Mother's day Sunday, MAMA Jokes today!

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  • DeeRockDeeRock 1,836 Posts
    Your mom is so old, I told her to act her age and she died!!!!

    Your momma so fat she gotta rock stretch jewelry...............

    Your momma so fat she put her bvd panties on and it read boulevard..............

    Your mom is so old her social security number is 1 .............................

  • Big_ChanBig_Chan 5,088 Posts




    Yeah! Tell your moms to mind her business

    Your mom's in my business, she's in my business
    Can't you see girl that your mom's trying to end
    this?
    Your mom's in our business
    Now tell your moms to mind her business 'Before I
    let go'

    Your mom's in our business, she's in our business
    Can't you see girl that your mom's trying to end
    this?
    Your mom's in our business
    Now tell your moms to mind her business 'Before I
    let go'

    When I first met your moms, I gave your mom
    respect
    But now I see she knows me, I see that she
    suspects
    I'm some bad guy, I don't know why
    You have to tell your mother lies about you and I
    But when your first told me, she said that I was
    a no-no
    Cause of my haircut and people call me Solo
    Before the time you said, you really didn't care
    Now you tell me to change my name, or even cut my
    hair
    How would you ever go become somebody's wife
    And at the age of 22 you let your mother run your
    life?
    Me, I'm not the type to tell your moms to get
    lost
    Yell out loud to flip and get my point across
    See I think you should tell your moms to leave us
    two alone
    And stop reading our love letters and
    evesdropping on the phone
    Cause if you really liked my, you'd let your
    mommy know
    She gotta mind her business 'Before I let go'

    Your mom's in our business, she's in our business
    Can't you see girl that your mom's trying to end
    this?
    Your mom's in our business
    Now tell your moms to mind her business 'Before I
    let go' (Repeat 2x)

    Remember your sister and her boyfriend Sam Seed?
    Your momma's the real reason why your sister lost
    her man
    Her and sam went together, for a real long time
    But Sam controlled her body while your mom
    controlled her mind
    Not saying she was hurt when your moms made 'em
    break up
    Deep down I could tell, though, your sister
    wanted to make up
    With Sam, because she wanted to become his wife
    And now she can't do that because your mother
    runs her life
    You baby, you do the same things, too
    You always want to to the crazy things your mommy
    wants you to do
    Like when we went to the movie, she had to come
    along
    I went back and forth and forth and back for
    peanuts and popcorn
    She took advantage, cause I was living fat
    I couldn't even watch the movie, she kept me
    running back
    For something that she wanted somewhere else in
    the store
    I walked and got it all til the man said there's
    no more
    And when I got back to the car, she took her time
    to move over
    When I sat in the car, my movie was like over
    I was mad, hurt, I didn't want to talk
    Deep down I wanted you and your mommy both to
    walk
    I took you home anyway, like what the heck
    Cause I was raised to treat people's mothers with
    respect

    But when we got to your home, we wasn't left
    alone
    She waited there in the car with us until I
    headed home
    You called me on the phone, saying you were alone
    But that's a lie because I heard your moms
    breathing on the phone
    And if you really like me, let your moms know
    She should mind her business 'Before I let go'

    Your mom's in our business, she's in our business
    Can't you see girl that your mom's trying to end
    this?
    Your mom's in our business
    Now tell your moms to mind her business 'Before I
    let go' (Repeat 2x)

    Without a doubt, me, like when I come to your
    house
    She'll ask me crazy questions and start looking
    in my mouth
    Her friends start laughing and I feel just like a
    jerk
    I told 'em I don't know where my mom and dad work
    I really know where they work, but that's between
    them and me
    I can't be putting mom and dad's business in the
    street
    Cause if I told her that my family both work for
    the state
    Right after that she would've asked me how much
    money do they make
    Then she'd go around the town, bragging and
    boasting
    Telling the neighborhood what my family's
    grossing
    Your moms, your moms, why is she so nosey?
    She plays me like a game but I'm no
    ring-around-the-rosey
    I even seen your dad at the family barbeque
    He said 'I don't see nothing wrong with my
    daugher seeing you'
    But it's your wife mister, she don't think that
    I'm charming
    She thinks she's Mr. Whippit and she thinks I'll
    squeeze her Charmin
    I promise I won't do this to your daugher, calm
    man
    Cause when I'm with girls, my reputation is not
    harming
    If I'm not on tour, I'm working out at my house
    I'll pick your daugher up sometime, and I'll even
    take her out
    And every time I try to do this, I see without a
    doubt
    Your wife will follow me around like a cop on a
    stakeout
    And when I told the man that, I thought he would
    help me out
    Til he said 'I can't tell her nothing, she'll
    kick me out the house'
    See, I know you girls, I know you girls, I know
    you girls, I know you girls
    Mothers love you, and they're concerned
    But if you don't solve your own problems, then
    how can you learn?
    And guys, if you're in a relationship like this
    Don't be afraid to tell your girlfriend tell your
    moms to mind her business
    But after me and you girl, I'd rather stay Solo
    Because your moms can't mind her business, I'm a
    have to let you go
    Because your mom is in my business

    Your mom's in our business, she's in our business
    Can't you see girl that your mom's trying to end
    this?
    Your mom's in our business
    Now tell your moms to mind her business 'Before I
    let go' (Repeat 2x)


  • SwayzeSwayze 14,705 Posts
    Your moma is so fat the only way she can get in her pockets is if she took of her pants.

  • djdazedjdaze 3,099 Posts
    your mamas so black I looked at her and thought I was asleep

  • nrichnrich 932 Posts
    your momma's so fat she uses a VCR for a pager (read with 1991 intonation)

  • volumenvolumen 2,532 Posts
    your mamma's so fat when she sits around the house, she sits AROUND the house

  • MangomanMangoman 549 Posts
    Yo mama so hairy you almost died of rugburn at birth!

  • Yo mama got a hand tattooed on both of her but cheeks, I seen her at the strip club trying to make'em clap

    Yo mama so old when god said let there be light, she hit the switch

    Yo mama got a tattoo of a turkey on one thigh and santa on the other, so your father would have something to eat between thanksgiving and christmas

    and my favorite quote fom Juice

    "You should show me some respect. I was almost your father, but the line was to long!"

    Peace

  • ElectrodeElectrode Los Angeles 3,129 Posts
    Yo mama's back is so hunchbacked she has to look up to tie her shoes

    Yo mama's like an ass. She has a lot of fat, a lot of hair and a lot of crack.

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