Eastern Europeans manning the Mall Kiosks?
Gary
3,982 Posts
Is it just me or all the kiosks at the mall manned by eastern europeans? They all have some sort of unidentifyable accent and they are aggressive like carneys.Horton Plaza is the worst though. Its like all the kiosks are run by a yugoslavian underground kiosk ring that if you start to investigate it you wind up dead....am i just paranoid?
Comments
Maybe there is an foreign exchange program and if I were to go the mall in Urzjbekistan there would be a bunch of weird americans manning the kiosks.
In my head I was like Wes from "Good Thing We're Rappin'": mack mack mack mack, but before I could say anything she grabbed me by the arm and pulled me towards the kiosk. She was selling some kind of cuticle cream and was aggressive as heck. "No ring, huh? Where's your girlfriend? Oh, no girlfriend? Well then your Mom will be happy 'cause today's 2 for 1 day!"
Now I'm normally good at ducking salespeople, I learned long ago that a simple "no thanks" is far less rude than their approach, but this woman was straight up massaging my hand while hypnotizing me with her scrumpdiddlyumptious and damn-near-perfect breasts. She knew what she was doing and she was great at it.
I let her run the whole routine and eventually the angel on my shoulder said "Snap out of it, dumm @$$! You ain't gettin' sh*t!" Still though, I had to lie to her to break the spell. "I'm late to meet my sister! I'll be back though!"..."You have a sister? Okay, I'll throw in another for $5 more! But you have to buy now before my boss comes back! *wink* *jiggle jiggle*". "Mmmmm....NO! I gotta go! I'll be back!" and with that I took her hand up off my hip and I dipped I dipped I dipped.
And oh, she had an accent.
Down Under they have been busting a whole bunch of Serbian, Romanian etc crime gangs that come down here for 'working holidays' which involves shoplifting rings, bag snatching and the latest one 'credit card skimming/fraud' (they attach readers to ATM amd steal all your info)
So maybe these guys are on the same tip just a bit smarter about it....
Yeah, they've got that Eastern European crime blood in them!
I know your local news is a little, how shall we say, Americentric, but still....
In the UK we have a whole gang of Poles. The girls are elfin and like to wear red pixie boots, green capes and dangly earrings. The lads are 6' 9", built like Klitschko and very upset about WW2. You will of course realise that these are stereotypes but nevertheless contain a real and profound truth.
* except in the name 'Former Yougoslav Republic of Macedonia'
They are everywhere. They were here locally for several years but I don't think the cuticle people have been around recently. I remember being surprised when I was in Boston and it was the "same" people with the same product and same pitch.
I honestly debated whether it was like that shit you read about like they got drug to the US and they tell them the INS will get them if they don't sell tons of cuticle cream or something.
These people always (twice) tell me they are Israeli and their miracle hand cream comes from the Dead Sea. I like the free manicure and how quickly they will drop the price. $70.00, but for you 2 for one. No? $30.00, that is a very good deal. No? (then they drop their voice and get all conspiratorial) $25.00, plus this special Dead Sea soap, bust you must not tell anyone else I gave you that price. No? $15.00...
My mother ended up buying 2 for $70.00, it's the first time I have ever known her to buy something she didn't want or buy something for more than the lowest price possible.
Not getting any of the agro-carney vibe off them, but then I can't remember the last time I was in a mall.
The few I've gotten to know tell me that they earn more in two months waiting tables than there Dads earn in a year of hard labor back home. I also get the impression they wouldn't mind marrying an American guy.
I worked at a yacht club on the vineyard for a summer with a Bulgarian couple. He was the bar tender and she waited tables. They were the nicest people I worked with, the rest of the people that worked there were as snotty as the members.