WHO HERE HAS HAD A DICK PULLED ON THEM?
picoandsepulveda
1,026 Posts
kickin' it up in the bay area with my cousins. end up ha'nging with this chick thru the weekend and we decide to go to baker beach in sf. were walking along the path to the beach and some dude pops up from behind some bushes with his joint out and he's going at it looking dead at me and this chick. he asks us if we'd like to join in we politely decline and go own our way.
Comments
ha!
king allmoist said he apologized for scaring you like that... hes a little forward sometimes...
lanyards, basketball, christian baby blood drinking, trips to the park, and baking cookies
I call bullshit!!
No way they would have ovens at a Jewish Summer Camp!!
peace.
what is a circle jerk? just a bunch of guys jacking off? is that illegal in the US?
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so guzzo called the police and they came over to make some people stop jerking off? How[/b]? why? what for? what would the charge be? Public nuisance?
being a police officer must be horrible. demobilizing jerk circles...
My neighbour on the floor above me was similar to this. Whenever we had people round getting drunk he'd drink alone in his apartment then wander downstairs in a skirt before whipping his johnson out and parading around naked for an hour or two. After the initial hooha each time by the uninitiated guests people quickly got bored as, although he had a mighty member, god balanced the playing field by bestowing on him one of the most boring and tedious personalities I've ever come across.
me and the homies are on tour and have a night off in Philly so we decide to stroll down by the waterfron and to some drinks and play some games at Dave and Busters. so I'm about 2 Saphire and Tonics deep and completely kicking ass at Skeeball when I hear a loud "What?!!!" in a very agressive tone. I turn around right in time to see, no less than three feet in front of me, A very large dude grab his girl by the back of the head and slam her face down into one of those hockey games with the bubble, crashing her through the hard plastice bubble and leaving her knocked out with her head resting through the game. Dude is huffing and puffing like a bull and proceeds to slowly strip out of his sweatsuit while keeping an eye on the growing audience. Completely naked, he just stands there and stares everyone down and the jackass behind me goes "Oh my god, this is a family establishment!" Well, long story short, it took 5 cops to subdue and arrest him. i don't know what happened to the girl but dude was naked when they escorted him into the back hallway.
yes, it is illegal to masturbate at a public beach in the u.s. why would this be so surprising? and a counselor called the cops. because there were kids there at the beach. and dudes were playing with their damn cocks at the public beach with the kids nearby. are you still confused?
I guess I saw my first dick when I was 6 and playing in my friend's backyard, I went around the corner to get the ball or something and there was a dude dressed like a jogger working on his dingaling. I went and told my friend's mom that some man was "peeing" behind the garbage cans. The po-po showed up shortly after.
My best friend and I were accosted by some man with his johnson out in front of the donut shop near our house a couple times, it was pretty funny actually. Penises, for the most part, are funny!
Oh, and I remember taking my pitbull to the dog park a few times by myself and seeing a man in the bushes working on something in his pants- girl walking pitbull fetish? ew. Seems like a dangerous activity if said dog is well-trained.
men are gross!
One of the stores i worked in had a darkroom upstairs, i had to play the pron for the big screens from the VCRs downstairs behind the counter, so im chilling out, fucking baked after my break and i forget to rewind the movies for the dudes, (its around 3am)
so i hear mad banging and crashing as someone is coming down the stairs, i grab the baseball bat and walk around to head whoever is coming down the stairs off (maybe head off isnt the best expression...) anyways, door busts open and there is one of the regulars, buttass naked, with a hardon, sweating, wheezing, panting, stinking of Amyl and he says "um, puffantwheeze, can you puffpantwheeze rewind the movie puffpantwheeze?"
saw mad dick in that job.
It's been a while since you told a shop story. IMO you should drop these every couple of weeks
-Your Israeli AK victim brother in arms
Mop-y Dick
ok... i see. i thought some kids were jerking off... and some other kids called the police. never mind. you guys are taking this thread seriuos...
bro, once you start with the ayos, itll never stop, jesus that place was insane.
whatsup Guzzo, yeah, i should drop these pron gems more regularlike, heres a quickie: (ayo1)
we used to sell those penispumps that supposedly make your dick bigger, for the uninitiated in the house, they are basically a perspex tube that you slide your johnson in and at the other end is a pump that sucks the wee-fella full of blood and, well, you get the picture, anyways, dudes with small dicks used to come in and buy these things all the time, classic shit, one guy, we called him 'bollywood' was this thirtysomething indian dude who fanied himself as a bollywood hero, he had the whole look from head to toe. Greasy hair, silk Versace, gold chains, manicured nails, the works.
Anyways dude must have had such a complex about his small dick because he would buy the whole range of these fucking tubes, all the attachments, hell he even used to hang weights of his cock (I know because I sold them to him).
Anyways, dude comes in all stoked one night and just whips it out and stands there looking at me,:
???bro what are you doing, I don???t need to see your cock???
???yes, but look!???
???dude, put it away or im throwing you out???
???yes, sorry, but look!???
???bro, what the fuck????
???my penis??? it is HUUUUUUUUGE!???
turns out little man had discovered Viagra and was enjoying his 3rd day straight erection. I couldn???t help but laugh when I realized how happy he was, all that money he had spent on pumps, weights and god-knows-what-else and all it took was a wee little pill to make him happy.
That weekend he blew over AU$2000 on hookers.
And I bet he did it all to a kickass bollywood soundtrack.
Hmm..naked dude needing 5 cops to restrain him, sounds like he was dusted to me.