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EXCUSE ME?!? [WORK RELATED]

grandpa_shiggrandpa_shig 5,799 Posts
edited January 2007 in Strut Central
i need a good one. work related. not some booboo tummy hurts thing neither. give me your bestest plaese!

  Comments

  • DJCireDJCire 729 Posts
    do you have kids?
  • jaymackjaymack 5,199 Posts
    my sister/female friend/cousin is broken down, and needs help/ride.
  • grandpa_shiggrandpa_shig 5,799 Posts
    dangit! nope.

    that is perfect tho!
  • kitchenknightkitchenknight 4,922 Posts
    diarrhea.

    waaaay better than puking, because they won't suspect hangover. and, you say the D word, and no one wants any more information, and no more questions.
  • Jonny_PaycheckJonny_Paycheck 17,825 Posts
    Your bank just called you and said someone has stolen your identity and is trying to access your accounts. You need to go down to the branch and fill out a mess of paperwork.
  • grandpa_shiggrandpa_shig 5,799 Posts
    my sister/female friend/cousin[/b] is broken down, and needs help/ride.

    holy moly! christmas dinner at your house musta been a hoot!
  • grandpa_shiggrandpa_shig 5,799 Posts
    Your bank just called you and said someone has stolen your identity and is trying to access your accounts. You need to go down to the branch and fill out a mess of paperwork.

    BRILLIANT!
  • jaymackjaymack 5,199 Posts
    my sister/female friend/cousin[/b] is broken down, and needs help/ride.

    holy moly! christmas dinner at your house musta been a hoot!

  • CousinLarryCousinLarry 4,618 Posts
    diarrhea.

    waaaay better than puking, because they won't suspect hangover. and, you say the D word, and no one wants any more information, and no more questions.

    Yes start out holding your stomach saying something like. "Oh I had this egg salad last night, I think I left it in the fridge to long..it...oh" then quickly go to the bathroom. Come back to the office about 20 minutes later and say, "I need to go home." No one will say anything.
  • DJFerrariDJFerrari 2,411 Posts
    Gotta wait at home for the cable guy... he'll be there sometime between 9 and 5
  • CousinLarryCousinLarry 4,618 Posts
    Gotta wait at home for the cable guy... he'll be there sometime between 9 and 5


    I would go with plumber, heating and AC guy, or something like that. They seem more urgent.
  • Mr_Lee_PHDMr_Lee_PHD 2,042 Posts
    diarrhea.

    waaaay better than puking, because they won't suspect hangover. and, you say the D word, and no one wants any more information, and no more questions.

    Yes start out holding your stomach saying something like. "Oh I had this egg salad last night, I think I left it in the fridge to long..it...oh" then quickly go to the bathroom. Come back to the office about 20 minutes later and say, "I need to go home." No one will say anything.

    Or just straight shit yourself then they'll let you go straight home.

  • Mr. CasualMr. Casual 953 Posts
    diarrhea.

    waaaay better than puking, because they won't suspect hangover. and, you say the D word, and no one wants any more information, and no more questions.

    Yes start out holding your stomach saying something like. "Oh I had this egg salad last night, I think I left it in the fridge to long..it...oh" then quickly go to the bathroom. Come back to the office about 20 minutes later and say, "I need to go home." No one will say anything.

    Or just straight shit yourself then they'll let you go straight home.


  • CousinLarryCousinLarry 4,618 Posts
    Really though sometimes just saying you have to go and not giving a reason is the best. "I need to leave I have some family issues to sort out." The more you explain the more chance you have of looking .
  • eliseelise 3,252 Posts
    Telling "Aunt Flow" is visiting and your sex change therapist thinks its best if you went home when she "visited".

    You may get some pats on the back, or some free meds, eh??




    like that, cha'll.
  • spaceghostspaceghost 605 Posts
    tell them you lost your phone charger and couldn't call in. or that you left your phone in your car all day. always worked for/with me.

    fuck making up an excuse. just call in the morning when you first wake up and say you are not feeling well. if nobody is there leave a message with the answering machine. unless you do your karaoke exercises beforehand your voice might even be a little scratchy. tell them you are going to stay home and rest and you will be in the following day. give them a number where they can reach you if they have an emergency where they might need your help. no extra information.

    have a good time and bring me back a pie.
  • keithvanhornkeithvanhorn 3,855 Posts
    "i need to have some dental work taken care of" is the best excuse ever. everyone hates going to the dentist. your boss will say "ouch, good luck with that." guaranteed.
  • mrmatthewmrmatthew 1,575 Posts
    Is it cold where you are?

    FREEZING cold?

    If so, maybe your water pipes froze and then burst?
  • asstroasstro 1,754 Posts
    "i need to have some dental work taken care of" is the best excuse ever. everyone hates going to the dentist. your boss will say "ouch, good luck with that." guaranteed.

    This is definitely the move. If you are in the office just clutch your mouth and run to the bathroom, come out after a couple of minutes and give them "I think a filling just fell out!" with an appropriately pained look/voice. Instant sympathy. Not that I would do such a thing...
  • behemothbehemoth 2,189 Posts
    tell your boss that your wife called and wants to have a crazy 5 hr long fuck session. your boss will ask if he can come film it.
  • grandpa_shiggrandpa_shig 5,799 Posts
    tell them you lost your phone charger and couldn't call in. or that you left your phone in your car all day. always worked for/with me.

    you must think youre soooo smart.



    bring me back a pie.

    will do!
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