Sign In
Toggle navigation
Home
Community
Mixes
Music Archive
About
Community
Home
Heading 1
Heading 2
Quote
Code
Spoiler
Drop image/file
or
Drop image/file
<blockquote><blockquote> i do mind going to get these things in public. i prefer the privacy of online shopping for these and other related merchandises. </blockquote><br /><br /><br />Apparently the average time for condom purchases is 7 seconds - aka no one likes buying them in public ha ha </blockquote><br />Not for me, I try them on.<br /><br /><br />10 years ago I was on my way to a "girl up the block's" house to unwind a bit, and stopped at 7-11 on the way for a 40 and a 3-pack. The condoms were behind the counter, so I grabbed the 40 and got in line. In walks D***y Pfl**ger, former local now expat wierdo who we used to torment in elementary school. I'm thinking "fuck" in more ways than one, and kid yells out "SWEEN!!" and falls in right behind me in line to catch up for a minute (hadn't seen him since 6th grade).<br /><br />So he's going on and on about his band and how progressive they are because they have a violinist and how they write songs about trolls and living in the woods and things like that, and now the line is getting long behind him and it's up to my turn. He's in midsentence when I say to the clerk "I need this and a pack of the Trojan light blue box" and kid without skipping a beat YELLS OUT "WOOOAH, SOMEBODY's GETTING LAID" then goes right back into his story about a setting a xylophone on fire on the solstice. <br /><br />Since that was just about as embarrasing as a condom purchase can possibly get I am now the most comfortable guy in the world when I buy them. Sometimes I slam them down on the counter FIRST before I put my other things down, just so the poor girl working at CVS knows that I'm about to get laid and it's not going to be her on the other end of the deal. I also like to watch them ring it up too, they try not to laugh and I'm staring right at them grinning like a Cheshire cat. I never even though about buying them in bulk because I don't want to lose out on one of life's simple pleasures.<br /><br />I'd be more embarrassed about NOT buying condoms than buying them. Let the world know you're fucking, what's wrong with that?
Cancel