What's Killing You?

Hotsauce84Hotsauce84 8,450 Posts
edited February 2008 in Announcements
Upcoming Movie thread b/w Gamble's "Bring Me Down" track got me all twisted up in the game.A couple years ago I met a young lady by the name of T*resa W*lker. She was a friend and neighbor of J*nelle (my sneaker hookup) and they came through my club on girls' night out. During my break, I was introduced to Teresa. She was beautiful. Not club-sexy or shit like that, she just had a very stunning face. Porcelain skin, wide, friendly eyes and very short hair that curled against her forehead like a flapper girl from the '20's. She looked exactly like Betty Boop without the big ol' head. We talked for a bit and I don't even remember how it came to be, but we discovered that we were in the same small ass preschool class together. It's a trip, we both remembered everybody else in that class, but had no recollection of each other. She was funny and witty and I was a flirt so we exchanged numbers and started hanging out. It was nothing serious, just dinner and a movie, or we'd get a pizza and rent movies. Neither of us had any serious expectations other than chillin'.She worked at the University Of Arizona and we used to crack each other up via email every day. I remember one day she emailed me super excited 'cause she had read that Steve Martin and Queen Latifah - 2 of her favorite people EVER - were coming out with a movie. A month later, I got ahold of some screening passes to Bringin' Down The House and surprised her with them. We walked out of that movie speechless. Shit was beyond horrible. We admitted that we both wanted to walk out of the movie but we were afraid the other was liking it so we dealt with it.A couple weeks later, she told me she couldn't hang out anymore. We both understood the nature of our relationship, but her explanation was a little TOO apologetic. I'm a stubborn motherfucker so I pressed. She had to go away for awhile, she said. She was adamant about keeping her secret but her crypticness irked me and I made it clear that it did. After a couple days she emailed me reluctantly explaining that she had to go away for some hospital business. She was sick and had to undergo some tests. "Where?" I asked. "UMC." This girl was "going away" 2 blocks down from her house but had to live in the hospital for 6-7 months. The tests would be very difficult on her but she promised to call me when she felt up to it.4 months later she called. She was still weak, but feeling a bit better. We talked every week or so and when she was in good spirits I asked - kinda begged - to visit her. She said yes. She was in love with Ben Stiller and had told me about his comedy sketch show that she loved to watch. I had tracked down some dude selling VHS copies of the entire short-lived series on the internet and showed up to the hospital with her early bday present. We stayed up for hours watching the tapes. The nurse let me sleep in the visitor chair in her room.This girl was the sweetest, most angelic person I've ever known. We were never in love with each other, but knowing her made me fall in love with life. She knew what was coming. She was at peace with it and she knew what she had to do to make it easier for herself and, believe it or not, for me. Never once did she let her condition break her spirit, which made it rather odd when, again, she said she couldn't hang out anymore. She said it as she did before - with an apologetic smile - but there was confidence behind it, a strong confidence that shut down my stubbornness and kept me from asking questions. I understood, I had no choice but to understand. We stopped talking, but that didn't stop me from trying. Emails went unanswered. Cellphone was disconnected. Home phone too.A year later, I run into J*nelle. I hug her and my first question is "How's T?" Her look said it all. She spent her final months living with her sister. The doctors did everything they could. There was nothing for her to do but wait patiently.Out of habit, I had sent her a birthday email 2 weeks before, just in case. It went unanswered.I miss you, T*resa. 8/31/74 - 7/3/2006

  Comments


  • GambleGamble 844 Posts
    Really Beautiful.




    Im kind of touched and speechless that my track could have had a part in bringing these feelings up. Thats the greatest compliment/whateverthefuckhaveyou I can imagine.

    Amazing post. Sounds like she was an incredible lady.

  • Your song came on right after I posted in the movie thread. It stayed on for hours. The more I listened, the sadder I became. Every word made me miss my friend. After I typed the above, I laid back, just reminiscing. Little by little, each line made me think of her in new light. I could feel her smile. It's weird, it's like your lyrics took on an entirely different meaning then what I had heard before. Love brought me down...then lifted me up.

    Thank you.

  • Just wanted to thank you for posting this, Herm.

    The original "What's Killing You?" thread lead to some real-world friendships for me--ones that I really cherish. Just seeing that you'd started a new one made me realize that I'd have nothing to contribute to one right now, as nothing is killing me. Sure, I got complaints, but in light of your post (and many from the OG thread), I have no complaints.

    Ll??vatelo suave, holmes.
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