Best crackhead icebreaker before asking for change
Grafwritah
4,184 Posts
Me: Standing next to car at gas pump at the gas station, preparing to put gas in the tank.Crackhead: HEY! SOOOO, WHATCHA DOIN? PUMPIN' GAS?After me looking at her like she was an idiot, she proceeded to ask me for 75 cents "for the bus, or something." It's like, the bus? Really? That's the best you can do?I think I would be more inclined to dole out change if they were at least marginally creative or funny. Like, make me laugh or something. Or do SOMETHING. Like, "Hey, I'll shit my pants for 75 cents!" I'd be all over that.It would blow me away if one of them would be like, "Yeah can I get some change for a rock?" I think that's a much better use for 75 cents than riding public transportation anyway.
Comments
My freshman year at Temple the dorms were/ are on the edge of campus and right on the edge of some rough parts of North Philly. There were a whole group of kids first semester that crossed over into the strung out crack head world of North Philly, most didn't return for a second semester. Most of these kids came from the burbs and had never even been to the city before that. For whatever reason they drifted right past the frat houses and straight to the crack houses. It was kind of surreal seeing these kids losing it in less than three months. Moving in with a new computer and than trying to sell that shit for cash in front of the dorms.
One kid befriended a local female crackhead about 25 years his senior. At some point his roommate walked in on him getting head from said crackhead while smoking rock. Only at Temple.
I agree, though. In these economic times, panhandlers are going to have to step up with the creativity. The marketplace is flooded and it takes work to stand out.
funny part was he was rocking brand new Jordans and a button up. I said keep to steppin bro.
Respond "yep, sure do" and
I've found the best thing to do is act like they're not there. I know it sounds dick, but it avoids the angry bum routine when you tell them you don't have any change.
Porn name revealed.
"2 girls, 18 cups" currently in pre-production.
My buddy said we should panhandle, fun and easy!
2 15yos from the 'burbs.
I ask a guy on his lunch break for spare change.
He told me he had a lot of yard work that needed to be done around his house and if I wanted money he would put me to work.
Not fun, not easy.
That ended my career as a panhandler.
To this day I wont smoke crack or meth, because I can't panhandle.
What about people randomly flipping out on random strangers for no reason?
Conicidentally on the same train ride, out of nowhere dude just goes up to this semi-geeky looking dude, slaps him on the back of the head and is like "What the F*ck is your problem?! Who are you starring at asshole?! Something to that effect haha wow
BTW the best one I got was years ago, a junkie came up and just dropped it str8 up on me... "look bro i this prescription for rohyptnol, but it costs 18.50 and we only got 13 dollars. If you give me 5.50 Ill give you some roeys for yourself"...
and when i told him I didnt F*ck with roeys, he's all cool like, 'thats sweet but you can give them to your missus or something, or sell them bro,"
junkies > carsales men
you gotta stick your hand out first and say "spare change?" before they can say it first. the look they will give you when you do this is priceless.
#1 dude comes in with a trumpet that was clearly run over by a car. proceeds to go into a rather lengthy semi-coherent speech about how he is now forced to play a new kind of music, "Martian Music", due to the state of his horn. And that the only way to make the Martian Music stop was to give him money. He proceeds to play the loudest most ear splitting atonal catastrophe ive ever heard. within 20 seconds people were either bailing out to adjacent cars or handing him $ so he would stop.
#2 just comes up shaking change in an old measuring cup all smiling and jolly - "Hey! Whats the best nation in the world? ....................DOnation!"
I will pay $300 for his private press lp.
not crackheads but getting an early start on their panhandle game
2 boys, 14 year old-ish in Flyers Starter jackets with the thickest philly accents from that section come over to me and say (spelled phoenetically):
" gi ush uh dower shoredeee cuzssssh ish freezsshunn oult "
awesome.
i laughed and told them to beat it
am man, i sold the last one i had a few years back... sorry...
I'm not saying they necessarily need to do a shuck and jive, I'm just saying if they're going to lie to my face so transparently they could at least make it funny.
And yes this man would get change from me...
Hailed by free jazz purists as the "next big thing".