Dear Person Next to Me on the Phone,

edith headedith head 5,106 Posts
edited January 2006 in Strut Central
Yes, I notice you and notice you have a personal life. I also notice that you talk louder and longer when your phone calls are personal and you know what? It's not working. I don't care about your personal life and don't think you are interesting or witty. I doubt neither one of our cube neighbors think you are either. Your laugh sucks. I don't care that you saw a blues band last nite and had the best martini. I don't care that you watched Frontline last nite. I don't care about how appalled you were at Betsy's outfit on Saturday. You are boring and I can't wait to move cubes on Friday cause headphones just aren't doing the trick anymore

Audrey
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  Comments


  • drewnicedrewnice 5,465 Posts
    Hey A****y,

    As an aside, any updated on what happened to your co-worker who would talk to everyone else but you, and many a Strutter suspected may be into you?

  • SoulOnIceSoulOnIce 13,027 Posts
    LOL

    Maybe that particular person she talks to is heard of hearing?

  • HAZHAZ 3,376 Posts


    As an aside, any updated on what happened to your co-worker who would talk to everyone else but you, and many a Strutter suspected may be into you?

    Yeah, that was a weird story.

    If I had to choose my favorite Ms. Damn story, it would be the one about the chrome pidgeon. That one still boggles my mind.

  • Big_StacksBig_Stacks "I don't worry about hittin' power, cause I don't give 'em nuttin' to hit." 4,670 Posts
    Yes, I notice you and notice you have a personal life. I also notice that you talk louder and longer when your phone calls are personal and you know what? It's not working. I don't care about your personal life and don't think you are interesting or witty. I doubt neither one of our cube neighbors think you are either. Your laugh sucks. I don't care that you saw a blues band last nite and had the best martini. I don't care that you watched Frontline last nite. I don't care about how appalled you were at Betsy's outfit on Saturday. You are boring and I can't wait to move cubes on Friday cause headphones just aren't doing the trick anymore

    Audrey

    Hey Ms. D.,

    You could always say, "Uh um, excuse me, could you kindly stop talking so muthafuckin' loud. Thank you."

    Peace,

    Big Stacks from Kakalak

  • Yes, I notice you and notice you have a personal life. I also notice that you talk louder and longer when your phone calls are personal and you know what? It's not working. I don't care about your personal life and don't think you are interesting or witty. I doubt neither one of our cube neighbors think you are either. Your laugh sucks. I don't care that you saw a blues band last nite and had the best martini. I don't care that you watched Frontline last nite. I don't care about how appalled you were at Betsy's outfit on Saturday. You are boring and I can't wait to move cubes on Friday cause headphones just aren't doing the trick anymore

    Thanks a lot A*drey. You might not be interested in their personal life, but now WE ARE. Daily updates from now on plaese.

    PS I'm now taking bets on if they go to Ruby Tuesday's or Chili's this weekend. Still working on the odds on whether they rent WEDDING CRASHERS or THE TRANSPORTER 2 on Friday night. "Miller High Life or Michelob" betting is now closed.

  • edith headedith head 5,106 Posts

    Hey Ms. D.,

    You could always say, "Uh um, excuse me, could you kindly stop talking so muthafuckin' loud. Thank you."

    this person is very sensitivo and would be crushed. plus, i'd rather superglue the handset to the base like tim did on The Office

    no one would ever know, unless one you guys rat on me


  • mandrewmandrew 2,720 Posts
    superglue the handset to the base like tim did on The Office


    DO IT

  • SupergoodSupergood 1,213 Posts
    Yes, I notice you and notice you have a personal life. I also notice that you talk louder and longer when your phone calls are personal and you know what? It's not working. I don't care about your personal life and don't think you are interesting or witty. I doubt neither one of our cube neighbors think you are either. Your laugh sucks. I don't care that you saw a blues band last nite and had the best martini. I don't care that you watched Frontline last nite. I don't care about how appalled you were at Betsy's outfit on Saturday. You are boring and I can't wait to move cubes on Friday cause headphones just aren't doing the trick anymore

    Audrey


    Wow...change a few words in your post here and there, and you've described my current cube situation to a T.

    SG

  • mylatencymylatency 10,475 Posts
    superglue the handset to the base like tim did on The Office


    DO IT


  • edith headedith head 5,106 Posts

    Thanks a lot A*drey. You might not be interested in their personal life, but now WE ARE. Daily updates from now on plaese.

    i won't have any updates after i move cubes this friday. THANK GOD

    but seriously, don't we all know someone like this? people who want you to hear their conversation?? i don't understand that. when i'm at work or on the bus and my phone rings, i use the quiet voice cause the environment is kinda inhibiting. especially work, i don't want to hear that you thought so and so was flirting with ya or it took you 3 hours to finish your laundry. boring vapid chatter

  • edith headedith head 5,106 Posts
    Hey A****y,



    As an aside, any updated on what happened to your co-worker who would talk to everyone else but you, and many a Strutter suspected may be into you?



    i gave her the death ray look when she didn't look like she was going to move out of my way when we were walking towards each other and since that, we avoid each other now. isn't it just common courtesy that both people move a little when you walk towards each other? well i moved a little and still didn't get enough room to pass by, so i just kept walking and staring her dead in the eye until she was like 3 feet in front of me and then she did this twisty hip thing last minute and got outta my way. ridiculous girl





    sidenote, i guess you guys can tell that i do not try to make friends with any of my coworkers

  • RockadelicRockadelic Out Digging 13,993 Posts
    Growing up in NYC I saw plenty of crazy people walking down the street talking out loud to themselves...

    Now with all these ear piece and head set phones I can't tell who's crazy any more!!!

    I hope I'm never important(or self-important) enough to have to be hooked to a phone 24/7

  • SoulOnIceSoulOnIce 13,027 Posts
    the death ray look



    presumably the opposite of




  • I want to slap folks who dig out their loud-ass phones and stare at the ID for ten seconds while the phone is busy chirping out some jock jam or whatever. grow up and put that shit on vibrate!


    on-the-low cell skills are

  • mandrewmandrew 2,720 Posts
    superglue the handset to the base like tim did on The Office


    DO IT


    google image search for 'do it' top left image, so weird, kind of funny, not at all sfw


  • when i'm at work or on the bus and my phone rings, i use the quiet voice cause the environment is kinda inhibiting.

    but then you always get "why are you talking so weird?" from the person you're on the phone with.





  • sidenote, i guess you guys can tell that i do not try to make friends with any of my coworkers



    This is a policy I try to strictly adhere to. This one dude at my job who is a "rapper" keeps telling me he wants to bring a sampler over to my house to make beats from my records. I told him he should buy a record player and I will sell him some bob james raer for cheap.





    Touchdown!!!!!!!!!!!!!




  • SoulOnIceSoulOnIce 13,027 Posts
    bob james rear

    I finally understand what "I just threw up a little in my mouth" means!

  • p_gunnp_gunn 2,284 Posts


    but seriously, don't we all know someone like this? people who want you to hear their conversation?? i don't understand that. when i'm at work or on the bus and my phone rings, i use the quiet voice cause the environment is kinda inhibiting. especially work, i don't want to hear that you thought so and so was flirting with ya or it took you 3 hours to finish your laundry. boring vapid chatter

    that's a pet peeve of mine. i HATE for anyone to hear my business, no matter how innocent or mundane. if the phone rings and i'm line at the post office or something, i won't pick it up...

  • mordecaimordecai 2,204 Posts
    twisty hip thing
    up until this part, she didn't sound like my type.

  • DORDOR Two Ron Toe 9,903 Posts
    For some odd reason reading this made me think of Office Space. When Peter looks over the cubicle wall and asks Milton to turn the radio down.




    "I was told that I could listen to the radio at a reasonable volume from nine to eleven, I told bill that if Sandra is going to listen to her headphones while she's filing then I should be able to listen to the radio while I'm collating so I don't see why I should have to turn down the radio because I enjoy listening at a reasonable volume from nine to eleven."

  • mylatencymylatency 10,475 Posts
    boring vapid chatter



    <=== THANK YOU

  • p_gunnp_gunn 2,284 Posts
    Growing up in NYC I saw plenty of crazy people walking down the street talking out loud to themselves...

    Now with all these ear piece and head set phones I can't tell who's crazy any more!!!

    I hope I'm never important(or self-important) enough to have to be hooked to a phone 24/7

    i first saw those tiny ear piece things in london in 99... my move (when drunk) when i saw a businessman huffing down the street while talking was to yell "HEY LOOK AT THAT CRAZY BUM TALKING TO HIMSELF!!!!"



















    i found it funny...


  • Big_StacksBig_Stacks "I don't worry about hittin' power, cause I don't give 'em nuttin' to hit." 4,670 Posts


    but seriously, don't we all know someone like this? people who want you to hear their conversation?? i don't understand that. when i'm at work or on the bus and my phone rings, i use the quiet voice cause the environment is kinda inhibiting. especially work, i don't want to hear that you thought so and so was flirting with ya or it took you 3 hours to finish your laundry. boring vapid chatter

    that's a pet peeve of mine. i HATE for anyone to hear my business, no matter how innocent or mundane. if the phone rings and i'm line at the post office or something, i won't pick it up... [/b]

    Peace,

    Big Stacks from Kakalak

  • edith headedith head 5,106 Posts

    EXCELLENT

    OHMIGOD

    that would be a great cover for an album called BALLS IN PARADISE

    'dropping' in summer of 06
    heads aint redee

  • SoulOnIceSoulOnIce 13,027 Posts

  • theory9theory9 1,128 Posts
    Yes, I notice you and notice you have a personal life. I also notice that you talk louder and longer when your phone calls are personal and you know what? It's not working. I don't care about your personal life and don't think you are interesting or witty. I doubt neither one of our cube neighbors think you are either. Your laugh sucks. I don't care that you saw a blues band last nite and had the best martini. I don't care that you watched Frontline last nite. I don't care about how appalled you were at Betsy's outfit on Saturday. You are boring and I can't wait to move cubes on Friday cause headphones just aren't doing the trick anymore

    Audrey

    I owe you an apology. So sorry to have disturbed you in a time of need.

    Theo

  • Mr_Lee_PHDMr_Lee_PHD 2,042 Posts
    don't we all know someone like this? people who want you to hear their conversation??

    Too true. No matter which workplace, in which country, there is always someone who LIVES for putting their life on blast.

    What I dont understand is why they can't sense the fact that their audience would rather kick their seat out from under them, give them a next level wedgie and beat them in the face with the receiver.
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