Twos
james
chicago 1,863 Posts
I'm saying:
Two songs I???d like to have on 45, nice and loud and with instrumental b-sides:
- Sharlene Boodram???s ???Chutney Time???
- Rod Lee???s ???Feel Me???
(Bonus Beat: Gasface to Michel Fugain???s ???Attention Mesdames Et Messieurs,??? which I was geeked to get on picture-sleeve 45, only to find that the verses were re-recorded in German. I???m still sore over that shit.)
Two unfuckwithable one-note solos:
- The organ solo in Toussaint McCall???s ???Shimmy???
- The Variophon solo in Talk Talk???s ???After The Flood???
Two notes I found attached to records:
- On my copy of Piano Choir???s Handscapes:
???PLEASE SHOW SOME CONCERN AND RESPECT FOR THE PROPERTY OF OTHERS AND HANDLE THIS RECORD WITH CARE. PLEASE/U> HANDLE THE RECORD BY THE EDGES ONLY. YOUR FINGER PRINTS HAVE ACID IN THEM AND THIS MARS THE SURFACE OF THE RECORD. SHOULD THIS RECORD BE RETURNED TO ME WITH FINGER PRINTS OR SCRATCHES ON IT, YOU WILL NEVER IN THE HISTORY OF LIFE BE ABLE TO GET ANOTHER RECORD FROM ME. THANK YOU VERY MUCH, AND ENJOY IT! ??? Santa Bear 33277???
- On my copy of Girls??? ???Hellhole Ratrace??? (laced in a trade with soulstrut???s own SoulOnIce, although it was not???as I???m sure he???d want me to point out???from his personal collection):
???Bo-ring???
(It???s funny because it???s true!)
Two excellently named spots I pass when driving West out on like 79th:
- Just Kicking It, Inc. (???Grown And Sexy Clothing???)
- Reggie???s Leathery (shoe repair)
Two slept-on uses of the ???Shack Up??? break:
- Camp Lo???s ???Baby Mother???
- Happy Mondays??? ???God???s Cop???
(Bonus Beat #1: ???God???s Cop??? gets extra gully points for the line ???Son, I???m thirty / I only went with your mother ???cause she???s dirty.??? Bonus Beat #2: Back when I had the stamina to make French-press coffee every fucking morning, our press was made by Bodum, a name which I could never resist saying three times in a row to the tune of the ???Shack Up??? bassline.)
Two things overheard in transit:
- A thirtysomething mother into her cellphone: ???Well, we???ve been working with Marlon???s teachers and school a lot???he???s been having???dookie issues.???
- One Abercrombie-and-Fitch-made college doofus to another: ???Yeah, so I snuck over there with some old urine in a Martinelli???s bottle??????
(Bonus Beat: Bubble-goosed high-schooler to his homie: ???Even in a parka, that girl???s got ass.???)
Two cross-racial equivalents:
- ???Love You Down??? is the black ???I???m Not In Love???
- Ray Sawyer is the white Flavor Flav
(Bonus Cross-Genre Beat: Keith Hudson is the reggae Gary ???Chocolate Star??? Davis)
Two youtube videos whose Comments sections will usher you into harrowing demimondes of middle-aged desire that you did not know existed:
- Ladies: ???Steve Perry sending you a kiss???
- Gentlemen: ???Dr. Hook-Baby Makes Her Blue Jeans Talk???
Two heavily-accented music-documentary talking heads that I could listen to all day:
- Will Socolov from the Arthur Russell thing (???Whut the fuck are you tawking about?!???)
- Billy Bragg from the John Peel???s record box thing (Mark E. Smith???s name comes out as ???Mar-Ghee Smiff???)
Two truly terrible music-influenced fashion decisions I made during high school:
- In the depths of my Native Tongues phase, I once or twice wore a pith helmet socially.
- After becoming obsessed with that first Suicidal Tendencies tape freshman year, I wore all my button-up shirts cholo style, with just the top button did. And these shirts weren???t even like Pendletons or anything???they were super-suburban, super-cheap jernts that my mom bought at Sam???s Club in plastic-bagged three-packs. The horror.
Two musical ???You so ugly???s from the Caribbean:
- ???She face like Jack Palance??? (I forget who said this???Mighty Sparrow? Lord Melody?)
- ???You face long like eye-talian donkey??? (Fuzzy Jones)
Two ???Oh, this sounds just like?????? statements that are never ever ever accurate:
- ??????Prince!???
- ??????This Heat!???
Two baffling fashion occurrences in my neighborhood:
- A rash of black dudes dressing like Larry Fishburne in School Daze, with the short brown bomber and the kufi and the kente cloth and the tight jeans and shit. Wake up, indeed.
- Total eyeglass-frame arms race at the local produce spot. It???s like this: The checkout at this place is staffed almost entirely by Hispanic ladies in their twenties, almost all of whom wear eyeglasses, with varying degrees of fashion and prescription. They all started off with those broadly stylish and vaguely feline black-plastic frames that ladies wear, but then at some point during this past Summer, they started escalating: One of them ditched the black frames for some black frames with white temples, then the next week another one of them had some joints that were half-black and half-white all over, then the next week another one would have some red ones, and on and on, like this weird little drama. The black female patrons for the most part did not figure into it, as in my neighborhood they???re mostly on some throwback Bad-Boy-era black wraparounds with Versace-style gold medallions at the temple shit, and thus do not seem to be on the checkout ladies??? radar, though every once in a while some university-affiliated chick from like Switzerland or someplace will roll through in space-age anodized five-color wire-rims and just upset their whole shit, resulting in much sucking of teeth and much perturbed chatter en espanol. Things seem to have calmed down in the last couple weeks, but man, shit was kinda mainey for a while there.
Two college-era makeout-music mishaps:
- Once, improper programming of a cd player led to endless replays of some Luscious Jackson song. We hung in there for a while, but eventually had to bail out like DJ Rogers.
- I had playing a ninety-minute TDK that I had originally used to tape off of the radio a re-broadcast of a full Rick James concert from the early eighties, but had since taped over with non-interruptive soul-jazz stuff for situations just such as this (hey, I was young, you know?). I must have missed a little bit at the very end, though, because right in the middle of things, the music ended, there were a couple minutes of tape silence, and then the cocaine-enhanced voice of the one Rick James came booming at top volume, ???BOSTON! YOU ARE NUMBER???ONE!???
Two Biz-Markie-originated synonyms for ???everybody??? that I use with some frequency:
- ???Moms, pops, and cops???
- ???Radio, TV, and even the press???
Two completely ludicrous music-related PSAs:
- That Iron Maiden pro-seatbelt TV ad where Bruce Dickinson admonishes a fake concert crowd to buckle up, gesturing to the unconvincingly animatronic zombie stage-set and intoning, ???You don???t want to end up like Eddie!???
- When I saw Public Enemy back in like ???91, they performed ???One Million Bottlebags??? with a ten-foot-tall elementary-school-art-class papier-mache malt liquor bottle that was labeled ???40 DOG,??? At the conclusion of the song, Chuck said with great seriousness something like, ???Yo, you need to lay off that poison, or this could be you!???, at which point the 40 DOG opened like a rickety closet to reveal a cardboard skeleton that looked like it had been snatched off of some old lady???s front door last October.
Two songs that manage to effectively distill very complex ideas into single phrases:
- Love, as explained in Santana???s ???Game Of Love???: ???Divide me into one???
- Race, as explained in Wu Tang Clan???s ???Triumph???: ???We at odds ???til we even???
(Bonus Beat: Everything else, as explained in Sly &The; Family Stone???s ???Family Affair???: ???You can???t cry, ???cause you???ll look broke down / but you???re crying anyway, ???cause you???re all broke down???)
Two ???I don???t but I do???s:
- I don???t consider myself a hardcore record junkie, but I do have record-related dreams every couple weeks. (Most recently: I was in a well-lit junk shop and pulled a quadruple-ten-inch electric-era Miles Davis set called Sleep)
- I don???t go to church, but I do usually end up playing some Arthur Russell every Sunday. I don???t ever really plan to, it just kinda works out that way.
Two weird lyrical invocations of Jesus:
- ???Jesus Christ, silver and gold, / stands naked in a room full of modern man??? (Beginning Of The End???s ???I Got The News???)
- ???There???s a sea bird above you / gliding in one place / like Jesus in the sky??? (Jackson Browne???s ???Rock Me On The Water??? [I can only really fuck with Johnny Rivers???s cover version, though])
Two painters??? wives for whom I would purchase a cocktail as well as perhaps soup and half a sandwich, just on the strength of their names:
- Quappi Beckmann
- Teenie Duchamp
Two possibly controversial statements:
- Television (the band) was better after Richard Hell left.
- Everything that makes ZZ Top interesting happened after they starting fucking with the Fairlight.
(Bonus Beat #1: Captain Beefheart???s catalog is every bit as sexless as The Beach Boys???. Bonus Beat #2: ???A Funky Space Reincarnation??? is wack???the weakest link on a great record.)
Two songs that withhold their titular moments until the very end, to great effect:
- Journey???s ???Don???t Stop Believin??????
- The Cure???s ???Let???s Go To Bed???
(Bonus Beat: Alice In Chains???s ???Would????)
Two notable revelations from Vince Aletti???s The Disco Files
- The Meters??? ???Jungle Man??? sped up to 45 and pitched down makes a viable dance banger.
- The almighty Chic apparently did not in their day get much respect from real disco heads.
Two LPs of entry-level Motown crust that I still ride for:
- Jr. Walker???s Shotgun
- Stevie???s Eivets Rednow
Two no-names-rocking-over-Ultimate-Breaks-And-Beats that showed up on my iPod and that I can get with (Note: apologies if either of these dudes is not actually a no-name; I haven???t purchased a rap record since Live From Acknickulous Land, so I don???t really know who anybody is anymore):
- J.R. Writer - ???We Gettin??? It Baby???
- Chase & Status featuring Kano (I found this one while searching my hard drive for New York Cake, word to HarveyCanal) - ???Against All Odds???
Two minor but still cool samples:
- In Tuff Crew???s ???My Part Of Town,??? the little ???wha!??? (Kurtis Blow?) that comes right after ???..but when it came to battle, where the fuck was you?!???
- The ???Go on, now!??? (Richard Pryor?) in Nice & Smooth???s ???Dope Not Hype???
Two lyrical references to exotically furred hosiery:
- Nice & Smooth - ???Skill Trade???: ???Man of the world with my life to explore / Mink socks, leather suits, shirts made of velour???
- Masters Of Illusion ??? ???Silk Suit, Black Linen???: ???I rock an alligator-skin tank top, matched with snake shorts, / buffalo socks, lamb shoes, and a ferret hat???
Two pertinent tambourines:
- ???Think (About It)??? ??? Lyn Collins
- ???Today??? ??? Jefferson Airplane
(Bonus Beat: If I had a band called Pertinent Tambourines, I???m pretty sure I could pull a 7.8 over at Pitchfork.)
Two duos I would like to see dressed in matching rugbys and fisherman hats, a la EPMD:
- Suicide
- Peter Gabriel and Kate Bush in the video for ???Don???t Give Up???
Two reasons I???m like this:
- Curtis Mayfield???s Superfly. The first record I ever picked out of a stack of others and put on a record player.
- Soulstrut dot com.
That???s all I???ve got for now. I was gonna do twenty-two of them???you know, like the rap song???but I think I went over. You know how it goes. I wanted to control it / but, love, I couldn???t hold it.
Anyway, I know there???s something you???ve got two of???whatever it is, bring it on down front. Now is probably the time.
Two songs I???d like to have on 45, nice and loud and with instrumental b-sides:
- Sharlene Boodram???s ???Chutney Time???
- Rod Lee???s ???Feel Me???
(Bonus Beat: Gasface to Michel Fugain???s ???Attention Mesdames Et Messieurs,??? which I was geeked to get on picture-sleeve 45, only to find that the verses were re-recorded in German. I???m still sore over that shit.)
Two unfuckwithable one-note solos:
- The organ solo in Toussaint McCall???s ???Shimmy???
- The Variophon solo in Talk Talk???s ???After The Flood???
Two notes I found attached to records:
- On my copy of Piano Choir???s Handscapes:
???PLEASE SHOW SOME CONCERN AND RESPECT FOR THE PROPERTY OF OTHERS AND HANDLE THIS RECORD WITH CARE. PLEASE/U> HANDLE THE RECORD BY THE EDGES ONLY. YOUR FINGER PRINTS HAVE ACID IN THEM AND THIS MARS THE SURFACE OF THE RECORD. SHOULD THIS RECORD BE RETURNED TO ME WITH FINGER PRINTS OR SCRATCHES ON IT, YOU WILL NEVER IN THE HISTORY OF LIFE BE ABLE TO GET ANOTHER RECORD FROM ME. THANK YOU VERY MUCH, AND ENJOY IT! ??? Santa Bear 33277???
- On my copy of Girls??? ???Hellhole Ratrace??? (laced in a trade with soulstrut???s own SoulOnIce, although it was not???as I???m sure he???d want me to point out???from his personal collection):
???Bo-ring???
(It???s funny because it???s true!)
Two excellently named spots I pass when driving West out on like 79th:
- Just Kicking It, Inc. (???Grown And Sexy Clothing???)
- Reggie???s Leathery (shoe repair)
Two slept-on uses of the ???Shack Up??? break:
- Camp Lo???s ???Baby Mother???
- Happy Mondays??? ???God???s Cop???
(Bonus Beat #1: ???God???s Cop??? gets extra gully points for the line ???Son, I???m thirty / I only went with your mother ???cause she???s dirty.??? Bonus Beat #2: Back when I had the stamina to make French-press coffee every fucking morning, our press was made by Bodum, a name which I could never resist saying three times in a row to the tune of the ???Shack Up??? bassline.)
Two things overheard in transit:
- A thirtysomething mother into her cellphone: ???Well, we???ve been working with Marlon???s teachers and school a lot???he???s been having???dookie issues.???
- One Abercrombie-and-Fitch-made college doofus to another: ???Yeah, so I snuck over there with some old urine in a Martinelli???s bottle??????
(Bonus Beat: Bubble-goosed high-schooler to his homie: ???Even in a parka, that girl???s got ass.???)
Two cross-racial equivalents:
- ???Love You Down??? is the black ???I???m Not In Love???
- Ray Sawyer is the white Flavor Flav
(Bonus Cross-Genre Beat: Keith Hudson is the reggae Gary ???Chocolate Star??? Davis)
Two youtube videos whose Comments sections will usher you into harrowing demimondes of middle-aged desire that you did not know existed:
- Ladies: ???Steve Perry sending you a kiss???
- Gentlemen: ???Dr. Hook-Baby Makes Her Blue Jeans Talk???
Two heavily-accented music-documentary talking heads that I could listen to all day:
- Will Socolov from the Arthur Russell thing (???Whut the fuck are you tawking about?!???)
- Billy Bragg from the John Peel???s record box thing (Mark E. Smith???s name comes out as ???Mar-Ghee Smiff???)
Two truly terrible music-influenced fashion decisions I made during high school:
- In the depths of my Native Tongues phase, I once or twice wore a pith helmet socially.
- After becoming obsessed with that first Suicidal Tendencies tape freshman year, I wore all my button-up shirts cholo style, with just the top button did. And these shirts weren???t even like Pendletons or anything???they were super-suburban, super-cheap jernts that my mom bought at Sam???s Club in plastic-bagged three-packs. The horror.
Two musical ???You so ugly???s from the Caribbean:
- ???She face like Jack Palance??? (I forget who said this???Mighty Sparrow? Lord Melody?)
- ???You face long like eye-talian donkey??? (Fuzzy Jones)
Two ???Oh, this sounds just like?????? statements that are never ever ever accurate:
- ??????Prince!???
- ??????This Heat!???
Two baffling fashion occurrences in my neighborhood:
- A rash of black dudes dressing like Larry Fishburne in School Daze, with the short brown bomber and the kufi and the kente cloth and the tight jeans and shit. Wake up, indeed.
- Total eyeglass-frame arms race at the local produce spot. It???s like this: The checkout at this place is staffed almost entirely by Hispanic ladies in their twenties, almost all of whom wear eyeglasses, with varying degrees of fashion and prescription. They all started off with those broadly stylish and vaguely feline black-plastic frames that ladies wear, but then at some point during this past Summer, they started escalating: One of them ditched the black frames for some black frames with white temples, then the next week another one of them had some joints that were half-black and half-white all over, then the next week another one would have some red ones, and on and on, like this weird little drama. The black female patrons for the most part did not figure into it, as in my neighborhood they???re mostly on some throwback Bad-Boy-era black wraparounds with Versace-style gold medallions at the temple shit, and thus do not seem to be on the checkout ladies??? radar, though every once in a while some university-affiliated chick from like Switzerland or someplace will roll through in space-age anodized five-color wire-rims and just upset their whole shit, resulting in much sucking of teeth and much perturbed chatter en espanol. Things seem to have calmed down in the last couple weeks, but man, shit was kinda mainey for a while there.
Two college-era makeout-music mishaps:
- Once, improper programming of a cd player led to endless replays of some Luscious Jackson song. We hung in there for a while, but eventually had to bail out like DJ Rogers.
- I had playing a ninety-minute TDK that I had originally used to tape off of the radio a re-broadcast of a full Rick James concert from the early eighties, but had since taped over with non-interruptive soul-jazz stuff for situations just such as this (hey, I was young, you know?). I must have missed a little bit at the very end, though, because right in the middle of things, the music ended, there were a couple minutes of tape silence, and then the cocaine-enhanced voice of the one Rick James came booming at top volume, ???BOSTON! YOU ARE NUMBER???ONE!???
Two Biz-Markie-originated synonyms for ???everybody??? that I use with some frequency:
- ???Moms, pops, and cops???
- ???Radio, TV, and even the press???
Two completely ludicrous music-related PSAs:
- That Iron Maiden pro-seatbelt TV ad where Bruce Dickinson admonishes a fake concert crowd to buckle up, gesturing to the unconvincingly animatronic zombie stage-set and intoning, ???You don???t want to end up like Eddie!???
- When I saw Public Enemy back in like ???91, they performed ???One Million Bottlebags??? with a ten-foot-tall elementary-school-art-class papier-mache malt liquor bottle that was labeled ???40 DOG,??? At the conclusion of the song, Chuck said with great seriousness something like, ???Yo, you need to lay off that poison, or this could be you!???, at which point the 40 DOG opened like a rickety closet to reveal a cardboard skeleton that looked like it had been snatched off of some old lady???s front door last October.
Two songs that manage to effectively distill very complex ideas into single phrases:
- Love, as explained in Santana???s ???Game Of Love???: ???Divide me into one???
- Race, as explained in Wu Tang Clan???s ???Triumph???: ???We at odds ???til we even???
(Bonus Beat: Everything else, as explained in Sly &The; Family Stone???s ???Family Affair???: ???You can???t cry, ???cause you???ll look broke down / but you???re crying anyway, ???cause you???re all broke down???)
Two ???I don???t but I do???s:
- I don???t consider myself a hardcore record junkie, but I do have record-related dreams every couple weeks. (Most recently: I was in a well-lit junk shop and pulled a quadruple-ten-inch electric-era Miles Davis set called Sleep)
- I don???t go to church, but I do usually end up playing some Arthur Russell every Sunday. I don???t ever really plan to, it just kinda works out that way.
Two weird lyrical invocations of Jesus:
- ???Jesus Christ, silver and gold, / stands naked in a room full of modern man??? (Beginning Of The End???s ???I Got The News???)
- ???There???s a sea bird above you / gliding in one place / like Jesus in the sky??? (Jackson Browne???s ???Rock Me On The Water??? [I can only really fuck with Johnny Rivers???s cover version, though])
Two painters??? wives for whom I would purchase a cocktail as well as perhaps soup and half a sandwich, just on the strength of their names:
- Quappi Beckmann
- Teenie Duchamp
Two possibly controversial statements:
- Television (the band) was better after Richard Hell left.
- Everything that makes ZZ Top interesting happened after they starting fucking with the Fairlight.
(Bonus Beat #1: Captain Beefheart???s catalog is every bit as sexless as The Beach Boys???. Bonus Beat #2: ???A Funky Space Reincarnation??? is wack???the weakest link on a great record.)
Two songs that withhold their titular moments until the very end, to great effect:
- Journey???s ???Don???t Stop Believin??????
- The Cure???s ???Let???s Go To Bed???
(Bonus Beat: Alice In Chains???s ???Would????)
Two notable revelations from Vince Aletti???s The Disco Files
- The Meters??? ???Jungle Man??? sped up to 45 and pitched down makes a viable dance banger.
- The almighty Chic apparently did not in their day get much respect from real disco heads.
Two LPs of entry-level Motown crust that I still ride for:
- Jr. Walker???s Shotgun
- Stevie???s Eivets Rednow
Two no-names-rocking-over-Ultimate-Breaks-And-Beats that showed up on my iPod and that I can get with (Note: apologies if either of these dudes is not actually a no-name; I haven???t purchased a rap record since Live From Acknickulous Land, so I don???t really know who anybody is anymore):
- J.R. Writer - ???We Gettin??? It Baby???
- Chase & Status featuring Kano (I found this one while searching my hard drive for New York Cake, word to HarveyCanal) - ???Against All Odds???
Two minor but still cool samples:
- In Tuff Crew???s ???My Part Of Town,??? the little ???wha!??? (Kurtis Blow?) that comes right after ???..but when it came to battle, where the fuck was you?!???
- The ???Go on, now!??? (Richard Pryor?) in Nice & Smooth???s ???Dope Not Hype???
Two lyrical references to exotically furred hosiery:
- Nice & Smooth - ???Skill Trade???: ???Man of the world with my life to explore / Mink socks, leather suits, shirts made of velour???
- Masters Of Illusion ??? ???Silk Suit, Black Linen???: ???I rock an alligator-skin tank top, matched with snake shorts, / buffalo socks, lamb shoes, and a ferret hat???
Two pertinent tambourines:
- ???Think (About It)??? ??? Lyn Collins
- ???Today??? ??? Jefferson Airplane
(Bonus Beat: If I had a band called Pertinent Tambourines, I???m pretty sure I could pull a 7.8 over at Pitchfork.)
Two duos I would like to see dressed in matching rugbys and fisherman hats, a la EPMD:
- Suicide
- Peter Gabriel and Kate Bush in the video for ???Don???t Give Up???
Two reasons I???m like this:
- Curtis Mayfield???s Superfly. The first record I ever picked out of a stack of others and put on a record player.
- Soulstrut dot com.
That???s all I???ve got for now. I was gonna do twenty-two of them???you know, like the rap song???but I think I went over. You know how it goes. I wanted to control it / but, love, I couldn???t hold it.
Anyway, I know there???s something you???ve got two of???whatever it is, bring it on down front. Now is probably the time.
Comments
Hard act to follow.
This video is cray:
-I'd swap out The Cure's "Let's Go To Bed" and replace it with The Cure's "Just Like Heaven" but then again, the titular moment isn't necessarily the best moment on the song so maybe this ISN'T the best example.
-Jimi Hendrix: "And the Wind Cries Mary."
Two songs-within-songs that are better than the song they're within
Public Enemy: By the Time I Get To Arizona (the J5 section)
Soft Cell: Tainted Love (when they switch over to the Supremes...though technically, I guess it's really just a second song attached? Hard to call)
Thanks for putting me up on that JR Writer song.
I'd post some two's, but would feel like I'm frontin'
Great stuff!
Was tired, now I'm AWAKE!!!
Two colognes I foxed with in high school
- Drakkar Noir
- Alfred Dunhill Edition
BBQ-rib tips
Tacos-barbacoa
Two slices of inspired lyricism from Kiss's "100,000 years"
- come over here and reacquaint yourself with my style
- I was just about to ooh yeah
:killin_it:
Alpha: He creates threads
Omega: He ends threads
(Bonus beats: He does both at the same time.)
Come on--anyone can play:
Two records I always have to get up and go check and see if they're skipping, only to find out they're just mad repetetive:
- Cal Tjader's Hip Vibrations
- Hot Mix 5's ACID LP
Two Johnny Osbourne versions that are fucking me up:
- "Ice Cream Love"
- "He Can Turn The Tide"
Two things my parents never talked to me about:
- love bizarre
- sex ornate
See? It's easy!
Seen. I had a sample vial of Drakkar that I nursed for a while, but I think I was mainly on hand-me-downs from my dad, like English Leather and Geoffrey Beene. I had an aunt that used to always hit me off with these excessive gift sets (like, a bottle of Brut that came with a little hand towel that said "BRUT" on it and a burrito-sized bar of scented soap carved in the shape of letters spelling--wait for it--"BRUT"), but those were kept below the sink, strictly for desperation situations. One time when the well ran dry I resorted to some Stetson she'd sent, but lord, that shit smelled like burnt horse.
Two scent-related records I have in boxes somewhere:
- Some promo 45 put out by Avon singing the praises of the "Charlie Girl". Sample lyrics: "On her bike or waterskis / she's so happy, right at ease!"
- Brook Benton's "South Carolina" 45 on--of all things--the Brut label. Records are crazy, man.
UGK - Front Back & Side to Side Remix
Robin Trower - Long Misty Days
My 2 favorite songs to play pitched up right now:
Fiend - Walk That Line
Sergio Mendes - Promise of a Fisherman
The 2 bands that were at Fun Fun Fun Fest here in Austin last weekend that I wish I would have caught:
Seaweed
Superchunk
1) Liz Phair
2) Cee-Lo
Two Sporcle quizzes I was proud to have conquered:
1) Countries of the world quiz: There are 196 countries in the world. The first time I took this quiz, I could name about 120. I kept taking the quiz every day--sometimes multiple times per day--until I learned them all. The day I finally beat the quiz, I pretty much took the rest of the day off from work to bask in my accomplishment.
2) Minefield Maze II: I dig logic puzzles like these, and this one's kinda tricky.
Two terrific articles people should read:
1) "The Yankee Comandante" in The New Yorker. The amazing story of William Alexander Morgan, an American drifter who ended up being an important leader--and fighter--in the Cuban revolution and ultimately was betrayed and murdered by FIdel Castro. If this story were a movie, I would've panned it as being ridiculous. But it really happened.
2) "The Case of the Mormon Historian" on (of all places) Slate.com. The tagline for this piece is "What happened when Michael Quinn challenged the history of the church he loved," but in the course of telling that story, the article also shines some light on the structure of the Mormon church and how the religion functions as a day-to-day enterprise. Interesting stuff.
1. tom robbins
2. james
Why must I cry!
b/w
johnny two times:
Alas, it has been brought to my attention by soulstrut's Liverpool/Berlin Bureau that the lyrics I quoted are in fact from "Kinky Afro," and not "God's Cop." Thus, in place of ???Son, I???m thirty / I only went with your mother ???cause she???s dirty???, please substitute "Man, did you fook it? / Baby brother, I took it!", and in place of "extra gully," please substitute "extra extra gully."
Thank you.
Cherry plays hide and seek in the abandoned refrigerator. (a major life lesson for me. Seriously informative. I'll never forget that).
Punky is jealous that Margot got tits. (Soleil later in life needs a breast reduction).
With that...
Two Ungoogleable Clips that Would Make Great Mixtape Soundbites:
- At some point in the '80s, Dana Carvey and Phil Hartman were doing their Johnny Carson and Ed McMahon impersonations. I wanna say it was for some MTV awards show, but I can't be sure. Anyway, at one point, they cut to Phil playing a very drunk fake Ed. He's sitting on the beach, holding a tumbler, and he slurs, "Tonight's show is brought to you by Pepsi." Then he looks at his drink and says, "Not a bad mixer."
- There was a commercial in the '70s for a piano dealer. It was very of-the-era, complete with moody music and stop-motion animation, and told the story of a boy to whom no one would listen. His friends wouldn't listen. His parents wouldn't listen. Even his cat wouldn't listen. (Cue animation of giant lion as his cat.) Then, the boy learns to play the piano and, don'tcha know, everybody's all on his nutsacc. "An amazing thing happened. Everyone listened. Even his cat."
Two Divisive Strutteurs Whose Presence I Sorely Miss:
- Faux_Rillz
- Bambouche
Two Smells That Make Me Angry:
- Patchouli. Shit smells like spicy dirt--and you applied it on purpose?
- Actually, there's the only one, but I hate it enough to list it twice, so I hope you'll allow "Lingering Stench of the Patchouli-Wearer Who Just Walked By."
Two Looks I Can't Abide:
- Dudes with the purposely loosened neck ties. Stop it. You are trying too hard.
- Properly tied-necktie WORN WITH SHORTS. I had never seen this before today, but now I have seen it twice. In different ZIP codes. And know that these critiques come from someone who rocked a suit vest with a bolo back in the (Chess King) day. (In my defense, I was in high school; I throw myself on the mercy of the jury.)
Two Disparate Albums that Band of Horses Makes Me Think of at Times:
- Neil Young Harvest
- My Bloody Valentine Loveless
Really? This was a regular look for me back in high school. I>Real mental as my then-idol Michael Bivins would say.
Also, Bam was divisive? I got the impression everybody loved him, save for a knucklehead or two.
Roy Stalin
Charles De Mar
1) Milford Plaza (aka "The Lullaby of Broadway")
2) Beautiful Mt. Airy Lodge