Why I oughta....
The only time I was ever fired/laid off I was working my first job after dropping out of college, doing paste-up/layout at this shitty little newspaper. The company shared space with an "old time radio" museum (so you got to see pictures of Edger Bergen and Charlie McCarthy on the way to the shitter...) and was owned by the same people.
The head graphics guy was an older dude that had retired from the magazine business in NYC and working there to make ends meet. His second in command was this semi-sleazy guy that knew the owners from hanging around the local harness racing track.
So, old guy gets into a car accident, breaking his arm, and can't work. Sleazy guy engineers a takeover of the operation, and old-guy, me and a few other people get the axe.
A month later I started at a big newspaper (where I still work 20 years later).
The end....
First, a little advice from someone who's been there.
Do not be at all surprised if a few well-earned days of lounging before making moves turns into, "Why are they showing the World Series in...holy shit, it's October!" Make the *most* of this time. If you own a video game system (PS2, Xbox, etc.), get rid of it immediately. And try to reign in your Struttin', 'cause Lord knows this place can be a timesuck (which can suck if you're not killin' time on the boss' dime).
Now...congrats! I've always maintained that jobs are like relationships: breakups are always for the best, even if you can't see that in the here and now. Luckily, you can.
My next job is working on Video Game OST's for Rockstar.
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