I spent some time traveling around Europe in college while I did study abroad. I would usually go places on my own. At first I felt really lame, but really, once I stopped giving a shit about other peoples perceptions of me it was kind of nice. I could do what I wanted and I would usually end up hanging out with locals and getting a better feel for whatever city I was in.
I agree with this; I've spent a lot of time by myself in other cities, and once you stop caring about what other people think, it's really easy to go out to bars by yourself (note, I said bars, not clubs - that's weird) and also to go to dinner solo (although when places had a bar to eat at, that's a lot better than a table... either way, bring a book). However, it's completely different going out by yourself in your own city - I don't do that all that much (except to go get a pint at my local).
Only one time I ever went to the cinema alone I wanted to see a film that none of my friends were into seeing so I thought fuck it I'll go alone . Felt weird when I got there, all the couples & groups having fun around me, then someone called my name, it was the most unpopular, uncool guy in my school year, not a bad dude but he used to regularly shit himself in class n stuff. I realised that he too was there on his own & no doubt did this all the time. That was 15 years ago & I've never been to see a film alone since
Only one time I ever went to the cinema alone I wanted to see a film that none of my friends were into seeing so I thought fuck it I'll go alone . Felt weird when I got there, all the couples & groups having fun around me, then someone called my name, it was the most unpopular, uncool guy in my school year, not a bad dude but he used to regularly shit himself in class n stuff[/b]. I realised that he too was there on his own & no doubt did this all the time. That was 15 years ago & I've never been to see a film alone since
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You could be the coolest M.F. on the block, but regularly crapping your pants kills your reputation.
I have no qualms about going the movies by myself (I think the last flick I saw solo was Collateral; it was a similar situation as last night: weeknight, feeling ansty, no one else around). I also wouldn't think twice about grabbing a bite to eat then maybe a drink at the bar with a book, that is if I was out of town or something.
Last night, I eased my pain with a beer, a little smoke and 24 Hour Party People. That movie is hilarious.
Going to the bar alone is cool. Drunk people are entertaining and you could have a good time. Now going to the movies alone is something I can't do. I feel weird solo in the theatre.
bar=yes movies=no
Co-sign, going alone to the movies make you look like a serial killer or a child molester. Just don't.
i heard randy johnson (the pitcher) being interviewed on the radio once. he said, if you're a real man, you can go see a movie by yourself. why that was brought up in his interview, i have no clue but for some reason that always stuck with me.
i travel for work every few weeks, and if i don't go out alone, i start going crazy. i can't watch TV for very long, and sometimes the solo movie thing gets tired... where do you live, man? in new york, you can meet people anywhere... subway, bar, zabar's, whatever. anaheim, and dallas are a little harder. now that i live with my girl, i try to make sure i have a bit of extra time to myself, just to keep from feeling claustrophobic. i'm an only child though, and didn't grow up in a house with a bunch of folks.
i live with my man, i try to make sure i have a bit of extra time to myself
I relate to this.
Also, when I was younger, it took a while to find folks who liked the same things as me, so I did a lot of things on my own and I have not stopped.
Some people cannot be alone with themselves, not sure if this is a good thing.
I have noticed a change in attitude over time, the weird vibe from staff/patrons for eating alone is not as prevalent.
As long as you???re not sinking into a dperessive pit, I think going drinking alone is no thing at all.
I hated when I was a freshman in college and people would feel like they had to come sit with me when I was eating by myself in the cafeteria. Or they would get pissed if I didn???t come sit with them. I would much rather read the paper than make stupid small talk through a meal. That said the only person I actually enjoy eating with on a regular basis is my fianc??, and that???s because if we don???t have anything to say we don???t feel like we need to force it.
i live with my man, i try to make sure i have a bit of extra time to myself
I relate to this.
Also, when I was younger, it took a while to find folks who liked the same things as me, so I did a lot of things on my own and I have not stopped.
Some people cannot be alone with themselves, not sure if this is a good thing.
I have noticed a change in attitude over time, the weird vibe from staff/patrons for eating alone is not as prevalent.
As long as you???re not sinking into a depressive pit, I think going drinking alone is no thing at all.
Yeah, I agree. I also think it has a lot to do with your upbringing. I spent my pre-teens as an only child with my father working to get the family business off the ground and my mother working a seperate day job to help bring in finances -- so monday thru friday I was rollin' for self at the daycare. I really had to learn how to entertain myself without relying on others early on. Thankfully, I had my art, so the more time to myself the better.
But being able to be self-contained is a quality that has stuck with me ever since. I've never had trouble making friends and although I do enjoy quality company, I still like doing a lot of activities for dolo.
On the opposite end of the spectrum, I also know people who can't do anything on their own, and I feel for them. I can't imagine what it's like to be so dependent on other people that you wouldn't go do something on your own. I'm not suggesting a candle-lit dinner for one, but grabbing a beer or seeing a movie? Go for it...
On the opposite end of the spectrum, I also know people who can't do anything on their own, and I feel for them.
my next door neighbor is like this. not only can she not do anything alone, but she can't be alone, so she's over at my place all the time expecting to be entertained or something. it's an annoying/kind of sad quality for a person to have. on the positive note, the neighbor's kind of cute and shes a party animal.
On the opposite end of the spectrum, I also know people who can't do anything on their own, and I feel for them.
my next door neighbor is like this. not only can she not do anything alone, but she can't be alone, so she's over at my place all the time expecting to be entertained or something. it's an annoying/kind of sad quality for a person to have. on the positive note, the neighbor's kind of cute and shes a party animal.
A cute, party-animal woman neighbor would have hit the spot last night.
On the opposite end of the spectrum, I also know people who can't do anything on their own, and I feel for them.
my next door neighbor is like this. not only can she not do anything alone, but she can't be alone, so she's over at my place all the time expecting to be entertained or something. it's an annoying/kind of sad quality for a person to have. on the positive note, the neighbor's kind of cute and shes a party animal.
A cute, party-animal woman neighbor would have hit the spot last night.
yeah, but to take it back to the topic, sometimes you need an introspective evening sitting at a bar alone, smoking and drinking, and thinking somewhere in the back of your mind, "i wonder if i look more like bogart in the big sleep or christian slater in true love right now..."
I have no problem, going to see a movie by myself. I used to hit the movies every Fri before one of my DJ gigs. Had the 2 hours or so to spare, so why not?
There are some guidelines though.
You can't go see some side splitting comedy IMO, you look like a freak laughing out loud by yourself.
Most of my friends in life never had the same tastes as me in music,movies,etc. I finally had enough, and declared that I wasn't gonna miss out on life because there was nobody to share things with. I am a latchkey kid at heart,and have learned to be bymself anyway.
Have plenty of cool experiences from going to concerts, and random things. No worries.
Bars are cool w/ a good book. Why feel uncomfortable in that situation?
You can sometimes meet some cool peeps out of a strangers curiosity of what you are doing...
Going to the bar alone is cool. Drunk people are entertaining and you could have a good time. Now going to the movies alone is something I can't do. I feel weird solo in the theatre.
bar=yes movies=no
Co-sign, going alone to the movies make you look like a serial killer or a child molester. Just don't.
yeah, b/c staring at the screen in the dark in complete silence is a real social event...
i probably go to the movies solo more often than with someone... i never knew this was considered "weird" before i read this thread... going to shows solo is only bad if there's lots of time between bands and then you have to sit there bored...
i actually roll solo to lots of things and it doesn't really bother me... i don't really go to bars alone, to go back to the root of the thread... only if i know the bartender or something... if i'm gonna drink alone, i'll do it home where i don't have to deal with any people!
i completely embrace and enjoy me time. i like being alone. im probably the one with the problem. people annoy me.
I'm the same way. I mean, I hang out with friends a fair amount and I'm not totally antisocial, but if I don't have at least a while each day to myself to just decompress I don't feel right. It's especially noticeable when I'm out of town staying with a friend or something. After a week of not being in my own comfortable space and *constantly* being around somebody I'm just ready to get home and lay around in my underwear doing nothing. It's this kind of feeling that makes me wonder if I could ever get married because damned if I could be around somebody all the damn time without going a little crazy.
i feel the same way, i doubt i will get married and latley have been getting adjusted to this thought. i have friends that i hang with at least once or twice a week, and iam around people all day at work, thats about all the social interaction i really want. If i don't have one day on the weekend to be alone and do what i want to do, which is usually gettin high and eating tacos than iam a bitch the next week, to everyone. i know when folks are married they dont have to be around each other all the time but i think its more of haveing to answer to someone that bothers me.
i have an ex who i hang with when "the mood" hits me and i think that makes it worse, i really don't want new or more friends but if i wasn't gettin booty i would be more likely to be out and about trying to work on a social life, not to mention work out and lose some weight and get a haircut
i really don't want new or more friends but if i wasn't gettin booty i would be more likely to be out and about trying to work on a social life, not to mention work out and lose some weight and get a haircut
I have no problem, going to see a movie by myself. I used to hit the movies every Fri before one of my DJ gigs. Had the 2 hours or so to spare, so why not?
There are some guidelines though.
You can't go see some side splitting comedy IMO, you look like a freak laughing out loud by yourself.
Most of my friends in life never had the same tastes as me in music,movies,etc. I finally had enough, and declared that I wasn't gonna miss out on life because there was nobody to share things with. I am a latchkey kid at heart,and have learned to be bymself anyway.
Have plenty of cool experiences from going to concerts, and random things. No worries.
Bars are cool w/ a good book. Why feel uncomfortable in that situation?
You can sometimes meet some cool peeps out of a strangers curiosity of what you are doing...
Exactly. Forget all this "No Movies Alone" talk. Last year I lived two blocks away from a second-run movie theater that serves beer. I was there by myself at least once a week having some beer and popcorn and watching a $3 film. It never once felt weird to me and it was a convinient way to get out of the house for a little bit. Some of y'all could learn to be alone a little more I think. I sometimes even prefer to discover new bars, restaurants, etc. alone, rather than with a group of people. But like MT said, I'm also a latchkey kid at heart. I'm more comfortable fending for myself.
i completely embrace and enjoy me time. i like being alone. im probably the one with the problem. people annoy me.
I'm the same way. I mean, I hang out with friends a fair amount and I'm not totally antisocial, but if I don't have at least a while each day to myself to just decompress I don't feel right. It's especially noticeable when I'm out of town staying with a friend or something. After a week of not being in my own comfortable space and *constantly* being around somebody I'm just ready to get home and lay around in my underwear doing nothing. It's this kind of feeling that makes me wonder if I could ever get married because damned if I could be around somebody all the damn time without going a little crazy.
i feel the same way, i doubt i will get married and latley have been getting adjusted to this thought. i have friends that i hang with at least once or twice a week, and iam around people all day at work, thats about all the social interaction i really want. If i don't have one day on the weekend to be alone and do what i want to do, which is usually gettin high and eating tacos than iam a bitch the next week, to everyone. i know when folks are married they dont have to be around each other all the time but i think its more of haveing to answer to someone that bothers me.
i have an ex who i hang with when "the mood" hits me and i think that makes it worse, i really don't want new or more friends but if i wasn't gettin booty i would be more likely to be out and about trying to work on a social life, not to mention work out and lose some weight and get a haircut
i believe that is the longest thread i have ever seen you write...
i think a lot of people on here enjoy doing things solo, otherwise they wouldn't be on soulstrut!
Comments
Nope, it is
I agree with this; I've spent a lot of time by myself in other cities, and once you stop caring about what other people think, it's really easy to go out to bars by yourself (note, I said bars, not clubs - that's weird) and also to go to dinner solo (although when places had a bar to eat at, that's a lot better than a table... either way, bring a book). However, it's completely different going out by yourself in your own city - I don't do that all that much (except to go get a pint at my local).
.
You could be the coolest M.F. on the block, but regularly crapping your pants kills your reputation.
I have no qualms about going the movies by myself (I think the last flick I saw solo was Collateral; it was a similar situation as last night: weeknight, feeling ansty, no one else around). I also wouldn't think twice about grabbing a bite to eat then maybe a drink at the bar with a book, that is if I was out of town or something.
Last night, I eased my pain with a beer, a little smoke and 24 Hour Party People. That movie is hilarious.
i heard randy johnson (the pitcher) being interviewed on the radio once. he said, if you're a real man, you can go see a movie by yourself.
why that was brought up in his interview, i have no clue but for some reason that always stuck with me.
I relate to this.
Also, when I was younger, it took a while to find folks who liked the same things as me, so I did a lot of things on my own and I have not stopped.
Some people cannot be alone with themselves, not sure if this is a good thing.
I have noticed a change in attitude over time, the weird vibe from staff/patrons for eating alone is not as prevalent.
As long as you???re not sinking into a depressive pit, I think going drinking alone is no thing at all.
I hated when I was a freshman in college and people would feel like they had to come sit with me when I was eating by myself in the cafeteria. Or they would get pissed if I didn???t come sit with them. I would much rather read the paper than make stupid small talk through a meal. That said the only person I actually enjoy eating with on a regular basis is my fianc??, and that???s because if we don???t have anything to say we don???t feel like we need to force it.
Yeah, I agree. I also think it has a lot to do with your upbringing. I spent my pre-teens as an only child with my father working to get the family business off the ground and my mother working a seperate day job to help bring in finances -- so monday thru friday I was rollin' for self at the daycare. I really had to learn how to entertain myself without relying on others early on. Thankfully, I had my art, so the more time to myself the better.
But being able to be self-contained is a quality that has stuck with me ever since. I've never had trouble making friends and although I do enjoy quality company, I still like doing a lot of activities for dolo.
On the opposite end of the spectrum, I also know people who can't do anything on their own, and I feel for them. I can't imagine what it's like to be so dependent on other people that you wouldn't go do something on your own. I'm not suggesting a candle-lit dinner for one, but grabbing a beer or seeing a movie? Go for it...
...you have a bigger birthday party on soulstrut, than you do in real life.
my next door neighbor is like this. not only can she not do anything alone, but she can't be alone, so she's over at my place all the time expecting to be entertained or something. it's an annoying/kind of sad quality for a person to have.
on the positive note, the neighbor's kind of cute and shes a party animal.
Nice!
A cute, party-animal woman neighbor would have hit the spot last night.
yeah, but to take it back to the topic, sometimes you need an introspective evening sitting at a bar alone, smoking and drinking, and thinking somewhere in the back of your mind, "i wonder if i look more like bogart in the big sleep or christian slater in true love right now..."
I used to hit the movies every Fri before one of my DJ gigs.
Had the 2 hours or so to spare, so why not?
There are some guidelines though.
You can't go see some side splitting comedy IMO, you look like a freak laughing out loud by yourself.
Most of my friends in life never had the same tastes as me in music,movies,etc. I finally had enough, and declared that I wasn't gonna miss out on life because there was nobody to share things with. I am a latchkey kid at heart,and have learned to be bymself anyway.
Have plenty of cool experiences from going to concerts, and random things. No worries.
Bars are cool w/ a good book. Why feel uncomfortable in that situation?
You can sometimes meet some cool peeps out of a strangers curiosity of what you are doing...
yeah, b/c staring at the screen in the dark in complete silence is a real social event...
i probably go to the movies solo more often than with someone... i never knew this was considered "weird" before i read this thread... going to shows solo is only bad if there's lots of time between bands and then you have to sit there bored...
i actually roll solo to lots of things and it doesn't really bother me... i don't really go to bars alone, to go back to the root of the thread... only if i know the bartender or something... if i'm gonna drink alone, i'll do it home where i don't have to deal with any people!
i am about to go ice skating.... ALONE!
i feel the same way, i doubt i will get married and latley have been getting adjusted to this thought. i have friends that i hang with at least once or twice a week, and iam around people all day at work, thats about all the social interaction i really want. If i don't have one day on the weekend to be alone and do what i want to do, which is usually gettin high and eating tacos than iam a bitch the next week, to everyone. i know when folks are married they dont have to be around each other all the time but i think its more of haveing to answer to someone that bothers me.
i have an ex who i hang with when "the mood" hits me and i think that makes it worse, i really don't want new or more friends but if i wasn't gettin booty i would be more likely to be out and about trying to work on a social life, not to mention work out and lose some weight and get a haircut
Amen.
Exactly. Forget all this "No Movies Alone" talk. Last year I lived two blocks away from a second-run movie theater that serves beer. I was there by myself at least once a week having some beer and popcorn and watching a $3 film. It never once felt weird to me and it was a convinient way to get out of the house for a little bit. Some of y'all could learn to be alone a little more I think. I sometimes even prefer to discover new bars, restaurants, etc. alone, rather than with a group of people. But like MT said, I'm also a latchkey kid at heart. I'm more comfortable fending for myself.
i believe that is the longest thread i have ever seen you write...
i think a lot of people on here enjoy doing things solo, otherwise they wouldn't be on soulstrut!