Locked Out Of The House Unappreciation Thread.
Hotsauce84
8,450 Posts
If you ever decide to shake out your shoeshine rag on the patio at midnight, I strongly suggest that you either a) unlock the front door first, b) keep your keys in your pocket or c) make sure that the foot you intended to keep partially in the house to stop the door from closing is actually IN the house and not an 1/8th of inch OUTSIDE of the house.b,121b,121It is probably a good idea to have a pair of slippers or shoes on and maybe you shouldn't leave your cellphone charging in the bedroom either. Also, super duper "ain't NOBODY breaking in my house again" window locks are usually not your best friend at this point. Sleep pants are, though. A Mexican in boxers after midnight = instant deportation. Thank God for my foresight.b,121b,121Just some friendly words of advice from your Uncle Herm, who now has pebbles and desert stickers embedded in his feet and a broken bedroom window that whistles gentle tee-hee's and whispers of "dumb ass" when the Arizona breeze blows through it.b,121b,121Goodnight and sleep well, my pretties.
Comments