Your funniest facebook status friend
HarveyCanal
"a distraction from my main thesis." 13,234 Posts
About a year ago, I posted some status updates from my buddy Black Mike. Dude keeps me rolling. These are just from the past couple of weeks...
BM: Shout out to all the broken hearts out there remember to take it one day at a time time heals all wounds I feel your pain I no how that shit feel been thru it so hold yall heads and remember one day at a time cuase that heart be aching for real!!!
CL: Just get over it....NEXT! J/K...One day at a time....
BM: U can't eat can't sleep all u Do is think about the one u love u can't watch couples smiling can't lay in the bed yall laid in together everything in your house remind u of them mann from the clothes u wear all mann that heart break shit anit no joke even make it hard for a nigga to drive on a certain part of town lmao for real!!
BB:n stop actin like a lil BITCH!!!!!!! Lmao
BM: ???@bryson I no u anit talking nigga what about that time twin broke your heart and u layed on my couch for a week listening to carl thomas NIGGA with them black iversons doing the fool to my room lmao remember that nigga!!
BB:n Lmao oh well that was different!!!!
BB: Say nigga don't be puttin my love hurts business out there like that lmmfao, it's how u bounce back bruh! ( in my big choppa voice ) I been a G since then tho, Mr. county lock up! Lmao
TM: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH
JA: Lol. Black mike oh in love ass.lol. I remember when u were in love wit big crystal.lol.lol
BM: first of all john BIG CRYSTAL was your girl and john remember i had to talk you from shooting yourself when Z tore your world up and fuck yall if yall cant understand a nigga just being real expressing to the ladies that we hurt too just like yall we just dont show it lmao thats it!!!
JA: Lol. U a hoe. Don't be puttin my person biz out there. Ok I was on the brink of suicide ok!!! Lol. Keep it up and I'm a tell freaky toney to come get ya son, the soft one!!.lol.lol
BM: PSA from mojoes we just had to spend 3000 to get the tile redone cause them fat bitches in them heals be tearing that damn tile up trying to 2 step and shit lmao everybody anit meant to wear heals so think about it before u put your 300 pound ass in them tiny ass shoe lmao I'm done venting
BM: woke up to somebody knockin on my door that look like big precious i opened the door half sleep fat bitch scared the shit out of me i dropped my phone and everythang she talking about (in a horse voice) u need me to help u pick that up i told her naw But i need u to pick your 3 stomachs up off the ground and connect back to that tow truck so they can haul your big ass back to the water FREE WILLY!!
BM: I DIDNT EVEN NO KILLER WHALES HAD FEET SHE HAD TO LEFT FEET AT THAT LMAO OVER HERE LOOKING FOR COREY BARLOW LMAO!!!
MT: WHAT THE FU**! LMFAO U ARE OUT OF THE MARGIN WITH THAT
BM: SITTING OUT THERE WITH 2 LEFT FEET TRYING TO DO THE ELECTRIC SLIDE LMAO YALL BE DOING SHIT UNDER WATER LMAO ITS WAS SOMETHING ABOUT THE WAY SHE MOVED TO THE LEFT HELL THAT WAS THE ONLY WAY SHE COULD MOVE LMAO!!
TH: LMMFAO
AW: BOLMAO!
BM: bitch got mad talking about fuck you nigga and slapped me with one of them 3 stomachs knocked a nigga 32 feet back lmao
JL: Wow... yo azz is stupid... lmbo
AM: U know you let her in and let her give u some head! LMAO!
TG: Come on Mike...now that's the same honey u was mackin on at the club...told yo azz to quit rubbing on her stomacks...(yeah I said stomacks)......Sanging "There Goes my Baaaaaaby"...ROFL
BM: At lubys one deep like zro I just cussed out my waitress for trying to help I told her (sing like zro) I don't need no help my nigga I can do bad on my own then the black came out waitress she started singing along with me and got fired lmao
BM: WTF a woman just came to my mama house and asked to borrow a blunt with the weed in it and all when they start doing that mutherfuckers normally borrow sugar, pack of ground meat, can goods, koolaid, but a BLUNT WITH THE WEED damn then my mama say that mutherfucker don't never bring me no weed back neither WTF they beefing over borrowed weed lmao
CQ: does ruthie know you're sitting on the internet SNITCHIN'??? lol
NB: ROTFLMMFAO...ground meat...i wish sumbody would ask to borrow sum ground meat...
BM: Why my mama ghetto ass trying to put cornrolls in this white baby hair talkin bout that mutherfucker gone be cute with em in WTF rapping ruthie ass crazy then she say where the weed at hoe WTF my mama crazy!!!
LC: The apple don't fall far from the tree!
TJ: yes Yes she is to crazy thats my girl. Rappin Ruthie thats whats up
JA: Rappin ruthie got that donk.lol
BM: John stop talking about my mama booty u nasty fuck!!! Lmao
LS: Rappin ruthie that's my nigga till the end
Comments
i thought we'd get some gold out of this topic.