myspace bulletin (the mack R?)

sonofsamsonofsam 680 Posts
edited April 2006 in Strut Central
i got this bulletin today on myspace with the title "the sweetest things a guy can do for a girl"... it read very much like the mack advice column thread from a while back, so i thought some of you might like it... plus, it has a lot of really good tips for treating a lady rightKiss her in the movie theatres....Hold her hand while you talk....Tell her she looks pretty....Look her in the eye when you talk to her....Tell her stupid jokes....Let her mess with your hair....Just walk around with her....Fuck her like she has never been fucked before...Look at her like she's the only girl you see...Tickle her even if she says stop....Smack her ass just because you like it...When she starts swearing at you tell her you love her....Let her fall asleep in your arms....Finger her in public....Get her mad, then kiss her....Tease her and let her tease you back....Stay up with her all night when she's sick....Watch her favorite movie....Kiss her forehead....Give her hickies in sexual spots on her body...Write her letters....If she asks you to go to a show with her, go....Let her wear your clothes....When she's sad, have sex with her....Buy her ice cream....Let her take all the nude photos of you she wants....Kiss her in the rain...And when you fall in love with her, tell her"finger her in public"

  Comments


  • hcrinkhcrink 8,729 Posts
    I do not see "poke her in the butt" anywhere on that list.

  • parsecparsec 5,087 Posts
    fishscales

  • SupergoodSupergood 1,213 Posts
    When she's sad, have sex with her....

    awesome!

  • Phill_MostPhill_Most 4,594 Posts
    Wow... well, this is what that little advice column really said before some myspace comedian got ahold of it. These are actually some pretty good tips for nimrods who want to be successful with the ladies but are lacking anything even remotely resembling a clue.


    28 ways to make a girl smile[/b]
    1. Tell her she is beautiful, {not hot, fine, or sexy}
    2. Hold her hand at any moment, even if it is just for a second.
    3. Kiss her on the forehead.
    4. Leave her voice messages to wake up to.
    5. Always tell her you Love her at any and all times.
    6. When she is upset, hold her tight and tell her how much she means to you.
    7. Recognize the small things. {They usually mean the most.}
    8. Call her sweet heart or baby.
    9. Sing to her no matter how horrible your voice is.
    10. Pick her over all the other girls you hang out with.
    11. Write her notes. {She loves them}
    12. Introduce her to family and friends as your girlfriend.
    13. Play with her hair.
    14. Pick her up, tickle her and play-wrestle with her.
    15. Sit in the park and just talk to her.
    16. Tell her funny jokes. Tell her stupid jokes. Just tell her jokes.
    17. Throw pebbles at her window in the middle of the night just because you missed her.
    18. Let her fall asleep in your arms.
    19. Carve your names into a tree.
    20. If she's mad at you, kiss her.
    21. Give her piggy back rides.
    22. Bring her flowers just because.
    23. Treat her the same around your friends as you do when your alone.
    24. Look her in the eyes and smile.
    25. Let her take as many pictures of you as she wants.
    26. Slow dance with her, even if there isn't any music playing.
    27. Kiss her in the rain.

    These helpful hints are also very good for any of you aspiring pimps who are looking to turn out some young hotties who have self esteem issue.

  • i do all that shit, except the faviort movie thing

  • Phill_MostPhill_Most 4,594 Posts
    Next up: 28 ways to make a girl cum[/b]

  • edith headedith head 5,106 Posts
    where is "tell her 'you gets no butt dawg'" on that list?


  • mylatencymylatency 10,475 Posts
    where is "tell her 'you gets no butt dawg'" on that list?


    lol

  • edith headedith head 5,106 Posts

    steve nash is the new jesus

  • djrdjr 511 Posts
    show her your expedit with raers facing out

  • edith headedith head 5,106 Posts
    - keep refreshing and outbid her with 7 seconds to go
    - take weird self-portraits with face records, post it on the internet, and then email her a link to those photos with the subject "happy birthday, baby!"
    - when you flake on dinner plans to go digging with your friends and she looks upset, say "YOU MAD DOGGIE?" when she slaps you, say

  • faux_rillzfaux_rillz 14,343 Posts
    - keep refreshing and outbid her with 7 seconds to go

    [Reynaldo]That's a great look![/Reynaldo]

  • Danno3000Danno3000 2,850 Posts
    I feel the need to point out that myspace bulletins are a good way to judge whether someone is a fucktard. The test is simple: people who take the time to share their favourite colour, morning routine, and luncheon meat and believe a failure to do so will result in bad luck, no sex, or the death of a loved one are fucktards. For some reason those lists really infuriate me even though I've learnt never to open them.

  • DjArcadianDjArcadian 3,630 Posts
    I feel the need to point out that myspace bulletins are a good way to judge whether someone is a fucktard. The test is simple: people who take the time to share their favourite colour, morning routine, and luncheon meat and believe a failure to do so will result in bad luck, no sex, or the death of a loved one are fucktards. For some reason those lists really infuriate me even though I've learnt never to open them.

    There's hardly a girl on my friends list that DOESN'T fill out these bulletins. It has less to do with how much of a "fucktard" they are but more to do with how much spare time they have on their hands.

  • djsheepdjsheep 3,620 Posts
    kenny u payin' attention dun?

  • Danno3000Danno3000 2,850 Posts
    I feel the need to point out that myspace bulletins are a good way to judge whether someone is a fucktard. The test is simple: people who take the time to share their favourite colour, morning routine, and luncheon meat and believe a failure to do so will result in bad luck, no sex, or the death of a loved one are fucktards. For some reason those lists really infuriate me even though I've learnt never to open them.

    There's hardly a girl on my friends list that DOESN'T fill out these bulletins. It has less to do with how much of a "fucktard" they are but more to do with how much spare time they have on their hands.

    Ok, maybe "fucktard" was too strong a word. Even so, I'm not convinced...

  • ariel_calmerariel_calmer 3,762 Posts
    I feel the need to point out that myspace bulletins are a good way to judge whether someone is a fucktard. The test is simple: people who take the time to share their favourite colour, morning routine, and luncheon meat and believe a failure to do so will result in bad luck, no sex, or the death of a loved one are fucktards. For some reason those lists really infuriate me even though I've learnt never to open them.

    maroon
    coffee
    pastrami

  • DjArcadianDjArcadian 3,630 Posts
    I feel the need to point out that myspace bulletins are a good way to judge whether someone is a fucktard. The test is simple: people who take the time to share their favourite colour, morning routine, and luncheon meat and believe a failure to do so will result in bad luck, no sex, or the death of a loved one are fucktards. For some reason those lists really infuriate me even though I've learnt never to open them.

    maroon
    coffee
    pastrami

    green
    coffee on muni/BART
    roast beef

  • SwayzeSwayze 14,705 Posts
    say "YOU MAD DOGGIE?" when she slaps you, say

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  • keithvanhornkeithvanhorn 3,855 Posts
    I do not see "poke her in the butt" anywhere on that list.

    Soul Station Manager: Mr. Phelps, I see you've listed "dabut" under your hobbies?
    Leon Phelps: Yeah, that's "da butt."


  • BreakSelfBreakSelf 2,925 Posts
    show her your expedit with raers facing out


    hahahahahah

  • FatbackFatback 6,746 Posts
    Ok, maybe "fucktard" was too strong a word.

    Never that, son. See also Bitchtard, Asstard, Fauxtard...
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