Soul Strut

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Twice. Once when I was in hawaii, I had just landed that evening and went out with my friend and his girlfriend drinking. 6am rolled around, we headed to a spot called Cromwells or Cramwells or something like that, Brian might know it. Already drunk as fuck, and just then we crack open a bottle of either gin or vodka, one of the clear ones. A couple swigs off that and then we were off running on these craggy-ass rocks that run along a cliffside (at least that's how I remember it). Start running back a half hour later after some swimming when the waves start to pick up. I'm the last one back, and maybe thirty feet before the end I start to get real dizzy, the rocks are all slippery and sharp, and the waves when the come in are covering the rocks. I make it through the first two, then a third one comes and takes my feet out. I did some type of drunk Irish flip, and landed straight down on my forehead and snap my neck back. My friend thought I broke my neck. I wound up with 7 stitches in my forehead and coral burn scars on my wrist, and a slight concussion. In the hospital I tried to tip the nurse to "make it nice", referring to my stitches. I don't know if she knew what I meant. The other time I fell 18 feet off of a telephone pole after getting attacked by bees, and landed on the roof of an old Buick. Then my ladder landed on top of me. If the car wasn't there I would have landed on my side in the street, and the fall would have been 23 feet. I wasn't as scared as the Hawaiian fall, but I really thought I was SCREWED as I was falling. As soon as I landed I wiggled my toes and fingers and knew my spine was fine, then replayed everything that happened in my head so I knew I didn't have a concussion. Then I tried to drag myself off the car but couldn't, I got as far as the hood with the ladder still stuck on me when the person came running out of their house telling me not to move since an ambulance was coming. So I laid there. Wound up with a twisted back, no big deal.

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