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The Handshake

RockadelicRockadelic Out Digging 13,993 Posts
edited January 2008 in Strut Central
Just met a new co-worker, shook dude's hand and got the limp cold dead fish grip.No big deal or not a good look.Discuss.
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  • JuniorJunior 4,853 Posts


    Sorry to say, this would be an instant black mark against their name in my book.

    This thread has so many pasue possibilities it boggles the mind.
  • MondeyanoMondeyano Reykjavik 863 Posts
    NAGL. The handshake is a one of those basic things that you need to have on lock. So important for first impressions and speaks volumes on confidence.
  • The_NonThe_Non 5,691 Posts
    Perhaps he wanted you to kiss his ring bitch!
  • RockadelicRockadelic Out Digging 13,993 Posts
    Perhaps he wanted you to kiss his ring bitch!

    Only ring he had on was an earring
  • The-gafflerThe-gaffler 2,190 Posts
    hahahahahaha, those handshakes are always hilarious in a subtle way. it's hard to pinpoint what's so funny about it, but i deal with a lot of handshaking everyday and a firm one makes all the difference. i tend to give people the questionable eye when they do that on some "huh?" type gesture. that will usually give em the hint.

    try and reverse rolls on the limp-fish too on people you know ...the reactions are hilarious.
  • funkfromthesunfunkfromthesun 212 Posts
    It's always something with those people. Makes one to consider that
  • SoulhawkSoulhawk 3,197 Posts
    what about those 'mans man' dudes who try to crush your hand?

    lame
  • bobbydeebobbydee 849 Posts
    Whats worse though, the limp fish, or the CRUSHINATOR designed to let you know they are harder/better/faster/stronger than you?
  • The_NonThe_Non 5,691 Posts
    what about those 'mans man' dudes who try to crush your hand?

    lame

    Dinky wang syndrome.
  • SoulhawkSoulhawk 3,197 Posts
    "nice to meet you, I'm an asshole"

    ---
  • DB_CooperDB_Cooper Manhatin' 7,823 Posts
    NAGL. The handshake is a one of those basic things that you need to have on lock. So important for first impressions and speaks volumes on confidence.

    It really does speak volumes. When you get that limp hand, you know you can pretty much dictate your will to that person, and they'll fall in line.

  • twoplytwoply Only Built 4 Manzanita Links 2,914 Posts
    what about those 'mans man' dudes who try to crush your hand?

    lame

    Dinky wang syndrome.


    I disagree. I think it's often a "can you take this without complaining like a bitch about it" test.

    The limp handshake creeps me out.
  • grandpa_shiggrandpa_shig 5,799 Posts
    I HATE THE MOTHEREFFING HIPHOP HANDSHAKE
  • DB_CooperDB_Cooper Manhatin' 7,823 Posts
    I HATE THE MOTHEREFFING HIPHOP HANDSHAKE

    Is that the one where I go to shake your hand, but you make a fist to give me a pound, and I awkwardly try to adjust mid-extension, at which point you decide to accommodate my open hand style with a slap and snap, which I try to follow, but the snap doesn't quite work?

    I thought that was the fifth element.
  • grandpa_shiggrandpa_shig 5,799 Posts
    I HATE THE MOTHEREFFING HIPHOP HANDSHAKE

    Is that the one where I go to shake your hand, but you make a fist to give me a pound, and I awkwardly try to adjust mid-extension, at which point you decide to accommodate my open hand style with a slap and snap, which I try to follow, but the snap doesn't quite work?

    I thought that was the fifth element.

    YES AND HIP HOP HUGS ARE LEVEL 6 ELEMENTALS SERIOUSLY WITH THE HALF ASS ARMWRASSLE HANDSHAKE AND THE ONE ARM ON THE BACK/SLAP GADDAMMAT I KNOW IM CUDDLY GO AHEAD AND HUG ME ITS OK

    OH AND I LIKE HOW A HIP HOP HUG IS USUALLY PROCEEDED BY SOME SLIGHTLY MASCULINE HOMOEROTIC HIP HOP PROVERB LIKE "ONE LOVE" "GOOD LOOKEN" LIKE I DONT ALREADY KNOW IM GOOD LOOKEN
  • sabadabadasabadabada 5,966 Posts
    i hate people who grab your hand around the fingers so you cant get a proper grip to intentionally make you feel like your shake is inadequate.
  • hogginthefogghogginthefogg 6,098 Posts
    The dead fish handshake is so deeply disturbing to me that I have to shake hands properly with someone immediately thereafter to counteract the disgusting feeling it leaves me with.
  • DB_CooperDB_Cooper Manhatin' 7,823 Posts
    The dead fish handshake is so deeply disturbing to me that I have to shake hands properly with someone immediately thereafter to counteract the disgusting feeling it leaves me with.

    Even better???knowing that they're easily pushed around, you just look them dead in the eye and say in a menacing voice "Now shake hands with me like a man."
  • grandpa_shiggrandpa_shig 5,799 Posts
    when i came back from japan i instinctively bowed to everyone for about 2 months.
  • iron_monkeyiron_monkey 985 Posts
    I have a problem with both the dead man shake and the crushinator, BUT the WORST offender in my book is the motherfucker who doesn't look you in the eye when shaking hands. Instantly red flagged as a person with weak character or (worse) a person who cannot be trusted.
  • RockadelicRockadelic Out Digging 13,993 Posts
    I have a problem with both the dead man shake and the crushinator, BUT the WORST offender in my book is the motherfucker who doesn't look you in the eye when shaking hands. Instantly red flagged as a person with weak character or (worse) a person who cannot be trusted.

    Dude....you just hit one of my pet peeves....

    People who stare off into space when they talk to you....or worse...close their eyes.!!!
  • JuniorJunior 4,853 Posts
    I have a problem with both the dead man shake and the crushinator, BUT the WORST offender in my book is the motherfucker who doesn't look you in the eye when shaking hands. Instantly red flagged as a person with weak character or (worse) a person who cannot be trusted.

    Dude....you just hit one of my pet peeves....

    People who stare off into space when they talk to you....or worse...close their eyes.!!!

    I find people who refuse to make eye contact extremely irritating. We don't have to gaze into eachother's souls but at least look in my direction when talking. Having said that I work with a guy with two lazy eyes and, after many attempts, I still can't work out which one I should be making eye contact with so I tend to either flit between both or choose a non judgemental point on his forehead.
  • drewnicedrewnice 5,465 Posts
    The most disturbing is the sopping wet noodle handshake.
  • grandpa_shiggrandpa_shig 5,799 Posts
    personally i see nothing wrong with the wet noodle handshake. i mean, sure its gross and kinda lame and stigmatized with being weak or whatevers but it is a pretty antiquated gauge of character. i mean, with the internets and all u can easily be a antisocial recluse running websites about weird records that suck ( ) and live a completely productive life from say noon to 3pm. no, but seriously, this sounds like some corny man shit from like the 50s.
  • markus71markus71 937 Posts
    The dead fish handshake is so deeply disturbing to me that I have to shake hands properly with someone immediately thereafter to counteract the disgusting feeling it leaves me with.

    Doctor's most of the time give you a handshake like that.
  • drewnicedrewnice 5,465 Posts
    personally i see nothing wrong with the wet noodle handshake. i mean, sure its gross and kinda lame and stigmatized with being weak or whatevers but it is a pretty antiquated gauge of character. i mean, with the internets and all u can easily be a antisocial recluse running websites about weird records that suck ( ) and live a completely productive life from say noon to 3pm. no, but seriously, this sounds like some corny man shit from like the 50s.

    I have been on both sides of the SWHS. Either way, I feel the pain.
  • JuniorJunior 4,853 Posts
    The dead fish handshake is so deeply disturbing to me that I have to shake hands properly with someone immediately thereafter to counteract the disgusting feeling it leaves me with.

    Doctor's most of the time give you a handshake like that.

    If I was a doctor I'd be pretty reluctant to shake a patient's hands full stop - they're all ill and diseased.
  • nzshadownzshadow 5,518 Posts
    I have a problem with both the dead man shake and the crushinator, BUT the WORST offender in my book is the motherfucker who doesn't look you in the eye when shaking hands. Instantly red flagged as a person with weak character or (worse) a person who cannot be trusted.

    pretty much sums it up for me too.
  • highschemehighscheme 784 Posts
    I have a problem with both the dead man shake and the crushinator, BUT the WORST offender in my book is the motherfucker who doesn't look you in the eye when shaking hands. Instantly red flagged as a person with weak character or (worse) a person who cannot be trusted.

    pretty much sums it up for me too.

    No offense, but you guys are on some basic level type shit here

    Most people know about the whole eye-contact, firm handshake bullshit, so it is basically meaningless. Any truly shady fuck would want to hide his true shadiness by looking you in the eye, and gripping your hand firmly.

    Dude that doesn't do this may not have the best social skills, but it doesn't mean shit if someone does this
  • DJBombjackDJBombjack Miami 1,665 Posts
    choose a non judgemental point on his forehead


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