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On The 4 Train Last Night

behemothbehemoth 2,189 Posts
edited October 2008 in Strut Central
i know we all come on here once a month and have some sort of public transportation etiquette discussion and that is cool but i want to take the time to talk about what happened on the train last night. completelyb,121b,121 b,121b,121i get on at 14th St and there are 2 women sitting below me (i am standing). a Spanish woman and a white woman. the white lady is taking up tons of room with her legs all sprawled out and the train is packed. the Spanish lady says "can you please move your legs" and the white lady says "no I will not". the Spanish lady says "someone has a f*cking problem!"b,121b,121the white lady punches this woman dead in her nose and blood starts pouring out. the Spanish woman swings back and clocks her in the mouth. the white lady slides back in the seat and they start yelling at eachother. "you hit me first. you're drunk. you're a psycho. i will F*ck you up". finally a passenger feels the need to separate the 2 so she grabs the white lady and makes her go sit across the train car.b,121b,121the whole time they are arguing. "you punched me in the nose i am going to F*ck you up"b,121b,121"you are not going to do anything or i will call the police. the cops will believe me because I am white"b,121b,121"you are a f*cking racist"b,121b,121"white people aren't racist"b,121b,121at some point another white guy noted that this white woman was a disgrace to white people everywhere and she needs to shut the hell up and quit instigating...b,121b,121so the train is coming to a stop at 59th St and the Spanish lady stands up with a thing of tin foil in her hand and before she gets off the train she runs across the car and smashes this lady in her face with a huge piece of cake! there is cake all over the train. all over me. all over 3 dudes sitting down. all over this baby.b,121b,121they get up and start punching at each other but cant land blows and the fists are flying past my head so me and this other guy physically separate them and let the lady get off the trainb,121b,121the whole ride to 86th St consisted of us all cleaning cake off of our clothes while the white woman continued to talk shit about all ethnic groups which would of resulted in another punch to the mouth at the hands of a 300 lb black woman if she had not gotten off the train.b,121b,121it was nuts!
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  Comments

  • CousinLarryCousinLarry 4,618 Posts
    wow
  • GaryGary 3,982 Posts
    Wow, somehow you wound up in a 3 stooges episode!
  • behemothbehemoth 2,189 Posts
    yea but without my camera. i usually have it on me. in fact no one on the train had a thought to film it. because after it was all said and done people were like b,121b,121"who got that for Youtube?"b,121b,121and everyone is like "oh shit i forgot"
  • DB_CooperDB_Cooper Manhatin' 7,823 Posts
    Are you sure the 300lb woman wasn't just angry at the waste of a perfectly good piece of cake?
  • mordecaimordecai 2,204 Posts
    CAKEFACE X|
  • behemothbehemoth 2,189 Posts
    /font1
    Quote:/font1h,121b,121Are you sure the 300lb woman wasn't just angry at the waste of a perfectly good piece of cake? b,121b,121h,121
    b,121b,121nah. the white lady said something about "you people" and this chick wanted to fight her so bad!b,121b,121the cake had pink frosting on it. it was Angels food i think. it was super messy.b,121b,121and every time we stopped and people got on they were like "what happened here?" and this girl said "you missed the birthday party ya'll!!"
  • GaryGary 3,982 Posts
    thats funny as hell.
  • verb606verb606 2,518 Posts
    /font1
    Quote:/font1h,121b,121b,121"white people aren't racist"b,121b,121b,121b,121b,121 b,121b,121h,121
    b,121b,121b,121Wow. That's a good comeback. I'm sure it was said with the same conviction and straight-facedness of someone shouting "There's no such thing as ghosts!"
  • dirtydirty 93 Posts
    priceless. This thread made my day.
  • behemothbehemoth 2,189 Posts
    /font1
    Quote:/font1h,121b,121/font1Quote:/font1h,121b,121b,121"white people aren't racist"b,121b,121b,121b,121b,121 b,121b,121h,121
    b,121b,121b,121Wow. That's a good comeback. I'm sure it was said with the same conviction and straight-facedness of someone shouting "There's no such thing as ghosts!" b,121b,121h,121b,121b,121she meant every word of it.b,121b,121the funny thing is at first i was like "this lady is getting chewed out by a predominantly non-white subway car of people" then i thought b,121b,121"wait. this chicks nose is bleeding. this white lady won't shut up and she said white people aren't racist."b,121b,121history tells me that white people have always been the MOST racist
  • RerogRerog 569 Posts
    YES!
  • DB_CooperDB_Cooper Manhatin' 7,823 Posts
    /font1
    Quote:/font1h,121b,121 white people have always been the MOST racist b,121b,121h,121
    b,121b,121
  • pickwick33pickwick33 8,946 Posts
    /font1
    Quote:/font1h,121b,121yea but without my camera. i usually have it on me. in fact no one on the train had a thought to film it. because after it was all said and done people were like b,121b,121"who got that for Youtube?"b,121b,121and everyone is like "oh shit i forgot" b,121b,121h,121
    b,121b,121i hate to be a stick in the mud, but thats the bad part about youtubeb,121b,121what if you got in a public situation that was embarrassing...b,121b,121in the old days it would happen, and youd let it pass (assuming that you didnt know anybody who witnessed it and would never see them again)b,121b,121now, you risk the chance of seeing the whole thing survive thru the Net b,121b,121i aint down with that
  • drbrownscelraydrbrownscelray 648 Posts
    The train is a constant source of unparalleled theater. Once at Jay Street Borough Hall, this lady with 6 kids picked up the youngest kid by the arms, took his pants off and dangled him above the floor while he took a crap. When some of the passengers had the temerity to comment on this classy parenting choice, this lady got all "uhhh, he had to go to the bathroom, dont act like you aint never done that shit on the train before".b,121b,121When I lived in the Bronx and took the D or the 4 all the way uptown I saw some splendid shit on a daily basis.
  • behemothbehemoth 2,189 Posts
    /font1
    Quote:/font1h,121b,121/font1Quote:/font1h,121b,121yea but without my camera. i usually have it on me. in fact no one on the train had a thought to film it. because after it was all said and done people were like b,121b,121"who got that for Youtube?"b,121b,121and everyone is like "oh shit i forgot" b,121b,121h,121
    b,121b,121i hate to be a stick in the mud, but thats the bad part about youtubeb,121b,121what if you got in a public situation that was embarrassing...b,121b,121in the old days it would happen, and youd let it pass (assuming that you didnt know anybody who witnessed it and would never see them again)b,121b,121now, you risk the chance of seeing the whole thing survive thru the Net b,121b,121i aint down with that b,121b,121h,121b,121b,121yea but don't front like you would not watch it! i mean i would only post in on Soulstrut!
  • behemothbehemoth 2,189 Posts
    /font1
    Quote:/font1h,121b,121The train is a constant source of unparalleled theater. Once at Jay Street Borough Hall, this lady with 6 kids picked up the youngest kid by the arms, took his pants off and dangled him above the floor while he took a crap. When some of the passengers had the temerity to comment on this classy parenting choice, this lady got all "uhhh, he had to go to the bathroom, dont act like you aint never done that shit on the train before".b,121b,121When I lived in the Bronx and took the D or the 4 all the way uptown I saw some splendid shit on a daily basis. b,121b,121h,121
    b,121b,121you know the bum on the 4 that has HUGE hair and a deep voice? wears a potato sack and smells like the most awful dead thing ever? wears the sign around his neck?b,121b,121i saw him take a shit in the corner of a packed subway car once. and he just smiled!
  • drbrownscelraydrbrownscelray 648 Posts
    /font1
    Quote:/font1h,121b,121/font1Quote:/font1h,121b,121The train is a constant source of unparalleled theater. Once at Jay Street Borough Hall, this lady with 6 kids picked up the youngest kid by the arms, took his pants off and dangled him above the floor while he took a crap. When some of the passengers had the temerity to comment on this classy parenting choice, this lady got all "uhhh, he had to go to the bathroom, dont act like you aint never done that shit on the train before".b,121b,121When I lived in the Bronx and took the D or the 4 all the way uptown I saw some splendid shit on a daily basis. b,121b,121h,121
    b,121b,121you know the bum on the 4 that has HUGE hair and a deep voice? wears a potato sack and smells like the most awful dead thing ever? wears the sign around his neck?b,121b,121i saw him take a shit in the corner of a packed subway car once. and he just smiled! b,121b,121h,121b,121b,121Seriously, it takes ALOT to gross me out, but that dude's odor is F-UCKING BEYOND BEYOND. What bugs me out most is that I saw him out in Brighton Beach once. I thought I was hallucinating, but there are not two huge afroed bums with long toenails rocking burlap sacks, even in NYC.
  • kalakala 3,361 Posts
    i don't fuckk with the trains anymore unless it is totally unavoidableb,121i park in lots or walk or take the bus/cab/car serviceb,121fuckk all of that shitb,121ever feel like cattle packed in a box car at rush hour?b,121i'm not havein' it anymore and yup I am above that shitt and will gladly pay and be inconvienced/slowed down to stay above that shitb,121NEVER EVER AGAIN
  • selperfugeselperfuge 1,165 Posts
    one of the coolest examples of natural selection pressures mutating business pitches was that time a few years back when in the course of 2-3 weeks every kid on the train "selling candy raising money for my basketball team" turned into "i'm not going to lie, i don't play on any team, just making money, staying out of trouble".
  • behemothbehemoth 2,189 Posts
    /font1
    Quote:/font1h,121b,121/font1Quote:/font1h,121b,121/font1Quote:/font1h,121b,121The train is a constant source of unparalleled theater. Once at Jay Street Borough Hall, this lady with 6 kids picked up the youngest kid by the arms, took his pants off and dangled him above the floor while he took a crap. When some of the passengers had the temerity to comment on this classy parenting choice, this lady got all "uhhh, he had to go to the bathroom, dont act like you aint never done that shit on the train before".b,121b,121When I lived in the Bronx and took the D or the 4 all the way uptown I saw some splendid shit on a daily basis. b,121b,121h,121
    b,121b,121you know the bum on the 4 that has HUGE hair and a deep voice? wears a potato sack and smells like the most awful dead thing ever? wears the sign around his neck?b,121b,121i saw him take a shit in the corner of a packed subway car once. and he just smiled! b,121b,121h,121b,121b,121Seriously, it takes ALOT to gross me out, but that dude's odor is F-UCKING BEYOND BEYOND. What bugs me out most is that I saw him out in Brighton Beach once. I thought I was hallucinating, but there are not two huge afroed bums with long toenails rocking burlap sacks, even in NYC. b,121b,121h,121b,121b,121haha for real! dude has a baritone voice and every time i hear the door between the cars open and "excuse me!!" i take a deep breath and just hold that shit!b,121b,121as he passes people you see the look on their face like they're about to puke!
  • pickwick33pickwick33 8,946 Posts
    /font1
    Quote:/font1h,121b,121/font1Quote:/font1h,121b,121/font1Quote:/font1h,121b,121yea but without my camera. i usually have it on me. in fact no one on the train had a thought to film it. because after it was all said and done people were like b,121b,121"who got that for Youtube?"b,121b,121and everyone is like "oh shit i forgot" b,121b,121h,121
    b,121b,121i hate to be a stick in the mud, but thats the bad part about youtubeb,121b,121what if you got in a public situation that was embarrassing...b,121b,121in the old days it would happen, and youd let it pass (assuming that you didnt know anybody who witnessed it and would never see them again)b,121b,121now, you risk the chance of seeing the whole thing survive thru the Net b,121b,121i aint down with that b,121b,121h,121b,121b,121yea but don't front like you would not watch it! i mean i would only post in on Soulstrut! b,121b,121h,121b,121b,121oh hell yes id watch it! if it were somebody ELSE...b,121b,121but its one thing if it was just some street corner exhibitionist or subway crazy. what if it was YOURSELF on display, just goin about yr business? you step on a banana peel and you fall down on the ground...you think its over till the next day when your pratfall is the toast of the Internet... (privacy issues-related)
  • bassiebassie 11,710 Posts
    /font1
    Quote:/font1h,121b,121/font1Quote:/font1h,121b,121yea but without my camera. i usually have it on me. in fact no one on the train had a thought to film it. because after it was all said and done people were like b,121b,121"who got that for Youtube?"b,121b,121and everyone is like "oh shit i forgot" b,121b,121h,121
    b,121b,121i hate to be a stick in the mud, but thats the bad part about youtubeb,121b,121what if you got in a public situation that was embarrassing...b,121b,121in the old days it would happen, and youd let it pass (assuming that you didnt know anybody who witnessed it and would never see them again)b,121b,121now, you risk the chance of seeing the whole thing survive thru the Net b,121b,121i aint down with that b,121b,121h,121b,121b,121or that instead of helping to calm it down or help someone, folks might be too busy making sure they got it on tape.b,121b,121I think the white lady is living in the wrong city if she's not really feeling the different peoples of the world thing.
  • The_NonThe_Non 5,691 Posts
    /font1
    Quote:/font1h,121b,121i don't fuckk with the trains anymore unless it is totally unavoidableb,121i park in lots or walk or take the bus/cab/car serviceb,121fuckk all of that shitb,121ever feel like cattle packed in a box car at rush hour?b,121i'm not havein' it anymore and yup I am above that shitt and will gladly pay and be inconvienced/slowed down to stay above that shitb,121NEVER EVER AGAIN b,121b,121h,121
    b,121b,121I smell an episode of "Kala In The Country" brewing. Come upstate, F*ck all that noise.
  • The-gafflerThe-gaffler 2,190 Posts
    i love the 4! that's where i always see Lord Finesse's short ass. i always think about that, who was it, K-Solo(?) song when i go by Tracy Towers.
  • behemothbehemoth 2,189 Posts
    /font1
    Quote:/font1h,121b,121i love the 4! that's where i always see Lord Finesse's short ass. i always think about that, who was it, K-Solo(?) song when i go by Tracy Towers. b,121b,121h,121
    b,121b,121the train ride gets longer and longer every day. work has me drained i guess.b,121b,121oh. and far as people not helping. the situation was diffused when it became violent. i look at the cake face shit as a taste attack though!
  • The-gafflerThe-gaffler 2,190 Posts
    /font1
    Quote:/font1h,121b,121/font1Quote:/font1h,121b,121i love the 4! that's where i always see Lord Finesse's short ass. i always think about that, who was it, K-Solo(?) song when i go by Tracy Towers. b,121b,121h,121
    b,121b,121the train ride gets longer and longer every day. work has me drained i guess.b,121b,121oh. and far as people not helping. the situation was diffused when it became violent. i look at the cake face shit as a taste attack though! b,121b,121h,121b,121b,121b,121you still livin all the way out in bumble-fusk? maaaaane move to woodlawn or something.
  • behemothbehemoth 2,189 Posts
    nah i am in Kingsbridge. right by the Bedford Park station now.b,121b,121still takes too long though.
  • The-gafflerThe-gaffler 2,190 Posts
    ohhh word, dope!
  • Birdman9Birdman9 5,417 Posts
    /font1
    Quote:/font1h,121b,121/font1Quote:/font1h,121b,121yea but without my camera. i usually have it on me. in fact no one on the train had a thought to film it. because after it was all said and done people were like b,121b,121"who got that for Youtube?"b,121b,121and everyone is like "oh shit i forgot" b,121b,121h,121
    b,121b,121i hate to be a stick in the mud, but thats the bad part about youtubeb,121b,121what if you got in a public situation that was embarrassing...b,121b,121in the old days it would happen, and youd let it pass (assuming that you didnt know anybody who witnessed it and would never see them again)b,121b,121now, you risk the chance of seeing the whole thing survive thru the Net b,121b,121i aint down with that b,121b,121h,121b,121b,121Seriously. Even this 'Joe the Plumber' shit had me thinking how everyone in America with wikipedia will know about any and all arrests/divorces/firings/salary/embarrassing facts within about a 48-hour period. And why? Because he was caught on tape asking a politician a question, and then made a mythical figure in a debate. And for the rest of his life, he will make the news if anything remotely weird embarrassing happens to him. Kinda f*cking scary if you ask me.
  • OkemOkem 4,617 Posts
    Hello Class.b,121b,121b,121This is Spain.b,121b,121 b,121b,121It's part of Europe. (Where white people are from.) b,121b,121Span??ish / Pronunciation Key - [span-ish] b,121b,121???adjectiveb,1211. of or pertaining to Spain, its people, or their language.b,121???nounb,1212. the Spanish people collectively. b,121b,121b,121Although many countries in Central and South America speak Spanish, their people are not. Cause they're not from f*cking Spain.
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